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Is that supposed to be a tit?

I feel like I'm learning not to trust glory holes.

Ima make Kirk cry

Losing your mental and physical capabilities slowly over time without being able to do anything about it, but aware that it's happening. Oh wait, that's growing old.

Helen Mirren is the sexist old broad.

what kind of monster would do that to this woman's picture

Mother fuck, I've made the most regrettable picks.

The mystery is going to be Danny DeVito

I'm fine with #9, too bad she won't be able to talk.

This is like russian roulette, and half the chambers are full. I'm going with 7.

Jesus fuck, this was the least risky draw and I ended up getting a retarded midget.

I got a rando call from some Atlanta number today. Some western asian sounding dudes were saying they were the IRS. Called them back from the burner phone. They asked a bunch of questions and I told them my name was William Wonka, gave them the last 4 digits of my social 3210, and they said...

The people in Seattle are generally more polite and nice than say the other urban areas in the US. Last time I was there I stayed with friends in Madrona on the westside. Really beautiful. If you get to travel outside of the area, snoqualmie Falls is a nice place to visit.

They hadn't starting dating yet. That's probably how they met.