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Wait til she's asleep, jerk it on her face, take pics and profit/leave.

ShavenRavven should have been her name.

On a cooking note, a buddy of mine brought me a pack of beef bacon. It was delicious. It looks like it was the deckle from a beef brisket that was smoked and cured. Just in case anyone doesn't know, the deckle is the fatty lump of meat on the top of a whole brisket. I haven't seen an...

Only good things can happen from this.

I'm actually ok with that as long as he smears them with blueberry jam. I probably need help.

I love football, but I can't stomach watching the draft. It's so damn boring no matter how hard the announcers try and create drama. Actually, that's probably why I don't like it.

This confuses me. Alton says the fruit takes 42-48 hours, and jerky is only 8? Educate me, please Mr. The Master?

Fuck yeah, I'm interested. Can I send you my mailing address?

Not 100% sure, but I think it's Chrissy Teigan. Or a variation of that spelling.

We bought some Quinoa, and I cooked it up with various herbs and whatnot, but I still didn't care for it. I think it was the texture of the little grains. Anyone have a recipe for quinoa that might be better? I'll go look up this cracker thing, but I'm not sure that's the answer for my...

I stand corrected, good sir. Holy Moses.

No mention of xbockses or oxys. Who will make the call?

Maybe beef would work without heat, think dried carpaccio, but I wouldn't with pork or poultry, and I'm not sure about wild game either.

He's raping her with his eyes! That's real rape! ~Aamina

Dammit, Kuriin, you're supposed to post your tits.

This is me, too. I really like seeing the people and places he goes, and actually he seems to interact with them pretty well, especially when he's stoned. That being said, I would enjoy that show just as much with someone else as the host, I think.

I didn't skip, I watched it all. Got goosebumps again with the call and I really miss Kevin Harlan. +1 +1 +1 MAN I'M HORNY FOR FOOTBALL

Joe Buck used to be tolerable for me for a baseball game, because he basically grew up with it. But he's awful for football, and he's so over-used now I really don't care for him even on baseball anymore. For football, I love Al Michaels, Pat Summerall, and way back, I loved MNF with Cosell...

AND he's a Raider's 'fan'. Fuck that guy, Guy.

Back when we had our store, our COST for each greeting card was 17 cents. We sold them two for a buck. They weren't Hallmark, granted, but they were nice cards and printed in the U.S. Chicago specifically.

We really have never made a big deal of anniversaries (except for the 20th) or birthdays. Does he get you a card? I've forgotten that a few times, too.

I'm a salsa snob. I only eat Chilito's salsa, made and bottled and I assume sold only in Las Cruces, NM. I just looked them up, and you can order it from there, but it's $10+ per jar online. Fuck that mess, it's $5 a jar in their restaurant. But cheaper than a plane ticket, I guess.

Go home, Column, you're drunk.

My 1st anniversary was so long ago, I can't even begin to remember what the fuck I got her. Probably a bottle of wine and a slap on the ass. Next May is our 25th anniversary, and we are planning a nice vacation.

Largent was good, but he was no Don Hutson. And Hutson was really white.

I'd rather have Dalton than Mopey Dick, too. Dalton at least looks like he's trying, Cutler just looks pissed someone dragged him out of bed.

That's because Tulsa sucks, man. I'd say all of Oklahoma sucks, but OKC is definitely the pick of the litter. $5K should be a reasonable relocate fee, and if you can get them to help buy your existing home, that would be great. Go visit Tulsa if you haven't already before you move/take...

Jack in the Crack tacos are fitty cent.

You nacho cheesed them out of business, Joe.

Dat Urn.

Well, I hope we get pics of this one. And have fun, Julian.

"It eats the brussel sprouts or it gets the hose." Also, I can't believe Kuriin doesn't like mayo.

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My wife has a facebook account and I don't, should I be worried?

I topped pork loin chops with butter, panko, rosemary, garlic, onion and manchego cheese. Wow, that made an awesome crust on the chops.

I feel bad for the Netherlands. No real joy if they win, and if they lose to Brazil...

I curse them all to have Riverface forever. And regarding Pouncey, I'm not even going to read that shit because it'll just rustle me.

Cuties, the both of them, and not in a creepy way. Nice pull, Xarp.

Heh, good one.