Masters of the Universe (2026)

jayrebb

jayrebb

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Furry said:
Who the fuck is Jared Leto? I didn’t want to see this, but it was cause the trailer looked gay and retarded.
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Some guy who chronically over-acts and adds nothing of value to a box office ticket. Every movie he's in bombs and audiences don't want to see him.

20 year history of general audiences just hoping he fucks off.
 
Bald Brah

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TBT-TheBigToe said:
I want to see a movie with Leto, Jai Courtney, and Famke Jansen.
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Famke aged out a while ago, but what's wrong with Jai Courtney? I know he's been in a lot of crap but he's usually a bit part. I thought he was good in spartacus. He's certainly not toxic like Leto.
 
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TBT-TheBigToe

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Bald Brah said:
Famke aged out a while ago, but what's wrong with Jai Courtney? I know he's been in a lot of crap but he's usually a bit part. I thought he was good in spartacus. He's certainly not toxic like Leto.
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Some actors are a kiss of death, they were in a at least one good thing but, and really through no fault of their own, they end up being in a lot of fucking garbage. Famke Jensen and Jai Courtney are two of those actors, Edgar Ramirez is another one. There are a couple more but I can't remember their names right now.
Basically when you see one of these actors in something it's either going to be shit and bomb or it's going to be at-best-'okay' and still bomb.

I, personally, don't think Jared Leto being attached to He-Man is what hurt the box office (not significantly but he sure as hell didn't help), the fact that it was He-Man did. He-Man was a joke you watched between Transformers and GI Joe. You watched it with blocks of other cartoons like Inspector Gadget, Gem and The Holograms, Gummi Bears, and other shows like that. Everyone I knew that had He-Man toys got them because a relative saw them in the budget bin and thought it would make a nice and inexpensive gift.

They should have remembered who their audience is, not who they want them to be, and went hard fucking R with it and had blood and destruction, a lot of near but no actual nudity, and then ended it was a totally out of place morality lesson. End credit scene is Skeletor laughing and saying he'll be back. Or, instead of a movie, 10 30minute episodes that totally ape, in hard R, the original cartoons and include the morality lesson.

I dunno, I just never thought the movie was going to succeed because no one really gives a shit about He-Man.
 
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Rabbit_Games

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I was giving this some thought. Maybe too much.

Anyhow, try this take. Run with my Origin idea. Earth spaceship crashs down, King welcomes the Earthlings. Teaches them, including Adam's mom, their culture, etc. Marries the Earthling woman and during their Vows praises their peaceful assimilation.

Counter story with the terrorist group led be Skeletor, who society should absolutely not accept in their peaceful, high-trust civilization. Show what happens when you allow Evil, low IQ, freaky-looking people to run amuck unchallenged. After He-Man shows up and puts down the threat, make that the moral lesson at the end.
 
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spronk

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boys today have zero connection to He Man and hollywood has groomed boys to think only of girls as heroes and boys as (?? emotional support dogs ??) so not shocking the movie bombed. i don't think gen z or millenials have any connection to the show either, it was an extremely short lived series.

the whole history of the IP is stupid as hell, it was I think the first show created specifically to market toys (toys came first then show) as Reagan deregulated TV, before He Man it was basifally illegal for shows to heavily promote toys. He Man was also created because Mattel didn't pay the asking $750k to George Lucas back in 1976 for Star Wars action figures, and they were chasing that market ever since. Its fun to read about all the crazy 80s shenanigans, I guess not as bad as the 50s (studio system), 60s (smoking ads)

www.popmatters.com

Mastering the Universe: He-Man and the Rise and Fall of a Billion-Dollar Idea by Roger Sweet and Dav » PopMatters

For American children growing up in the 1980s, He-Man was like no action figure they'd ever seen -- a muscle-bound hero truly ready for battle. With knees
www.popmatters.com www.popmatters.com
 
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jayrebb

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1080p Screener out now at the usual places. Line audio, so no-- you can't enjoy it on your home theater or Dolby 5.1 yet. You'll be waiting till August for that.

Legit HD screener that was moved by admins into the cam category for "reasons" after originally being uploaded as a WEBrip. I was skeptical myself that it was indeed a "cam" and that the admins were going to be correct, but it's not a cam at all. The only thing admins were correct on is that it's not a WEBrip and had to be moved.

Fine for a watch with normal speakers or earbuds. Line audio isn't ideal, but it's very watchable.
 
Bald Brah

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jayrebb said:
1080p Screener out now at the usual places. Line audio, so no-- you can't enjoy it on your home theater or Dolby 5.1 yet. You'll be waiting till August for that.

Legit HD screener that was moved by admins into the cam category for "reasons" after originally being uploaded as a WEBrip. I was skeptical myself that it was indeed a "cam" and that the admins were going to be correct, but it's not a cam at all. The only thing admins were correct on is that it's not a WEBrip and had to be moved.

Fine for a watch with normal speakers or earbuds. Line audio isn't ideal, but it's very watchable.
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They got me with that "Master of the Universe" fake out movie. What a piece of crap!
 
