Heh so the chick I play WoW with deleted her char (raid equipped 80 priest) and we had it out this past Saturday. I like her so much, it"s been tearing me up inside the past week I"ve already sent way too many texts and yet, I still can"t stop thinking about her. I"ve been crazy about her for over a year.
She is with another guy so I even forced myself to stop talking to her for 2 months (mid dec -> mid feb) but in the back of my mind I knew she would immediately pick up if I ever called her again so it wasn"t as hard and I still talked to her when we played WoW. I awkwardly ignored her when I saw her out and I know she would ask my friends where I was to try to find me out although she claims to have never liked me, not even as a friend now.
We used to talk for hours on the phone and anytime I invited her out she would go, usually just the two of us. We were hanging out long before we started playing WoW together but now she is texting me that she was simply using me for a free WoW account (I was paying for it) and she got rid of me after no longer wanting to play. She deleted the char so I couldn"t use it as she is picky about that stuff. We actually talked quite a bit after she deleted the char but the catalyst was that a few days later I went and had her char undeleted by a GM and told her best friend before I told her. When she found out, I got a text saying fuck off and lose my number. I mishandled that situation when she wouldn"t answer my phone and left a message telling her to stop being a whiny bitch about it.
For a few days we argued about the char, then it turned into more. I"ve kind of been doing crappy shit to her over the past few months (ignoring her, and when I did talk to her I insulted her a few times). I think I was doing it subconsciously because I could not stop thinking about her or talking to her for months and she was with another guy. I couldn"t move on. I told her I liked her on many occasions but she never gave me closure (never said I don"t like you), just went with it. I think she didn"t want to piss me off or hurt my feelings. So I"m pressing for it even more, and probably annoying her in the process because I simply wanted closure. I"d make comments about her looks in a mean way, I always called her boyfriend a douchebag which I knew pissed her off. That went on for like 4 months.
With the char undeletion thing setting it all off, she slowly started pouring more salt on the wound and tearing into me about the other stuff which honestly I didn"t do on purpose, I was doing it because I couldn"t stop thinking about her and couldn"t get over her. I think I was trying to piss her off. We had a long argument in texts where we bitched each other out, her more then me as I tried laying off until it got to the point she was fed up and just told me to stop fucking texting her. The next day I apologized in kind of a pathetic sappy way through e-mail and through text which she never responded to at all and that"s where it is at now.
I kind of pushed her to that point and yet, I"m fucking miserable that I can"t call her. She was absolutely amazing in every way, one of the nicest girls I know but I also know she holds a grudge like none other and she had to be pushed quite a bit to get to this point. I"m worried I"ll never get to talk to her again and it"s tearing me up. Everything I did revolved around her, going out, talking on the phone, playing WoW etc. If I called her, ANYTIME, she would either answer or text that she would call me back asap. She always looked out for me and was always nice to me. Her text stating she never considered me a friend tore me up badly although I can"t see how that"s true at all, probably just how she feels now and I lost my will to even log into WoW. Even when I"m in game it always reminds me of her and I"m completely miserable
Fucking A this royally sucks. The last girl I truly liked was about 4 years ago. I rarely ever fall for chicks and I fell for my best friend that had a boyfriend and apparently never felt the same way about me. Makes me such a douchebag, especially how I treated her because I was incapable of coping with my feelings. Mippo persona aside I"m quite popular in real life and HATE people being mad at me, it drives me crazy. The fact that I like her so much and knowing *I* caused these problems is eating me up. I wish I could"ve been better at dealing with my feelings and backed off without pissing her off or in an awkward way (ignoring her for 2 months in a row for no reason). Right now I just think back to how just 2 weeks ago she came to my work and chilled with me simply to keep me company, how she used to ask about me all the time, how she always answered my texts or returned my phone calls, how she was always there for me when I needed her etc and it pains me inside to know that"s gone, probably forever but at least for a few months. The irony is that since I always went to her with my major problems I have nobody reliable to go to with this. Everything I do now makes me think about her. It"s probably, in the long run, for the best since she claims to have never liked me and this is the only way I am going to get over her and move on but fuck it hurts in the meantime. I understand the moving on part, I"ve been trying to do it for months, what gets me the most is the fact that this happened on her terms and not mine.
Yay, I finally get to contribute to this thread in a real fashion.
