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Wouldn"t that make her more likely to be harpooned?

Someone"s imaginary friend, I"d wager. Much like most of the other main players in this fucked up act.

My bad. It"s April that"s Jabba. Ashley is a shaved Ewok.

.

And about 345 pounds.

Easy there Jabba.

They keep her on retainer in case they need a quick answer to an algebra problem.

Buy ZesteSoapCo so you can be Zestefully, Zestefully, Zestefully clean!

Boom! Your title is well earned.

You are so utterly full of shit.

Srsly. How did people on the internet appear to be smart before Google came out?

It"s not just you. The antics of these freaks would boggle Fox and Mulder.

From the folder marked "X-Files".

Who the fuck was your father? Grizzly Adams?

Why don"t you do something useful like reducing your genetic footprint instead of wasting money you don"t have on something you don"t need.

This is what butlers are for. You"ve got money, spend it.

More pics of Shelley naked. Speaking of which, I just found some new ones on Reddit: Spoiler Alert, click show to read:Spoiler Alert, click show to read:Spoiler Alert, click show to read:Spoiler Alert, click show to read:Spoiler Alert, click show to read:Spoiler Alert, click show to...

She"s a counselor at Planned Parenthood.

Your life is an airplane crash, but in very, very slow motion.

Do ya"ll wear glow in the dark name tags so you know who you are fucking that night?

As Seen In Shreveport

Sad thing is, Galiem"s MMO characters probably have a higher net worth than he does.

I"m pretty sure Eomer wants to date within his own species. I"m not going out on a limb here because he seems like a sane, well-adjusted human being that has no interest in plugging whatever hole you just created in whatever cow* you fancy that is unfortunate enough to live on a farm near the...

She gets to have it because you gave it to her. It becomes HERS and not yours in the process of being a gift. The sweaters, garter belts, stockings, shoes, subscriptions to Time, fucking Ipod music shit and the rest are gifts for her being her and not some rental contract dependent upon you...

So...you are taking gifts back now? I bought it as a gift to her. In that transaction it stops being mine and becomeshers. She could wear it in a fucking bukkake video for all I care. I gave it to her so it"s HERS to do with what she wants. You want that garment to be Rent-A-Wear so long as...

The pleasure graph intersects with the pain graph right at 5. 6 is the hammer hitting the anvil and 7 is every neuron that previously glowed through 1-4 getting skinned alive and rolled around in salt, then made to watch every Jennifer Aniston love comedy in one sitting, then getting slammed...

I"ve never had blue balls, but try getting the screw on 7 times in one day and getting the dry fires because there"s no more rounds left in the magazine. It"s like a hammer hitting an anvil.

Rod Serling needs to be the main moderator of FOHSS. This place really is the fucking Twilight Zone.

VISA irons that shit right out. Just don"t let it run out of credit juice, because that"s the secret ingredient in keeping women mellow. Well, that and a prehensile penis like mine.

You forgot the best ones.

You married a spy.

Portland is where women go to keep from becoming a lump of soil in the backyward of their crazy ex.

I"ve seen your bedroom and fuck the risk of a ban, I"m going to tell all. First of all, you painted the walls in a warm color yet painted the ceiling in a fluorescent white. Goodbye warm, hello operating room. Repaint ceiling in an ivory and go from there. Also, drapes are so 19th century...

...the recollection of which actually made me physically ill.

That"s all he"d have to do to never see her again.

The comedy of it all.

By not wearing a fucking condom.

At least her username matches. C-Cuppycake, where are you?

You don"t like the fat little hobbitses?

He likes fatties and dwarves...he is a man of diverse interests.