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You're pretty much saying what cad did. Us old married guys have been out of the game too long to give good dating advice. What we can advise on is how to stay married. You're simply not asking the right questions. "You wanna skip the BJ tonight?" "No" "OK, well lets get it over with...

He hollered out the window and asked him if he was dead. Andre said he wasn't, but andre was black and you know how those darkies lie.

Took a dump so nice, that over 15 minutes later I'm still glowing.

ummm Are you sure you're her only dude? If the genders were reversed your girlfriends would be telling you that you're the side chick. Better than what happened to my wife's MTG collection. The son of the dude she used to live with burned the house down and they had no insurance. The dude...

Obviously that girl is a believer in the rule that sex comes on a certain date, so she wants to be clear the first date isn't a date. It's the only reason I can think of for not wanting to call the meetup a date.

WRONG! PEMDAS Parenthesis, Exponents, Multiply, Divide, Add, Subtract. Do it in that order and you get the ONE true answer. Fucking idiot.

it's not that easy. The studs could be anywhere from 12" to 24". Hell I think they could even be 36" in some cases (but don't hold me to that, I don't build houses). Once you figure out what your building has you can kind of use that method. Except closer to the corners they probably get...

That means autistic? I thought it mean gay. Fuck, it would be hilarious if it turned out my nephew was just autistic. I bet his husband would be devastated.

You sound like someone who sucked a dick for one between November 1993 and June 1994 (when Sega released the 32-bit add on for the genesis)

Yeah but it's still giving money to the aarp. It's a bit like saying you can suck a dick once and keep the atari jaguar for life.

It's worth a shot. Especially that first option if it actually modifies the properties of the printer. Even if it doesn't, it might still report to my computer for a split second and get captured.

This is a technology forum, so lets see if we're any good at troubleshooting. I have a printer in my office that spits out jibberish every monday at 8 AM. It's obvious that some computer on the network has a scheduled print job and is probably using the wrong print driver. I need help...

Obviously it means they fought and broke up, then got together again pretty quick. He did say future wife, so no they were not married.

The target audience is autists and autists get joy from completing menial tasks. Source: me

I'm just glad to learn there are Christian gangs in prison. I no longer worry for my butthole if they ever catch me.

yeah that's the other problem with using it to prove how much injun you have. They change it all the time.

GANGSTA DISCIPLE 4 LYFE son reppin da GEE OH DEE 360! All glory to Him!

when it comes to the injun thing, DNA doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is being on the rolls. If the ex father in law was on the rolls, then he's a full blooded indian. If not, then he's just another redneck with delusions of grandeur.