Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Haast

Haast

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iannis said:
Sessions are a fine thing. When they work what you get is a referee, a fresh insight into conflicts which are obviously at an impasse, and a compartmentalized safe space. That safe space is the most important. Its not the physical room, it is a boundary in the mind. Linking it to a physical place and person can be genuinely helpful to many people, although it is not necessary to do so.
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And when they don't work:
 
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Noodleface

Noodleface

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Mrs. Gravy said:
So, I immediately read that Picasso's wife is going to fuck the marriage counselor when he answered she was going solo to the question posed.
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Maybe that's what she needs

Tbh if my wife wanted to have sex with other people I'd be ok if it was another woman.
 
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P

Picasso3

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Guys this is the grown up forum.

Please limit discussion to mature stuff like getting divorced over not hiring maids fast enough.
 
Soygen

Soygen

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Picasso3 said:
Guys this is the grown up forum.

Please limit discussion to mature stuff like getting divorced over not hiring maids fast enough.
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There's that droll attitude again.

42551c4f1c20f14192b90212a3e7e6e08236c463.gif
 
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Namon

Namon

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Phazael said:
P Picasso3
In my personal experience, "hard to read" is usually a euphemism for "I don't believe what you tell me", especially in the context of relationships. I know there are people who swear by therapists and having a "referee" to keep things civil, but I am not a big fan of it. If you need a goal tender to behave with someone you took vows with, its probably a sign that one or both parties do not have their hearts in it.

If you have kids who are still in school and/or you love your wife enough, then do whatever it takes. If not, then consider for a moment that life is too short to waste and you both might be better off moving on.
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I dunno, I look at my marriage as an investment. When I said I do, that was me saying I'm willing to put in the time for us to be together in 50 years. To me personally, at that point, my wife was no longer a non relative person who I can cut ties with like a friend or an acquaintance or a girlfriend. She is now, on a relational level, more akin to a family member. If your siblings or parents piss you off royal, unless its something completely off the ranch like abuse or whatnot, then you do all you can to reconcile the relationship. The same applies to my wife.

I can name off all the things I feel my wife fails at in our marriage (and there are 2 or 3 huge ones), and many of them are stated as justification to leaving a marriage in this thread. However, after nearly 12 years of marriage, two kids (I know you mentioned kids still in school), a house, and the life that comes with all of those things, that is just something I can't simply walk away from, regardless of where her heart is or isn't. If she felt counseling was something we needed, I'd do it without question. Because, while I largely agree with your overall point, I would want to show her how important our marriage is to me.
 
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Hoss

Hoss

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Khane said:
Interesting

self-es·teem
ˈˌself əˈstēm/
noun
  1. confidence in one's own worth or abilities; self-respect.
    "assertiveness training for those with low self-esteem"
    synonyms: self-respect, pride, dignity, self-regard, faith in oneself; More
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Pretty sure quoting the dictionary is racist now.

FYI I don't want your statue to get pulled down.
 
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Phazael

Phazael

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If Khane has a statue dedicated to him it will be something like the Army of darkness poster with smelly armpit girl clinging to his dick while he is reaching for his beer. Such a momument will be properly defended.
 
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Khane

Khane

Got something right about marriage
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Phazael said:
If Khane has a statue dedicated to him it will be something like the Army of darkness poster with smelly armpit girl clinging to his dick while he is reaching for his beer. Such a momument will be properly defended.
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I'm actually wearing that T-shirt right now. Not even kidding.
 
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Mrs. Gravy

Mrs. Gravy

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My dear men - the advice provided in this thread has been very helpful with regard to reviewing my own behavior and skills and applying the insights here in how to communicate more effectively with New. I have not necessarily used all of it, and perhaps modified it slightly to suit the realities of my situation, nevertheless, it has been helpful and providing fruit. - Thanks - you guys are just the best, I don't care what anyone says!

I just got off a phone call with New (he calls me) that was an hour and a half long...holy crap, that's longer than I talk to my sisters. In that conversation - there was lots of laughing, and shit-giving to one another (which I prefer) but also some sincere compliments given me and forward thinking relationship stuff (he brought up, not me), we came up with our Halloween costumes...(it was a tangent from another topic), talked about him teaching me how to be a better video game player (G never had the patience for it - I pretty much suck but really like any of the games that have driving or shooting in them), in return, I am going to teach him how to play cribbage, I love to play card games. Also - we are taking a 5 day vacation together - camping YAY - to his most favorite spot ever where he does not tell anyone about so we talked about that too and planned some day trips from it.

His life is going well right now in many aspects (home, golfing -he says he has been playing the best ever, fishing - he caught a massive bass this summer, work - raise/promotion, his hobby/second line - he is an artist and he has been being hired for some portrait work). I of course told him it started the day he asked me for my number. ;)

I am magic - who needs some magic - I will send some your way.
 
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Mrs. Gravy

Mrs. Gravy

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moonarchia said:
Boobs are the only form of payment we take here. And they are magic.
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Can they be anyone's? (Mine are a no go, a. they are tiny, b. G would haunt me c. despite some evidence to the contrary. I do keep some things to myself.)
I would be happy to supply others though, in an appropriate location, of course.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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Only if you took them in real life

Also mrs G you just opened us up to a new aspect when you said he played video games. See we are expert on video games and we're going to need to judge him on what he plays..
 
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