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Eomer would like a word with you.

Congratulations, you like the same girls I like.

I"m the Wingman, so that you don"t have to be.

I"m having a really hard time with my girlfriend"s C cups. They"re so small compared to my usual fare. My ex-wife is a D/DD, my last "real" girlfriend was a DD/E, and no, they weren"t blubberous monstrosities. Ex-girlfriend"s were probably the nicest. Firm, yet huge. *lament*

^5, love.

Oh, I don"t care about that stuff. I just care that Brad thinks he can give credible advice. Why? Which is exactly why you can"t give advice. YOU DON"T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WOMEN. Learning comes from failure. How do you think we can sit here and tell you all about the fuck ups you think you can...

Hey guys! SEMEN SEMEN SEMEN! Om nom nom. I give a lot of advice, because I"ve been in a LOT of situations and I know what works. My advice has helped Aychamo to find true love (lol), Eomer to handle a "batshit crazy girl" and whatnot. I was wrong with Xerxes, but that"s because Eomer...

No offense, fuck off with relationship advice, Brad.

*sigh* Eomer.

I love Zehn"s posts, but the game he wants he already hated

Good thing I"m like 95% straight. I"d hate to break your paradigm. The mature and grown-up part of me wants to commend you on your honesty and doing what"s right. The other part of me wants me to call you a retard for passing up free sex. Dude, it"s like pizza--even when it"s bad, it"s good.

Don"t worry, bro. I only like smelly hippies or Tom Cruise look-a-likes.

I don"t think it"s a feud. I think it"s more like, awkwardly groping foreplay.

He"s tried to hint at it, she either isn"t picking up the hints or just doesn"t care. If it"s the former, he needs to come out and say it"s not that important to him and ask if there"s any way they can find a way to share her interest in it (if it truly is a passion) or if she"s just crazy about...

So ask her to stop?

Not at all. I"m average and fuck average (and in my current situation, way above my paygrade) women. Notice I said women. You need to work on your trolling. Not yet! We"re doing amazingly well, though. Thanks for asking! Still can"t really devote too much time to it just yet as the (soon-to-be)...

I"ve had 5 serious partners that I"ve gonesans raincoatwith and 4 of them liked the aforementioned activity. This over the course of about 9 years. Of course, I"m sure there were a few slip n" dips here or there, but I don"t remember them. Clean bill of health! It also helps that I have lower...

... birth control? I suppose monogamous relationships with one partner at a time are taboo around these parts. One of the benefits of being involved in a strong, committed relationship is that you get to go bareback whenever you"d like.

I just wish you guys had freakier women. The depths of depravity some women can show you is simply mind-blowing. It"s more of a slurp, really. Just don"t let it go too far down your throat, it"ll make you gag. That"s why I never understood why some chicks love to swallow, but hey. Some women are...

Prudes. It"s not gay if it"s yours. OMG, you"re touching cock when you masturbate!

Cialis is better than Viagra if you"re going for marathon fuck sessions. Cialis basically over-rides your natural refraction time and lets you get hard as much as you need for the next 36 hours. If you can stomach it, most chicks I"ve been with absolutely go bananas when you blow your load in...

Eomer: Dude. Duuuude. Tits?

Herpes.

It"s okay. It"s courtship. He does the same to me.

No shit? Well tell your buddies to stop bringing it up because I only talked about it once in this thread. Every other time has been some homophobe"s over-the-top reaction to it, or every time they feel the need to let me know they thought of some cock-sucking and it reminded them of me. Really...

You got the last seat on the bandwagon! Congratulations! Still ruining your son"s life by being unstable and unable to form lasting relationships that would provide him the foundation for a good life that your ex can provide, but apparently you cannot?

@Aychamo: You wouldn"t know what being a mature, centered adult was like if it showed you it"s brown-eye on the interwebs. Tenks gives good advice, but be careful about the "saying hi" part. I"ve noticed it only works here in the Midwest to great effect. Must be our Ohio culture. Other places...

It"s about being a man. Men handle their business face to face, with resolution and conviction. You can do it over the phone, write her a letter, write her an email or text her. But you"ll see the truth of your thoughts and feelings and feel a lot better for it if you do it in person. Yes...

BUT AYCHAMO, YOUR LIFE IS SUNSHINE AND BUTTERFLIES AND FULL OF AWESOME. You fuck models, and live the perfect life, amirite? Fuck you, drama queen. Because now people on this board will be forced to care about you, and Req will have to call the cops in your area.

Are you trying to commit every sin in the relationship book? Seriously? DO NOT MIX BUSINESS WITH PLEASURE. You are definitely not emotionally stable enough to pull it off. Well, I"m one of the few here that admits he doesn"t fuck super-models, and I have posted nudes of my ex"s before in...

Nope, it wasn"t planned. Just that I might, if Eomer ever came to Ohio. James rebuffed me, so I guess that"s my only chance for non-herpeloid dick.

Weren"t you (self) banned or something for a while? God.

You"re the idiot that showed your asshole on the internet. Take some responsibility for your actions.

no. a pros calls her clients that.

She already knows, she reads the boards. She"s really cool and doesn"t care. Her fantasy isn"t that, so I wont have to prepare myself to do that again. Win/Win for you guys!

1) Didn"t suck anyone off. 2) What about my post is facetious?

/livejournal Spoiler Alert, click show to read:So, after having my marriage dissolve and turn into something completely strange and weird, I"ve decided to move on. I"ve been friends with this girl for the duration of my time at Wright State, and she and my wife sat in the same row in Chinese...

You can fix fat, but you can"t fix personality.

Oh, Cad. You just lost all of your middle-class clout.

What? No. You just went weird quiet about your relationship after everyone dog-piled you about your request for advice. I don"t care if you"re happy. Why? Because I know that deep down, I helped you be happy. And you can"t take that away from me <3