there was a string of about 5 years where i got kidney stones every year like clockwork. the first time i had no idea what was going on, i just woke up in the middle of the night feeling like i had been holding my piss all day. i sort of half sleep walking/running/hobbling went to the bathroom and nothing came out. i was extremely confused because i REALLY had to go pee but nothing was happening. i walked out of the bathroom and just basically collapsed in pain. my wife at the time called 911 and i took an ambulance to the ER. this was the most excruciating thing i've ever experienced. long story short they knew exactly what was going on from the moment the ambulance picked me up. i ended up staying in the hospital for about 4 or 5 days. they wanted me to try to pass it naturally before doing any kind of surgery, but eventually had to do lithotripsy and put in a stent in my urinary tract. after the surgery the dr said he wanted me to notify a nurse when i felt ready to try to go to the bathroom. that was literally all he said to prepare me.
so a few hours later i called the nurse, she calmly came over and helped me get to the bathroom (i had IV's all over and whatnot). i assumed the dr wanted me to call the nurse so that i didn't trip on any tubing or something. i went to the bathroom, closed the door, felt a bit of a sting down below, but i assumed that was natural because of the surgery. i was on morphine and fentanyl so i just sort of braced myself and closed my eyes because i was getting a little bit of vertigo. i did my business and it hurt, but not terribly. when i was done i opened my eyes and i REALLY wish someone would have prepared me for what i was seeing. it looked like someone had just been violently murdered. blood EVERYWHERE. like, a scary amount of it. thankfully the nurse was waiting and she heard my shocked and panicked mumbling. she asked if everything was okay and i'm pretty sure all i could get out was "uuuuhhh help"
she was like, yes that is totally normal. the next few times you urinate it will be bloody but it will be significantly less and less, so don't worry, you're doing great.
it was truly terrifying. every once in a while i think back and shutter.
anyway, blood for the blood gods.