Fucker

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Seananigans said:
Leto is a faggot but I cannot imagine he had any noticeable effect on ticket sales.
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Yeah. This is a movie for little kids, and little kids don't know who he is. Also, it was a voice only part that was pumped through a bunch of algorithms. What killed this movie is the fact that it is a nearly 50 year old dead IP. Too corny for membaberries, and no audience beyond that.
 
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jayrebb

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A movie for little kids, who don't give a fuck about He-man.

50 year olds-- who also don't give a fuck about He-man.

Oh well, we'll get em next time.
 
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Mat'hir Uth Gan

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Nothing about this movie was for kids. Absolutely nothing. Maybe it should have been tailored towards them, but it was not. This was aimed at 25-40 year olds that got kicked in the nuts by life with a message of don't give up. With probably a lean towards females since Teela was a co-main lead and the script crapped on dudes a bit. Still a really good movie. But there was no demographic for this. And the one that probably does exist, 25-40 year olds/females in that range, have no idea this movie is for them. Still think it's going to do well on streaming when people give it a chance.
 
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Phazael

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spronk said:
it was I think the first show created specifically to market toys (toys came first then show) as Reagan deregulated TV, before He Man it was basifally illegal for shows to heavily promote toys.
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I'm not sure what fucking planet you grew up on but apparently you forgot about the existence of Gobots , Transformers, mask, and oh yeah GI fucking Joe, and a million others that all came around the same time. And that's just the shit they made for boys. There were literally just as many fucking toys for girls that had cartoons made to go with them. And I don't know where you're getting the whole illegal to advertise toys on a cartoon thing from because they literally ran the ads during the fucking shows that were promoting the toys back then. And that shit goes as far back as when you used to see Bionic Man toys running ads during that show in the mid to late seventies.

Process of making a toy and then making a cartoon died out because kids got pretty fucking cynical about it or at least my generation did. But they absolutely marketed the toys in commercials during the broadcast of the same shows. And that should cut both ways because you stop seeing toys that were original ideas at the same time you stop seeing cartoons that weren't just advertisements. I think you can safely chalk it up to being another Trend that the internet rendered obsolete. Aside from Funko Pops for fagots and ponies for brownies I don't think the core that really persisted into the present. I mean there has been some weird shit done on Cartoon Network for kids but outside of stuff like Adventure Time it's not exactly something that can be marketed for toys and such. I don't recall seeing a lot of Billy and Mandy stuff or anything for Ed Edd and Eddy. Most of that seems to have shifted to online web games designed to get kids to rack up charges on their parents' credit cards. And that whole fucking scam is arguably more unethical than when they used to try sell cigarettes to kids.

As for the movie whether you hate Jared Leto or not I doubt he had any impact on the success of it. Like others have said I think it's a case of using a 40-year-old intellectual property that was largely kind of weak in the first place and had a dated fantasy feel to it even when it came out. There aren't enough of us old fucks alive to generate hype for a 200 million movie. They should have kept it to something simple cheap and well written. But Hollywood is still trying to pretend that this is the 2010s and that anything can become a cinematic franchise. Movies that make big money are very few and far between these days and they're almost all invariably original ideas done by someone who is very good at embracing the material. This movie was none of that and it was doomed from the start like a lot of other overpriced projects these days. And I don't think Kevin Smith's girl boss He-man cartoon helps drive any interest in it either.

It was a time and place kind of thing sort of like how the second Heavy Metal movie was a wet fart and any attempt to remake that nowadays would be a total fucking disaster. Some things are better just left to their era and can't really be improved upon. And even if they can be the audience is just aged out or there is otherwise not enough interest to make it successful. Two good examples I can think of of old IPS that got a remake both fell flat despite the movies being rather enjoyable at least to me were Fall Guy and Roadhouse. No matter how good those movies were made there was just no way they were going to draw enough interest to be successful. One thing the more recent Mortal Kombat movie got right is they kept their budget fairly low which means even though it was not some big Hollywood Blockbuster it probably still turn to profit. More movies need to start approaching things with that mindset or made for streaming movies are all that's going to be left, which means we won't see any movies unless the top execs at those places actually want to see the movie made.
 
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Intrinsic

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Phazael said:
I'm not sure what fucking planet you grew up on but apparently you forgot about the existence of Gobots , Transformers, mask, and oh yeah GI fucking Joe, and a million others that all came around the same time. And that's just the shit they made for boys. There were literally just as many fucking toys for girls that had cartoons made to go with them. And I don't know where you're getting the whole illegal to advertise toys on a cartoon thing from because they literally ran the ads during the fucking shows that were promoting the toys back then. And that shit goes as far back as when you used to see Bionic Man toys running ads during that show in the mid to late seventies.

Process of making a toy and then making a cartoon died out because kids got pretty fucking cynical about it or at least my generation did. But they absolutely marketed the toys in commercials during the broadcast of the same shows. And that should cut both ways because you stop seeing toys that were original ideas at the same time you stop seeing cartoons that weren't just advertisements. I think you can safely chalk it up to being another Trend that the internet rendered obsolete. Aside from Funko Pops for fagots and ponies for brownies I don't think the core that really persisted into the present. I mean there has been some weird shit done on Cartoon Network for kids but outside of stuff like Adventure Time it's not exactly something that can be marketed for toys and such. I don't recall seeing a lot of Billy and Mandy stuff or anything for Ed Edd and Eddy. Most of that seems to have shifted to online web games designed to get kids to rack up charges on their parents' credit cards. And that whole fucking scam is arguably more unethical than when they used to try sell cigarettes to kids.

