Cocaine Bear (2023)

Edaw

Edaw

Parody
<Gold Donor>
12,261
77,679
My apologies Amod Amod , could you move all the bear stuff to the appropriate thread:

Cocaine Bear (2023)

Title: Cocaine Bear Genre: Crime, Comedy, Thriller Director: Elizabeth Banks Cast: Keri Russell, O'Shea Jackson Jr., Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Alden Ehrenreich, Ray Liotta, Margo Martindale, Kristofer Hivju, Christian Convery, Brooklynn Prince, Kahyun Kim, Scott Seiss, Isiah Whitlock Jr...
www.firesofheaven.org www.firesofheaven.org

Thanks.
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user
Rabbit_Games

Rabbit_Games

Molten Core Raider
861
1,925
You see that stellar fucking cast? (R.I.P. Ray Liotta) This is going to be fucking amazeballs. Even the kid sold his line like a champ, "It kinda seems like a thing that stays with a man forever." LOL
 
  • 4Like
Reactions: 3 users
Scoresby

Scoresby

Trakanon Raider
783
1,436
This looks way better than a movie about a bear doing cocaine has any reason to be.
 
  • 5Like
  • 1Edgelord
Reactions: 5 users
BrutulTM

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
<Silver Donator>
14,429
2,213
I would watch this just for Keri Russell. The coked out bear and Ray Liotta are icing on the cake.
 
  • 3Like
  • 1Solidarity
Reactions: 3 users
Ossoi

Ossoi

Tranny Chaser
15,823
7,870
1670022186665.png
 
Khane

Khane

Got something right about marriage
19,821
13,335
Haha, amazing.

Also that bear is obviously lying about its weight. The thought of a tiny ass 175lb bear is just as funny as the trailer
 
  • 1Solidarity
Reactions: 1 user
Chukzombi

Chukzombi

Millie's Staff Member
71,663
212,883
since nobody else here took their girl to see this but me, because i love horror comedies. this was "ok". it wasnt great, it wasnt bad. better than Ant Man for sure. pretty sad that this was Ray Liotta's final film because his character was all over the place and finally devolvng into Bela Lugosi schlock at the end. pretty fucking sad. the gore was pretty craptastic CGI. the jokes were not very funny, though i did laugh at the old park ranger lady capping that one dude in the head. this movie was so surreal. the coke raged bear was the most realistic thing about this film. of course the end scene very heavily hinted at a sequel. so get ready for the anouncement of Cocaine Bear 2: The Brood!
 
  • 3Like
  • 1Solidarity
Reactions: 3 users
TheNozz

TheNozz

Ssraeszha Raider
6,804
34,697
Just saw this earlier.

I really wanted to like this movie, but I got bored after the first 20 mins or so.

Too many plot threads and too many characters for a film thats only 90 mins.

For the first time I can remember in awhile, I'd say its a 6/10: I almost wish I hadn't seen it even for matinee price. I dare say the film sucks.
 
  • 2Like
Reactions: 1 users
Chukzombi

Chukzombi

Millie's Staff Member
71,663
212,883
TheNozz said:
Just saw this earlier.

I really wanted to like this movie, but I got bored after the first 20 mins or so.

Too many plot threads and too many characters for a film thats only 90 mins.

For the first time I can remember in awhile, I'd say its a 6/10: I almost wish I hadn't seen it even for matinee price. I dare say the film sucks.
Click to expand...
it felt like the broad who directed this had way too many trope boxes to check when cooking up this film in order to save her career.
the most ridicuous thing was the wilderness gay muggers. i even said out loud, "gay muggers, in the woods?" it was way more ridiculous than the obese park ranger woman who decided to search for the small children, on foot. she could barely walk, no vehicle?

edit
wait, i just thought of something worse. the black danny glover cop type walking into woods he never been to before, finding the gazebo and noticing the duffel bag of coke at the top. then somehow he jumps off a tree onto the gazebo to retrieve it (off camera). if i think about it even more, i'm sure there are more egregiously retarded things.
 
Last edited:
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user
BrutulTM

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
<Silver Donator>
14,429
2,213
"A bear in the wild ate some cocaine and went hog wild" is a pretty thin premise. Was always going to need some filling in to make a movie.
 
Ambiturner

Ambiturner

Ssraeszha Raider
16,040
19,499
Chukzombi said:
it felt like the broad who directed this had way too many trope boxes to check when cooking up this film in order to save her career.
the most ridicuous thing was the wilderness gay muggers. i even said out loud, "gay muggers, in the woods?" it was way more ridiculous than the obese park ranger woman who decided to search for the small children, on foot. she could barely walk, no vehicle?

edit
wait, i just thought of something worse. the black danny glover cop type walking into woods he never been to before, finding the gazebo and noticing the duffel bag of coke at the top. then somehow he jumps off a tree onto the gazebo to retrieve it (off camera). if i think about it even more, i'm sure there are more egregiously retarded things.
Click to expand...

Did you think this was supposed to be a serious movie played straight?
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user
Bandwagon

Bandwagon

Kolohe
<Silver Donator>
22,709
59,513
Ambiturner said:
Did you think this was supposed to be a serious movie played straight?
Click to expand...
Silly is fine, when it works. Like Tucker & Dale vs Evil.

The way I've been reading these reviews, it sounds like it's the type of silly that didn't really work.
 
  • 1Solidarity
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 users
Haus

Haus

<Silver Donator>
11,031
41,660
Local Alamo Drafthouse promotion co-branding with the movie is perfectly on point....
1677606071029.png

The Cocaine Bear 8-ball. 8 donute holes, and the powdering is a mix of powdered sugar and cayenne pepper dust.
 
Adebisi

Adebisi

Clump of Cells
<Silver Donator>
27,674
32,714
It's fine. Some good chuckles.

What more can you ask from a movie called Cocaine Bear
 
  • 3Like
Reactions: 2 users
spronk

spronk

FPS noob
22,588
25,619

out on VOD/torrents, just 3 weeks after theatrical release but its already made its money back
 
  • 3Like
Reactions: 2 users
You must log in or register to reply here.