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Eat carbs people. Eat lots of them.

Ossoi has an alien head.

Cause they're lazy fucks? What's not to understand?

Is that why I poop little nuggets sometimes? Ugh. The worst, feel like I need to pass a massive shit and a little guinea pig shit pellet pops out.

I don't think KC wins the #1 seed, and I don't think they make it past the first round.

poop

I don't buy the "raw" shit. I don't buy the "always cook it" either. You telling me I need to cook my kale before I throw it in my shake? Get fucked. You're telling me I can't steam my broccoli? Get fucked. Highly fucking doubt either one is going to affect you in such a way where a couple years...

He partially blocked it. If you hit the ball, you can destroy the kicker.

Case Keenum. #eliteasfuck

Best throw of Romo's career.

Sometimes I forget he played football...

Dammit Vikings... god dammit!

It was 2 years ago. We're not talking 1990 here...

Let's see. You're doing only body weight, you're advocating crunches which are possibly the worst ab workout ever thought of, and you're following a diet that forces you to consume the same thing every day? Yeah, I'm not going to bother explaining to you why this is an abysmal idea.

Mediocre 9-7 team that crushed the Falcons and Super Bowl favorite Packers before beating you and the Patriots and winning the whole damn thing? Fuck yeah, mediocre as hell.

Hey Nate, go fuck yourself. That is the worst fucking diet I've ever heard and would have anyone going insane within weeks. Also, your routine is shit as well. The fact you even mention crunches makes me want to virtually punch you in the scrotum. And Chris, if you're 6'5 and 190 pounds, you...

Why anyone drinks soda is beyond me...

No my gym only has 1 squat rack, 1 smith, and 1 incline with two flats. I want to fucking kill myself.

I thought FoH was a bunch of intelligent nerds... apparently it's just a bunch of neckbeards. My mistake.

Himeo, I think you're confused.

How is anyone confused by this? Fucking morons.

And I would sign up for it.

I love sausage, yes homo.

Hoping Knicks aren't as bad as I think they are.

Awesome, let us know when she loses her shit and destroys your restaurant.

Yeah, depends. But I agree, if you're not getting some sort of communication day to day, she's probably letting other dudes put stuff in her butt.

Am I ever serious? Except about the Hitler thing. Is that true? SOMEONE ANSWER ME!

When he was loaded trying to hit on the interviewer? Was it Suzy Kolber? Is this... is this true?

No, this one happened awhile ago. It's been what? 2 years? Since Jaws was in the booth with Chucky. Still one of the funniest things I've witnessed on MNF.

My favorite slip up is still that douchebag Jaws saying "SHIT you gotta make that catch!" and the booth going silent for a good 10 seconds.

Obesity is preventable. Cancer isn't. Am I doing it right?

Well shit, food is my #1 priority. Moving to the Midwest.

I hope he gets laid out. Biggest cunt in the NFL, funny how you can learn to hate someone so quickly. He's not even good.

2 SBs in last 6 years perhaps? One of the most important franchises for the league? NY is the capital of the world? Eli is SEXY as hell? Tom Coughlin looks awesome when he's irate on the sidelines and turns into a tomato?

Doesn't matter, just hit your macros. Obviously food is better, but such is life, do what you need to.

That's how I feel about all pizza chains. I'm not ordering it, but I'll eat yours.

NFLN or ESPN had a special where he cooked them all food at Vikings training camp. Apparently he's very good.

And miss on both of them?

DRC DID THE DEON HIGH STEP AT THE 30! LMFAO!!!

That was quite a fucking interception by Hall. Thomas gave up on it.