Parent Thread

Noodlemod_sl said:

He's I think 10 days now. His levels are just over the "high" threshold, so they're having us bring him back this week for a follow up. They're also monitoring his weight. I've resigned to the fact that its going to take a doctor to tell her that something is wrong. I don't understand the thought process of a hormonal post partem mother, and I don't care to argue it with her anymore. Its just really bad right now. I am not having a good time. I know newborns are tough, but I know for sure he is 100% difficult than most newborns.

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Do you get to laugh in her face, and say I told you so, when after a breast feeding, you bust out the supplement bottle, and he sucks that down too? Hmm, guess he was still hungry. Oh look, he's sleeping. Sigh. I'm sorry you are dealing with this situation that is easily fixed.

Those of you heading towards kids, the best way to avoid this kind of situation is work some of this out before hand. Let her know you want to feed the baby. There are plenty of reasons as to why, least of which when they get used to the tit and mom they can be tricky to get to feed with someone else. You also want time to bond.

This solves a few things

1. You will supplement with formula and your kid won't be hungry

2. You nip the post partum shit in the bud by being involved from the start so she is never the exclusive provider of care.

3. If she puts out like a cow she'll be able to feed and pump. If not then you'll know she is only putting out an ounce a throw and won't be stupid and assume the kid is fed.

Dealing with your wife right after she's had her first kid is like a crash course in politics.

My daughter has a double ear infection and a chest infection... I haven't slept more than 6 hours in the last 48. When she isn't sleeping she is just screaming and crying and pulling at her ears and grinding her teeth and being generally miserable.

So yeah I feel you on the no sleep

Kedwyn is steering you towards potential disaster. Women are unpredictable as it is, pregnant ones are worse. Toss in post birth exhaustion plus new mother hormones plus everything else is a huge hill to climb. Having a plan is great, but the best advice is to just be patient and keep shit calm.

You won't sleep for while and your situation sounds normal dude.

Yeah I'm sure it is, just got hit hard with the early birth and a lot of things undone at the house at the same time. He also has conjunctivitis now.

Lookit you using fancy words for pinkeye.

Fatherhood has changed you man.

Draegan_sl said:

Kedwyn is steering you towards potential disaster. Women are unpredictable as it is, pregnant ones are worse. Toss in post birth exhaustion plus new mother hormones plus everything else is a huge hill to climb. Having a plan is great, but the best advice is to just be patient and keep shit calm.

You won't sleep for while and your situation sounds normal dude.

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Yeah his advice is....not a good idea. There is NOTHING you can do except take shit right now. Anybody who tells you otherwise is dumb. Take the shit and smile for a month or two.

Noodle, sneak in formula supplements on the sly, and watch your life improve drastically. Having your baby scream like you said is happening, after just an hour of sleep isn't normal. Deal with that, because your wife doesn't want to feel like a failure mother, because in her mind, if she can't produce enough milk, clearly she's a failure. Hell no. Wife can get over it, do what's best for the baby.

Draegan_sl said:

Kedwyn is steering you towards potential disaster. Women are unpredictable as it is, pregnant ones are worse. Toss in post birth exhaustion plus new mother hormones plus everything else is a huge hill to climb. Having a plan is great, but the best advice is to just be patient and keep shit calm.

You won't sleep for while and your situation sounds normal dude.

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Worked great for us, YMMV. If they are hungry, they aren't going to sleep well and neither are you. Not much you can do about colic but when the culprit is not getting enough food you have to be a nut to let it continue. Its your fucking kid not some science experiment or back yard stray cat.

Wasn't Noodle's wife the one that was stubborn as fuck through the pregnancy when she was told not to exercise or something and kept on keeping on against doctors orders or am I misremembering? Sounds like she just turned that stubbornness up to 11.
If you don't want to use formula you could always ask if there's a donor milk bank in the area. There was one about 60-90 minutes from us but when we needed it there was no way I'd stay awake long enough to make that trip there and back.

You try to bring up formula with my wife and she will slap you and wonder why you think she's a failure or if you're trying to be a duck.

The kid is getting into the two hour rhythm a bit better now. Still occasionally he will throw a hour long temper tantrum but its not all night like it used to be. My wife is producing enough as we have been pumping excess from her absolutely delicious giant milk bags. Kid is just a slow learner I guess. Actually got decent (for a newborn) sleep last night

I'm not bringing up the formula thing , letting the lactation specialist do that.

Tred you are correct, that is her. The craziest act of stubbornness was when they told her they wanted to induce her. She told th e doctor she would come in 8 hours, after she finished delivering mail by foot for the post office. Thankfully she changed her mind.

Oh that's right it she was the postal working that didn't want to take some time off.

Had my dose of WTF is going on? today as well. Wife was sobbing and saying she was so stressed by all the things she had to do. After coaxing it out of her it was determined she was stressed because she had to wash her water bottle, drink more water from said water bottle, do some milk pumping, and eat lunch. 10 minutes later everything was done or started and almost finished. Shit gets out of control so easily. lol

Crone_sl said:

Noodle, sneak in formula supplements on the sly, and watch your life improve drastically. Having your baby scream like you said is happening, after just an hour of sleep isn't normal. Deal with that, because your wife doesn't want to feel like a failure mother, because in her mind, if she can't produce enough milk, clearly she's a failure. Hell no. Wife can get over it, do what's best for the baby.

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I wouldn't sneak it in on the fly unless you're prepared to deal with "SEE I WAS RIGHT EVERYTHING IS FINE WITHOUT FORMULA!".
Noodle probably doing the right thing letting the lactation specialist take care of matters.

Draegan_sl said:

You try to bring up formula with my wife and she will slap you and wonder why you think she's a failure or if you're trying to be a duck.

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Must be them crazy hormones. Nobody is a failure for not having enough milk, nature just being a duck sometimes. Survival of the fittest amirite? If the kid starves because mom has not enough milk, population control yay.

Women.

Solution:

Duck? ... Duck!




GOOSE. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Noodlemod_sl said:

He's I think 10 days now. His levels are just over the "high" threshold, so they're having us bring him back this week for a follow up. They're also monitoring his weight. I've resigned to the fact that its going to take a doctor to tell her that something is wrong. I don't understand the thought process of a hormonal post partem mother, and I don't care to argue it with her anymore. Its just really bad right now. I am not having a good time. I know newborns are tough, but I know for sure he is 100% difficult than most newborns.

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Your baby is normal. This time will pass.

In a few months.

The Ancient_sl said:

Your baby is normal. This time will pass.

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This guy is correct. 3 children and 2 were exactly like this and the other was super premature. You are going to be fine

Kedwyn_sl said:

Worked great for us, YMMV. If they are hungry, they aren't going to sleep well and neither are you. Not much you can do about colic but when the culprit is not getting enough food you have to be a nut to let it continue. Its your fucking kid not some science experiment or back yard stray cat.

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Agree on the beforehand and post partum talk. It's what midwives and nurses teach the mothers to be here, standard practice. Breastfeeding will get up to speed. Everybody supplements. Being a parent means having your kids intrest at heart. Kids health > *, imho.