Lendarios' Frijoles Thread: Latin American Politics

Lendarios

Potato del Grande
16,038
-5,378
Lendarios Lendarios scream fills the enpty void that is his life with alcohol, cocaine, street walkers and young eager boys who are trying to make it on the industry. He has become what can only be described as a nihilist.
When you put it like that.

Now I feel bad for my life =(
 

Screamfeeder

The Dirtbag
<Banned>
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Lendarios Lendarios scream fills the enpty void that is his life with alcohol, cocaine, street walkers and young eager boys who are trying to make it on the industry. He has become what can only be described as a nihilist.
That doesn't even make sense. I am literally right here because I believed in something. The rest is all true, but nihilist...I mean, say what you want about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it's an ethos.
 

a_skeleton_03

<Banned>
29,948
29,758
My parents owned a large avocado grove in San Diego. One time the wind came through, a big Santa Ana, and knocked quite a lot of fruit off the tree. This was after I was in the Marines. My dad walked the grove disappointed at all of them on the ground. Then he thought to himself, if each of those was a dollar bill I would pick them up. They were worth easily a dollar a piece. So he worked tirelessly all night picking them up off the ground and crating them up.

The next year a wildfire ruined the grove and they sold it to the water company for a decent chunk of cash.
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
<Gold Donor>
27,152
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I wish I had an avocado grove. They are expensive!
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
<Gold Donor>
27,152
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I just want the avocados. I'll pick and eat them myself. Crisis solved!
 

Screamfeeder

The Dirtbag
<Banned>
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I just want the avocados. I'll pick and eat them myself. Crisis solved!
I got avocado trees AND a macadamia nut tree. Why don't you come by. Say 8? You enjoy Pinot Grigio? Oh what am I saying, of COURSE you do.

See you soon. xoxo
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
<Gold Donor>
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Phew, that was a close one. I almost got got!
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
<Gold Donor>
27,152
35,675
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Avocado tree take forever to bear fruit, like 5 to 10 years. Start planting now Soygen.
Yeah, there is one in front of my mom's house that's been there about 7 years and this year was the first time we ever saw fruit on it. I think it had like 3 pieces total and it's a HUGE tree. Lame.
 

Screamfeeder

The Dirtbag
<Banned>
13,309
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You poor boy. I can see it now. As you stand in the desert, gazing up at the southern face of that big beautiful wall, all you'll manag to meekly squeak out over your sniffles and literally shaking is "just an expanded fence..."

Hardly.


Let me give you the more accurate scenario.

















FADE IN.
A long stretch of road in a desert panorama that fades into the distance. A lone car drives along it.

V.O.
"""It's been so long. You and I...*pause*...through so much."""

CUT TO
The DRIVER. Looking ahead. Focused. Resolute. He has the hard chin, set eyes and rough exterior of a man that not only gets results, but expects them.

CUT TO
The PASSENGER. An obese, soft and effeminate man. Used to the comfortable. He is excitedly pointing and clapping at every feature that comes through the dusty window.

V.O.
""""You would FINALLY get to meet my mother.""""

CUT TO
The PASSENGER begins to clap hysterically.

Passenger
"Scream! Scream! LOOK AT THE BIG DOGS!!!!!"

The Driver is focused on the road but manages a half smile, he knows this poor soul. He understands this poor soul.

DRIVER
"Those are cows Mario."

Passenger
"Ooooooooo Cows!"

CUT TO
Hours later the travelers arrive at their destination. White Sands New Mexico.

MONTAGE
MARIO(The Passenger) running from the car, squealing in glee. Scream (The Driver) lighting up a cigarette and giving a small nod to Mario.

MARIO
"Let's run until we can't stop Scream!"

Mario runs off into the dunes. Heedless of the danger he is in. Scream knows his soft, bulbous body can't last more than an hour or two in this harsh environment, tendies or no.

SCREAM
"Don't go far Mario."

Scream grabs the extra water, and the emergency pack of CHICKEN TENDERS. This isn't new to him but he wants to indulge. After a few minutes of watching MARIO run up an down the dunes
Scream is ready to head back. It will be afternoon soon.


CUT TO
MARIO is twirling in a circle on top of a very large dune. Suddenly, he trips over his own feet and falls out of view.

CUT TO
SCREAM sees MARIO go plunging off the side of a large dune and out of view. Leaping into action he vaults up the sand wall in only a few steps. He reaches MARIO who is sobbing gently and holding his knee. There is some sand rubbed into a small scratch on his leg. Scream takes as much of Marios body into his strong, Irish-Jew arms as he is physically capable of.

