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I developed an allergy to barley in my late twenties, that one really blows, I loved craft beers and scotch, now I can't even smell beer being brewed without my throat closing up

Are we doing old ladies we would bang now, if so I call dibs on Helen Mirren

oops not the video thread

She will only have you if you're circumcised

A guy walks into a bar and says, "I just heard a great redneck joke!" A HUGE guy stands up off a barstool and says, "Just a minute, buddy. Before you tell that joke, I'm Jake. I'm six-three and weigh two-eighty, all muscle. And I'm a redneck. That guy over there is a professional wrestler, and...

I got mine on my mother's chevy citation, it was crap