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Microsoft

Hold the fucking phone one goddamn minute. Why are your doritos shaped like elongated dick heads?

I'm not really sure what the point of this was either. I created custom filters and folders in my gmail already.. so.. what is this for..

This show is so shitty

Don't forget, a shit ton of people got MOP beta access when they paid for a year of WoW (plus got diablo 3 for free), so I'd be willing to bet a lot more people "saw" it before launch and decided against it.

No bro you don't get it, they can just rent servers and provisions VMs and poof it is solved.

Oh I've mastered the "yes, uh huh, oh Peter is a dick huh?" It's especially easy as my commute home she likes to call me and bitch about her day. I have in-car phone capabilities so I basically just drive and occasionally say some comment.

When I applied for life insurance at my company there was a limit ($350,000) before they required you to disclose any pre-existing conditions. If we wanted to move up to the $500,000 plan then I'd have to get checked out by a doctor and probably denied. Is your case different?

There's a hard limit to how many 'instances' of zones they can have, limited by their hardware. You can bet they have top of the line hardware, and it is provisioned in such a way that during normal business loads it handles the playerbase without a hitch. When suddenly that number skyrockets to...

They were "good enough", she's not above hourly jobs

Yeah fuck blizzard and their rookie mistakes, it's not like they're the most successful MMO of all time or anything

If it was just the post office I'd understand, but it was also her 3 previous office jobs as well.

So the underlying problem here is that women can't work jobs because to them it is always exactly like highschool with Becky not doing this and Steve said this and Jason is fat. My wife complains so much about her job I just can't understand how she makes it through the day.

I should also mention, I don't really want to take anything away from the dudes here with serious problems like cancer. I would hope people got some enjoyment out of my misfortune. When I say it was 10/10 pain levels, I'm sure it's a 1/10 for you bros. Keep up the good fight.

I enjoy salary. I'm technically supposed to work 8am-5pm. Sometimes I'm stuck here until 10pm if we have a sev 1 issue, sometimes I leave at 3 if I feel like it. Sometimes I work from home.

Of course you're salaried, because they know if you were hourly you wouldn't be putting in that extra time because they wouldn't want to actually pay you for it.

Money is all the same to me, if a company wants me to work hourly and they're willing to pay more then sign me up.

Amazon has some B2G1 deals going on for board games, Target as well.

Vvoid we're practically blood brothers at this point

One time at a strip club this older classy stripper came up to me and kissed/forced a mint into my mouth. I did not eat it. I still am not sure how I feel about that. She told me "there's more where that came from" and I wasn't sure if she was inferring that she had a load of mints out back or...

What class you rolling as Ut?

I've never been to one that has had a buffet. I find the thought unappealing and quite offensive.

I only used it a couple times when it was open and bloody, now it's healing so I'm just using the neosporin. Feels good. Skins still a bit hard but I assume and hope that will go down after awhile.

I can't believe after all these years that people would ever in a million fucking years believe what a publisher said about how many hours a game is. Never once EVER has a game been as long as a publisher said.

My wife's pregnancy boobs are in. This is the greatest moment of my life

Fitting a square peg into a round hole has an all new meaning

I find it depends how I approach initiation. If I go in all lovey-dovey, I'm sure to get a gentle-look-into-my-eyes type of ride. If I go after it like I want to bend her over the couch and hit her so deep I touch her tonsils, then I am sure to get a porno-fuck-fest. If she initiates, there is...

I didn't want to risk getting staph or MRSA in her vagina/ass.

I didn't find the special effects in the Hobbit movies to be top-notch. LOTR looks like it could be passable for real life in many spots, The Hobbit uses WAY too much CGI for its own good and it ruins it. Almost every Orc/Uruk/whatever the fuck is CG where LOTR used mostly (I think) real...

I'm glad someone appreciates my one-liners and quite frankly I am touched that I was recognized publicly for them. If it makes you feel any better I've had a golfball sized boil on my ass and unable to sex my wife for a couple weeks.

Yep I'd remove admin rights and give them separate accounts. My wife has fucked up my laptop so many times.

I just download the ElvUI package and Skada. You'll never need anything else ever again, unless you want auctioneer or something.

400 is a steal when it comes with two awesome fucking masterpiece games

If this is one of the most fucked up things you've ever seen on the internet you might as well cut the cord and turn around

My wife's problem was slightly unrelated. She worked outside all summer and something with our water/detergent - I have no idea. For me it was probably at work. I do the nest on the toilet before sitting, but you never know what sickly fuck was on there before you. On Friday I pulled out...

I got YOLOSWAG and don't give a FUCK

I go every year, but I enjoy seeing the darker side of humanity. One year I went to Target with my wife and didn't want to shop so I sat in the little food area counting how many shoplifters I saw brazenly walk right out the door. They could say an XB1 was $200 and came with 5 free games and...

Bro you ever try crack?

I assume you're doing this in safemode mkopec?

Power supply or busted capacitors on the motherboard - they would look like they exploded.