ECU - MARIO EYES

ECU - MARIO LIPS

MARIO
"Show me the wall Scream."

SCREAM
"Mario, there is something you should know..."

MARIO
"I don't want to hear it Scream...please. We are so close. I need to see the wall."

This is a side of MARIO that SCREAM has never seen. So forceful. So vigorous. MARIO needs to see the wall.

CUT TO
SCREAM gathers MARIO up in his arms and looks toward the southern horizon. Toward the border. Toward...MEXICO. Something tremendous is about to happen.


FADE OUT

FADE IN

V.O. SCREAM
"""A 45 minute drive in silence to the outskirts of Las Cruces I pull off the main road and take us down a dirt fence road for another mile or so. Your breathing becoming heavier and heavier as you know we are close."""

SCREAM
"Right over that ridge Mario. That is the border. You sure you want to see this?"

MARIO
"Yes."
The word comes out as barely a whisper.

V.O. SCREAM
"""I know I am about to hurt the one I love, but knowing that it must be done. For you. For us. For America."""

CUT TO​
The Travelers begin the approach to the low-lying hills. SCREAM can sense MARIOS excitement. It almost excites SCREAM as well. It's the feeling a parent gets on Christmas morning when their kids come bouncing the stairs, eyes full of wonder and wondrous magic. You know it's a lie but you persist. For them. There is magic in this world, even for a short time and you want just a piece of it. Just for one second. SCREAM can barely see the finally few feet as they crest that hill. The mist in SCREAMS eyes is too much.He know the pain he is about to cause

CUT TO

As SCREAM stops at the top of the last hill, MARIO bounds from the car, leaving the door open in his excitement at finally getting to see first hand the wonders that SCREAMS hand helped wrought.

FADE - BLACK

SOUND OVER
Bong. Bong. Bong. Bong. Bong.


V.O. SCREAM
All I can hear is the door ajar alarm as the tears begin to flow.

SOUND OVER
Bong.

Bong.

Bong.

Bong.

Bong.



V.O. SCREAM
I'm expecting a scream of pain. Something primal and raw. But as I raise my head all I see is you. My dear Mario. Hands buried in the dry desert sand as you look upon what you have so long sought and found...​

CUT TO
In a second SCREAM is out of the car as well. Rushing to MARIOS side he hold him tight as he feels MARIOS soft gentle curves begin to heave, undulate and ripple like an earthquake over a land made of soft yogurt.

MARIO
'But...he said......he promised."

SCREAM
"I know. I know."

PAN UP SLOW OVER TRAVELERS​

As SCREAM raises his head to look about the empty vista he sees a flash of reflection. A mote of light bouncing off something metallic in the far off desert of Mexico. It's getting closer. As MARIOS sobs rack his poor, degenerate, bloated and soft body, SCREAM can just barely make out a sound in the distance. A lament for all those lost. A dirge.

[url=http://mobiles-media.com/ringtones/mp3/sound-effects/la-cucaracha-horn.mp3]End of Days[/URL]
 

Mario Speedwagon

Shitpost Plumber
<Prior Amod>
18,480
65,525
104d 15h 24m
Hardly.


Let me give you the more accurate scenario.

















FADE IN.
A long stretch of road in a desert panorama that fades into the distance. A lone car drives along it.

V.O.
"""It's been so long. You and I...*pause*...through so much."""

CUT TO
The DRIVER. Looking ahead. Focused. Resolute. He has the hard chin, set eyes and rough exterior of a man that not only gets results, but expects them.

CUT TO
The PASSENGER. An obese, soft and effeminate man. Used to the comfortable. He is excitedly pointing and clapping at every feature that comes through the dusty window.

V.O.
""""You would FINALLY get to meet my mother.""""

CUT TO
The PASSENGER begins to clap hysterically.

Passenger
"Scream! Scream! LOOK AT THE BIG DOGS!!!!!"

The Driver is focused on the road but manages a half smile, he knows this poor soul. He understands this poor soul.

DRIVER
"Those are cows Mario."

Passenger
"Ooooooooo Cows!"

CUT TO
Hours later the travelers arrive at their destination. White Sands New Mexico.

MONTAGE
MARIO(The Passenger) running from the car, squealing in glee. Scream (The Driver) lighting up a cigarette and giving a small nod to Mario.

MARIO
"Let's run until we can't stop Scream!"