As for the movie whether you hate Jared Leto or not I doubt he had any impact on the success of it. Like others have said I think it's a case of using a 40-year-old intellectual property that was largely kind of weak in the first place and had a dated fantasy feel to it even when it came out. There aren't enough of us old fucks alive to generate hype for a 200 million movie. They should have kept it to something simple cheap and well written. But Hollywood is still trying to pretend that this is the 2010s and that anything can become a cinematic franchise. Movies that make big money are very few and far between these days and they're almost all invariably original ideas done by someone who is very good at embracing the material. This movie was none of that and it was doomed from the start like a lot of other overpriced projects these days. And I don't think Kevin Smith's girl boss He-man cartoon helps drive any interest in it either.

It was a time and place kind of thing sort of like how the second Heavy Metal movie was a wet fart and any attempt to remake that nowadays would be a total fucking disaster. Some things are better just left to their era and can't really be improved upon. And even if they can be the audience is just aged out or there is otherwise not enough interest to make it successful. Two good examples I can think of of old IPS that got a remake both fell flat despite the movies being rather enjoyable at least to me were Fall Guy and Roadhouse. No matter how good those movies were made there was just no way they were going to draw enough interest to be successful. One thing the more recent Mortal Kombat movie got right is they kept their budget fairly low which means even though it was not some big Hollywood Blockbuster it probably still turn to profit. More movies need to start approaching things with that mindset or made for streaming movies are all that's going to be left, which means we won't see any movies unless the top execs at those places actually want to see the movie made.
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I mean, in his defense what you named landed pretty close chronologically. He-Man was 83, GI Joe 83, Transformers 84, Gobots 84. Technically that wouldn't disprove anything because they were a simultaneous product of the deregulation that allowed what he is saying. Ads for Slinky existed way back and the other toys I think existed prior to the show. But a 30 minute long program that was effectively an advertisement for the toys never existed until the change at the FCC occurred.

I think my mom still has pictures of me playing with my He-Man set back when I was 5. For Christmas one year (85?) I got a big Megatron that was mostly die cast metal and promptly took the whole thing apart. Got a good whooping for that and never got any more big Transformers. Pretty sure thats when they started buying me Gobots and He-Man.
 
Bald Brah

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I can't see Leto having a big impact on tickets. Sure, hes a weird freaking dude, but if his name wasn't on it you could never tell he was in this. Skeletor looked pretty good but his voice and mannerisms were not giving any tells it was leto being CGI captured. He could have been completely AI for all you could tell.

The movie really was hot garbage though. There was a lot of fighting but it was so poorly done and ridiculous that there was no way they spent even a fraction of the 200 million on choreography or enhancements. It looked like they were swinging rubber cosplay weapons at each other. No slashing damage, no blood, no realism at all. The combat was worse than stuff like the legend of hercules or xena warrior princess. It was all campy and dull, no realism. They might as well have been plastic action figures fighting. Maybe that's the look they were going for but it was really stupid.
 
Fucker

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Bald Brah said:
I can't see Leto having a big impact on tickets. Sure, hes a weird freaking dude, but if his name wasn't on it you could never tell he was in this. Skeletor looked pretty good but his voice and mannerisms were not giving any tells it was leto being CGI captured. He could have been completely AI for all you could tell.

The movie really was hot garbage though. There was a lot of fighting but it was so poorly done and ridiculous that there was no way they spent even a fraction of the 200 million on choreography or enhancements. It looked like they were swinging rubber cosplay weapons at each other. No slashing damage, no blood, no realism at all. The combat was worse than stuff like the legend of hercules or xena warrior princess. It was all campy and dull, no realism. They might as well have been plastic action figures fighting. Maybe that's the look they were going for but it was really stupid.
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8,943 pillars were destroyed in the making of this film. Those aren't cheap.
 
jayrebb

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Bald Brah said:
I can't see Leto having a big impact on tickets. Sure, hes a weird freaking dude, but if his name wasn't on it you could never tell he was in this. Skeletor looked pretty good but his voice and mannerisms were not giving any tells it was leto being CGI captured. He could have been completely AI for all you could tell.

The movie really was hot garbage though. There was a lot of fighting but it was so poorly done and ridiculous that there was no way they spent even a fraction of the 200 million on choreography or enhancements. It looked like they were swinging rubber cosplay weapons at each other. No slashing damage, no blood, no realism at all. The combat was worse than stuff like the legend of hercules or xena warrior princess. It was all campy and dull, no realism. They might as well have been plastic action figures fighting. Maybe that's the look they were going for but it was really stupid.
Click to expand...

Keep in mind a good portion of 50 year olds don't want to see him in any movie since he was cast as Joker. Suicide Squad era was DOA, and he played a part in ruining a major comic book character.

Batman DCU at the time wasn't something to play with.
 
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