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As a side note, after dinner last night, she called her husband, and had him put the phone up to her 3 dogs one at a time so she could babytalk how much she misses them and how soon mommy will be home. It was somewhere between hilarious and terrifying for me.

Wow, so at one point she went to take a shower last night, and I hopped on here for a bit on my phone, and was super surprised. First, at the people calling B.S., I tell you all my retarded stuff, no idea why you think I would just start making shit up. There have been plenty of times where...

Weird night. So, first day of the conference yesterday I get sat next to a fairly good looking girl. We are partners for all the dumb little activities, and we have lunch together. She's 31 and while being very serious, (I kept having to follow quips up with "I was just joking there" when...

Yeah, this one actually really annoyed me, I'm guessing thats her next "plan" for trying to get me to write her back, just annoying me and hoping I'll write back with a "Go to hell" or something. So dumb. Anyway, on that note, I'm off on my work trip, where I am totally going to try and go...

Hahaha, she just emailed me the most ridiculous email. So so so so so so so dumb.

Everyone is a 1 on that scale.

Adventure Time! But yeah, it's funny, because a friend in California asked me what she was on a scale of 1 to 10, and I said "Well... I'm guessing she is like a 4-5 where you live, but thats like a 7 or 8 here." I liked her body, her face, her attitude. It was fun while it lasted, but yes...

Leaving for a 5 day work trip tomorrow, I'll see if I can't create some exciting stories while I'm out :P

Tities thread has nudes, but I blacked out the face. Here's not the best picture, but gives you an idea.

I was kind of thinking I would save that for the rerolled poster of the year contest, 2014 edition :P

I do have a 9 and a half minute video......

Uhg. I have such a hard time not responding with something simple like "Look, I don't hate you, but we are done, I'm sorry, goodbye." I know she's a crazy insane person, but uhg. I can't help feeling like I should say something, which I guess is the whole point.

I just read that quoted text, and the second line looks like something I said, and I went "What? I never said that." Just pointing out the part you clipped off was her sending me a text that said that, well, the "I" said "you", but you get the jist. The sad news is that I've yet to run back...

DO I NOT AMUSE YOU? Pay homage!

I was thinking "Harem of homeless women". Turn my house into a female only homeless shelter, payment due in the form of sex, but you get all the amenities of home, plus soup! What could go wrong?

This is so harsh, but had me nodding all the same >_<

Yeah, I'm not going to, I get it, I just like to "fix" things. I just have to keep thinking about how me trying to fix this is only going to make it messier. So, no email.

New Email! ~So hard not to respond, but I'm not responding!

Pffft, she's done with that now, she's back on match.com or whatever now :P

I swear to all that is good and holy, I'm super dad. The kids are never around any of this, and have no idea. They really, really don't. Time is split 50/50 so ALL shenanigans are done during kid free time. This is my weekend off, but what did I do at 6:30 this morning? Went and picked my 5...

Yeah, she hasn't sent anything since yesterday morning, but I'll let you know if that changes.

/shrug. I mean... it was worth this. If she was spray painting my house or something yeah, that would be terribly bad, but sending me some shitty e-mails and texts? I'm not bothered. Plus, if I aim never stick my dick in crazy, doesn't that mean no sex with women ever again? I just need...

Yeah, like I said, no more responding from me. The weird thing is that she doesn't talk like this at all in person. She's pretty well spoken, and other than occasionally throwing in something about "Well, he's a Libra, and they are very drawn to that..." or something, sounded intelligent. I'm...

I feel the need to defend myself on two points here too by the way. A.) My kid issue. He's 3 1/2 and normally when he gets upset he will just say something like "You're mean and not my best friend anymore!" and I tell him to go to his bed for time out for 5 minutes, and he does, and then he...

Let me just preface this by saying that A.) At no point did I tell her I wanted to fuck her friend Sarah, or fuck a girl from Chipotle. She asked me if I was attracted to her, and I said sure, but only in the same way I'm attracted to anyone who looks good, and that she can't see every cute...

I responded because she really was sweet, crazy but sweet. I felt bad ignoring it, so I responded. Won't happen again, she's officially burned my bridge of understand and tolerance.

When stupid easy shit is difficult. When I feel like something should be so easy that a chimp could do it and I'm struggling, especially if it causes me pain. Like trying to thread a needle and jabbing myself in the hand with it, or hammering something and bending the nail, doing it again and...

Do you seriously want me to post them all? I can, but it will take a fucking hour to read, its all insane babbling. And B.) Well, I am Onoes, so of course I responded. I sent a "I'm glad we can end this on a positive note, thanks for the apology" email last night (of course it was much...

Yeah, I woke up this morning to 8 more emails, a couple of them are probably 4-5 pages long if I was to print them. It's clear she's super sad/upset by the contents, but she's going to have to deal with it. I don't know what I can do, short of rushing over to her house and holding her and...

Ohhhh and here we go. It's almost midnight and I just got an email from her - first communication since yesterday. Here is what I'm dealing with, and again, I ONLY ever fucking worshipped this girl and smothered her with kindness and compliments. So, without further adu, her apology / attempt...

Won my first match, lost my second, waiting on the other guys to finish to see if I get 3rd or 4th in this draft. I did snag a Vampire King in the draft though, so either way, I'm already happy!

<- what about this guy?

Noodle loses the bet of us getting back together. I had a rule before I was married, that if someone hangs up on me, I'm done with them. If you can't keep your shit together enough to have a phone conversation, you are not going to be able to effectively communicate when actual shit comes up...

Yeah, I grew up with a parent who was all about guilt, that shit rolls right off me. I'm feeling totally fine. If anything, really relieved I'm not going to have to initiate this, as it was bound to "need" to happen at one point or another. She clearly wanted a lot more than I did, and I'm...

Thanks! Grabbed it sight unseen before I watched the 10 minute video. I can always use more 2 player games.

And the super nice but crazy girl just went nuts. Apparently 3-4 weeks is the length she can keep it together before flipping the fuck out. Well, it was fun while it lasted, really glad I got the kinky sex in while it was on the table! As far as what the deal was about? A few days ago I...

100% agree. A girls pussy and lube level have so much to do with it. The more friction you have, the more your cock gets gripped, the faster you cum.

Exactly. Maybe 2 days a week I get between 6 and 9 hours, and feel fine again.

My wife was "maybe" 20. Once she came, she would pressure for me to just finish fast, not in a "I want you to feel as good as me" way, but in a "I'm ready to be done now" way. This girl was still grinding on me when I dropped her off at her hour. She's texting me today about how sore she is...