embarrassing/odd unplanned sex moments.

Evernothing

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Me and my ex were on a couch at her place, she started to unzip my pants and started to massage my dick with her mouth (she was on her side). A few moments after i thought could hold but....i couldn't and farted a little. She stopped blowing, pissed off and saying "wtf is wrong is with you?". I don't know why but i bursted out laughing.
 

Hoss

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I would laugh my ass off too, but she better keep going. I don't stop licking when a chick farts.
 

iannis

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I could see the choking thing going very bad the first time you tried it if the girl didn't like it. I'm close to getting engaged and we've done pretty much everything but that, and getting tied up. She's a "nice girl", but that hasn't stopped her from enjoying buttsecks fairly often. But choking? That might be hard to explain if she asked what the heck I was trying to do.

Maybe I can try it from behind first and just extend my fingers around towards the front more, then if if anything goes 'weird' I can just say I was massaging her neck.
biggrin.png
Just go full on choke mode, and if she wtf's you then all you do is say, "The internet told me you would like this. GOD DAMN INTERNET".

We're here to take the blame for you, bro.

Edit: I have also never choked a bitch, although I've had a couple that hinted they wanted me to. Only one that hinted in a way that I understood at the time that's what she wanted. The others it was months later when the lightbulb went off and I went, "oooh, I bet she just wanted me to abuse her". Bitch. It's not abuse if you like it. Hubris makes me hard.
 

Hoss

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Speaking of figuring things out months later .... I was once seeing a chick who I think wanted me to rape her. Woulda been a good story for this thread if I'd realized it while I was still seeing her. I saw her twice, both times I slept in her bed and we were both naked. Both times she told me to 'take care of myself' after I fingered her to an orgasm. And of course, before going to bed there was a lot of making out and heavy petting that got us both pretty revved up. At the time, I was thinking Bitch are you serious, you're not even going to give me a handy? But just went to sleep frustrated.

Then a couple months later I met this other chick on myspace who lived on the other side of the country, so we were just emailing and talking on the phone. This one straight up told me she had rape fantasies. She wanted someone to break into her room and make her gag on their cock and shit like that. I noticed a lot of similarities in their personalities. I can't remember what they all were, but it hit me like a brick wall when I realized it. Still not sure if I'd have done it if I was still seeing the first chick. I think if that's what you want, at some point, you need to tell me. Sure, I'll oblige if that's your thing. I'll show up one night unannounced and break into your apartment with a mask and everything. But tell a brother that's what you want in plain english.
 

OneofOne

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You have to be one stupid motherfucker to even CONTEMPLATE indulging in a rape fantasy in today's climate of feminazism. Oh wait, it's Hoss, carry on.
 

Jive Turkey

Karen
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Yes, all women are sluts, I'll include my mother, even if dumar won't include his. My mom married a "loser" mechanic pot head when she was 36, that drank all the time, did drugs, but god did he have a shitload of alpha qualities. He ended up cheating on her over a long period of time, got her infected with HIV and then left we for the younger woman that he was having the affair with. #yesallwomen
oops!
 

Caeden

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My ex wife did rape fantasy shit all the time. She'd start fights to get me mad then egg it on.

I didn't find it particularly arousing. I much prefer the more willingly submissive role my current gf takes.
 

Hoss

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The girl I talked to on the phone didn't want a fight (she said she would lay there and pretend to be asleep until the orgasm), and i suspect it would have been the same way for the girl I dated. I think they just wanted to get fucked and be powerless to do anything about it.

Thanks for your support 1o1, you are correct to surmise that I'm way too alpha for a feminazi to hold any power over me. But in this case, if I'd done it, at worst it might have been called date rape.
 

OneofOne

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Be as fucking alpha as you want while in the county jail bro, that'll impress all the other guys!
 

Senaiel

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Was on a 3rd date with a girl and I finally had got her in bed. Well I was fingering her and she was a squirter. Anyway, after her first orgasm or two I am still going at it with my fingers and I can really see her tensing up with her eyes rolling back. Next thing I know her body just goes completely limp. I look up and she's totally passed out. Try shaking her body a little and she won't wake up. So I get out of the bed and am wondering what the hell to do after around 15 or 30 seconds. I'm in a complete panic because after a minute she still won't wake up. Finally after about 90 seconds she came to and is asking what happened. Needless to say, she starts giving me a bj after I explained what happened. Lol.
 

Deathwing

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Was on a 3rd date with a girl and I finally had got her in bed. Well I was fingering her and she was a squirter. Anyway, after her first orgasm or two I am still going at it with my fingers and I can really see her tensing up with her eyes rolling back. Next thing I know her body just goes completely limp. I look up and she's totally passed out. Try shaking her body a little and she won't wake up. So I get out of the bed and am wondering what the hell to do after around 15 or 30 seconds. I'm in a complete panic because after a minute she still won't wake up. Finally after about 90 seconds she came to and is asking what happened. Needless to say, she starts giving me a bj after I explained what happened. Lol.
Was she really tired? Was this a common thing? Otherwise, pretty good ego booster.
 

Senaiel

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Was she really tired? Was this a common thing? Otherwise, pretty good ego booster.
Nah wasn't common. She was a vegan, so maybe she hasn't had enough protein or iron for the day. So I think once her blood got pumping she just had a wierd reaction. BTW Sean, I was posting that through my phone and it seems I forgot what I was going to write when someone walked in my office. Probably just wrapped it up without looking really at what I had put.
 

Evernothing

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I passed out / k-holed once while getting a BJ. Woke up only a few seconds later and it was pretty much the craziest thing ever.

Ever been knocked out in a fight or concussed in sports? Imagine when you come to from the blackness and no idea where to are to find out you are in your bedroom getting sucked off.

A++ would recommend.
 

OneofOne

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I'd argue that depends on the girl. For some, I preferred waking up to them riding my morning wood.