Mario runs off into the dunes. Heedless of the danger he is in. Scream knows his soft, bulbous body can't last more than an hour or two in this harsh environment, tendies or no.

SCREAM
"Don't go far Mario."

Scream grabs the extra water, and the emergency pack of CHICKEN TENDERS. This isn't new to him but he wants to indulge. After a few minutes of watching MARIO run up an down the dunes
Scream is ready to head back. It will be afternoon soon.


CUT TO
MARIO is twirling in a circle on top of a very large dune. Suddenly, he trips over his own feet and falls out of view.

CUT TO
SCREAM sees MARIO go plunging off the side of a large dune and out of view. Leaping into action he vaults up the sand wall in only a few steps. He reaches MARIO who is sobbing gently and holding his knee. There is some sand rubbed into a small scratch on his leg. Scream takes as much of Marios body into his strong, Irish-Jew arms as he is physically capable of.

ECU - MARIO EYES

ECU - MARIO LIPS

MARIO
"Show me the wall Scream."

SCREAM
"Mario, there is something you should know..."

MARIO
"I don't want to hear it Scream...please. We are so close. I need to see the wall."

This is a side of MARIO that SCREAM has never seen. So forceful. So vigorous. MARIO needs to see the wall.

CUT TO
SCREAM gathers MARIO up in his arms and looks toward the southern horizon. Toward the border. Toward...MEXICO. Something tremendous is about to happen.


FADE OUT

FADE IN

V.O. SCREAM
"""A 45 minute drive in silence to the outskirts of Las Cruces I pull off the main road and take us down a dirt fence road for another mile or so. Your breathing becoming heavier and heavier as you know we are close."""

SCREAM
"Right over that ridge Mario. That is the border. You sure you want to see this?"

MARIO
"Yes."
The word comes out as barely a whisper.

V.O. SCREAM
"""I know I am about to hurt the one I love, but knowing that it must be done. For you. For us. For America."""

CUT TO​
The Travelers begin the approach to the low-lying hills. SCREAM can sense MARIOS excitement. It almost excites SCREAM as well. It's the feeling a parent gets on Christmas morning when their kids come bouncing the stairs, eyes full of wonder and wondrous magic. You know it's a lie but you persist. For them. There is magic in this world, even for a short time and you want just a piece of it. Just for one second. SCREAM can barely see the finally few feet as they crest that hill. The mist in SCREAMS eyes is too much.He know the pain he is about to cause

CUT TO

As SCREAM stops at the top of the last hill, MARIO bounds from the car, leaving the door open in his excitement at finally getting to see first hand the wonders that SCREAMS hand helped wrought.

FADE - BLACK

SOUND OVER
Bong. Bong. Bong. Bong. Bong.


V.O. SCREAM
All I can hear is the door ajar alarm as the tears begin to flow.

SOUND OVER
Bong.

Bong.

Bong.

Bong.

Bong.



V.O. SCREAM
I'm expecting a scream of pain. Something primal and raw. But as I raise my head all I see is you. My dear Mario. Hands buried in the dry desert sand as you look upon what you have so long sought and found...​

CUT TO
In a second SCREAM is out of the car as well. Rushing to MARIOS side he hold him tight as he feels MARIOS soft gentle curves begin to heave, undulate and ripple like an earthquake over a land made of soft yogurt.

MARIO
'But...he said......he promised."

SCREAM
"I know. I know."

PAN UP SLOW OVER TRAVELERS​

As SCREAM raises his head to look about the empty vista he sees a flash of reflection. A mote of light bouncing off something metallic in the far off desert of Mexico. It's getting closer. As MARIOS sobs rack his poor, degenerate, bloated and soft body, SCREAM can just barely make out a sound in the distance. A lament for all those lost. A dirge.

End of Days
Never before this moment have I been more convinced that you are, in fact, Jewish. A truly disgusting and degenerate piece of filth.

Also I get likeness rights when you sell this script. I'm sure the market for anti-trump propaganda flicks is going to be booming.
 
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Screamfeeder

The Dirtbag
<Banned>
13,309
11,199
51d 10h 31m
Never before this moment have I been more convinced that you are, in fact, Jewish. A truly disgusting and degenerate piece of filth.

Also I get likeness rights when you sell this script. I'm sure the market for anti-trump propaganda flicks is going to be booming.
Honestly, I shit this out in a few minutes. You give me a month with my development people and this will be a fucking HIT on HBO or Netflix. You get nothing.