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I've dated girls uglier than you for breakfast. Fool proof pick up line.

I had a wife once, it was terrible. Oh fuck, wrong thread. Shoulda bought a wife cooker.

It's not just you. You shuuuuush your mouth before you ruin it for the rest of us.

After about 27 wears anyway.

Why did you leave the bacon and cheese out of the slash extravaganza? And why is there an n dash between corned and beef? Take a break bro. Take a fuckin break.

I don't think that's the point LL was trying to convey.

No... you don't back down now. Put on Master Chef in the background and you've lost all Alpha dominance you Beta fuck. You pour yourself a glass of white wine and you rock that infinity scarf and you tell that bitch if she doesn't like it too fucking bad because it's cold. It's cold and you had...

You've been turned down a lot have you?

I'm not a meta expert but it seems to me since dragon no longer gives gold teams can't force dragon fights. That one fact alone lets teams that have gotten ahead force the hand of their opposition much earlier which typically results in severely lopsided games. Of course it's only the first...

So I've been toying around with the idea of credit card "flipping" to invest an exorbitant amount of other people's money into energy/oil stocks for my own personal gain. I'm pretty much Donald Trump right now.

Alternatively, buy an investment property. Then you don't have to worry about anything joeboo just mentioned.

As someone who has not played League in years but actively enjoys watching it, this new meta is really fucking boring. It feels like there is no mechanism for a team to come back. Got an early lead? YOU WIN! Games have been really boring so far. Hopefully that's just new season conclusion...

Well sex ed did always make me hungry. It was a really confusing time for me.

The hot dog is technically inside the chicken. So more like a Red, White and Bleu.

Why is there so much "white noise" in that video? I wonder what kind of rice burner (motorcycle, but it's the cooking thread) that was in the background.

Well I wouldn't say I'm missing it Bob.

I got a care package from my real estate agent a month after I closed on my house. I wonder if it was more apologetic than anything else. Pretty sure it was since she did exactly nothing except collect a paycheck.

Is it though? You've already come out of it, might as well get back in it.

Well, I mean... it's canned tomatoes. Was I ever really "alive"?

That's why most of us still post here. We're hoping to find "the one"

Snow day!

Why are they only serving 50? When I eat a hot dog I want to taste the hot dog because there is a very distinct reason I ordered a hot dog. Because I want to taste the hot dog. I hope I was clear enough there.

As opposed to some young, miserable fuck who's mom had to move out because he never was going to? Oh shit... that was a sick grownup forums burn. Take that to the weight loss thread and suck it!!!!! Little Sumpin' Sumpin' ale makes me adversarial.

Bros, it's supposed to snow like the dickens (turduckens?) here the next few days so I made some bangin chili. But I used canned tomatoes so I don't know if I'm allowed to post here. Chopped garlic, jalapenos, dried habaneros, green bell peppers, yellow and red onion, cumin, a touch of...

The turkey sierra sandwich is pretty dope indeed.

Oooooh you're so dark and brooding. Are you also tall and handsome? I'm pretty much a super down to earth total girl next door type, just looking for my prince charming.

If the idea of a relationship actually scares the shit out of someone I'd probably ask them how they get over their fear of electricity and make it through a day without collapsing into a panic whenever they smell burnt toast. In other words, I'd make her laugh and then put it in her butt.

I always chuckle a bit when people talk about ideas "scaring the shit out of them". Is that supposed to be some polite way of saying "slow down weirdo" or does the idea of cohabitating literally scare the shit of some people? I mean... the idea of bungee jumping or skydiving scares the shit out...

You think a big mac is hard to make? It's thousand island dressing with a little mustard on 2 shitty hamburger patties...

On my 20th birthday I celebrated with liquor. On my 30th birthday I celebrated with drugs. On my 40th birthday I'll celebrate with food.

That was a long post, you are obviously thinking long and hard however do not rush, you don't need to. Interest rates are not going to move even close to that much in a year. They've been sub 5% for about 6 years now and property values also are not going to move 10% within a year. You will not...

Flipping a standard outlet falls into "easiest DIY job ever" category. Not sure about the special outlets you need for washer/dryer... do ovens use the same outlets? Just shut off your electricity, pull the outlet out, flip it, put it back in, turn electricity back on. And by "turn off your...

Actually, she should be smacked for not realizing there is nothing wrong with fat in meat at all. 80/20 is not healthier AND it doesn't taste as good. He should have backhanded that broad.

Hey fuck you dirk ya know what?

I laughed.

No, but he is the bro who's gonna be gagging her with his crank when she's ovulating.

You can't truly hate until you've loved first Deathwing.

Cascade was one of the places I went to, more than once, while I was in Portland. Almost entirely sours but they did have some other stuff. And the sours were really good as opiate said