Girls who broke your heart thread

I always thought the punctured condom thing was a myth. Jesus.

Need some advice my dear FoH companions. Not so much for my own relationships, but my role in someone elses drama here.

The backstory:

I"ve worked with this guy, Kenny, for nearly a year. He"s an all right dude, and has been married to this chick we"ll call Casey for the past 10 years.

Casey has been married twice before Kenny, and has two kids, one with each of the previous husbands but none with Kenny. She"s one of those types that acts like everything in the world is wrong with her so she draws a disability check and runs around all day spending Kenny"s money, which he pretty much uses solely to care for her and her kids. Despite this, the motherfucker is happy as a clam. Never complains about spending the money on her or the kids, never whines when he has to go pick the kids up from school or any of that. On top of all this, Casey isn"t even hot, not even decent, so I mean, fuck.

Anyway, fast forward to recently:

They are partying, both drunk and high, and somehow Casey lets something slip like "there was that one time..." Yeah, it turns out she cheated on Kenny a couple years back. For whatever reason, he begins to pry and the bitch just spills it that she has cheated multiple times since they"ve been married. I don"t know why this came as a surprise to Kenny, because the former two husbands divorced her for this very thing.

So all that blows up and Kenny tells her to gtfo by the end of the week. This creates a drama bomb explosion, especially with the kids. As said before, they"ve been married 10 years so the kids have mostly grown up with Kenny as their dad.

They separate for awhile, and all this time I"m telling Kenny that he"s doing the right thing by just telling her to fuck off. Get out of there, the kids aren"t his anyway and even if he"s attached he can"t let that keep him in a relationship like that (maybe wrong advice? I don"t know.) This is also because of something she did involving me, more on that later.

So he takes my advice and stays away for awhile, but goes into a spiraling depression and just generally fucks his life up, including getting fired from where we worked. He"s just in a bad, bad spot.

Here"s where my problem comes in. The last time I talked to him he said he was trying to reconcile with Casey. I asked how that started and he told me she promised him that what happened was years and years ago (something like 5 years ago) and that she hasn"t cheated on him or even thought about it since then because she"s happy and realized it was a mistake. He totally bought into all this and they are now living together again.

My issue? I know for a fact she has cheated on him not only over the past few years, but even within the last couple of months. She even tried to cheat with me, and I have text messages saved on my phone to prove it. I wouldn"t mind showing these to him, because I declined and defended him in the messages, saying I would never do that to a friend. I didn"t show these messages to him previously before now because I didn"t want to get involved and it seemed like he was getting out of the bad relationship anyway. All good. But now, he"s getting right back in for more abuse.

My question to you, noble FoHers, is is there any point in showing him or telling him about it now? It"s clear he WANTS to be back with her even if it"s fucking dumb, but a big part of his reasoning he gave me for actually doing so is what she told him, that she hadn"t cheated in years. It just irks me that she"s manipulating him so easily.

However, a few things to consider:

Casey is a crazy bitch who knows where I work, where I live, what I drive, etc. If she realized I was the ultimate reason he left her for good, she could seek retaliation. I"m not worried for my physical person, but I did just get a new car...

Second, even if I do tell him, is it going to matter in his head? He"s looking for excuses to take her back, maybe I should just let it happen and leave things be?

Kenny doesn"t work with me anymore and wont be coming back, so these people could just fade out of my life, but while he did work here we became decent friends and I do feel some sense of loyalty. I hate seeing her take advantage of him when he"s been providing for her and her kids for 10 fucking years.

Bitches like that just infuriate me. So, what would you guys do?

Definitely tell him. He"s probably holding onto a tiny glimmer of hope that she changed and you"ve got definite proof that conflicts with that.

Tell him for nothing else than to leave that shitty cancerous bitch on a limb.

I"d say if Kenny is already fading out of your life, just let it be. You don"t need that kind of drama. However, if you do start feeling guilty for letting it slide, I say think of the car and all shall be well.

go forth noble paladin and spread truth where there were lies.
Just make sure that when you drop the truth bomb on him, you also set up a time within 2 weeks (or whatever you feel is right) to meet up and talk things over.
I"m just saying you gotta follow through. last thing you want is for him to isolate himself and become more depressed than before. I"m sure you have a better idea of what"s appropriate. good luck.

ps. main argument for getting involved: you"d hope someone would do the same for you.

I"m basically working under the presumption that he can"t work out some sort of deal with Kenny about no name dropping. If it is possibly, however, then by all means, stick it to the bitch.

EDIT: My main point was - YOU come FIRST. As far as I can tell, this hasn"t been some spectacular friendship that would have lasted a lifetime. There"s no need to risk as much as you are potentially risking on this.

Naw, he"ll just blame you for it. Stay out of stupid people"s drama.

Eomer said:

I always thought the punctured condom thing was a myth. Jesus.

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Actually something both guys and girls do, and as far as tricking someone into conception it isn"t that uncommon a strategy. Though "the condom slipped off" is probably more common for guys.

OhSeven said:

So, in the original spirit of the thread, I actually discovered I have a limit for crazy. I love crazy for the most part as I figured out how to control and focus it...or so I thought.

I"ll try to keep this as brief as possible. Girl who I"ve been with for years has been suggesting that we fuck bareback for about a month or so now. I don"t play that regardless of how good it might or might not feel. In fact I"ve never had sex without a condom, nor do I blow my load inside even WITH the condom on. Call it cautious or what have you, but that"s just what I do.

So her sudden urging of this set off alarm bells, but I kept seeing her. She kept at it for almost two weeks then just suddenly stopped. I was thankful at first, but then my paranoia took over. Earlier today, while over at her place, I inspected the condoms that we keep over there. Every one of them had a pin hole poked in the center of it.

I was angry, I immediately confronted her about it. I told her it was over, calmed her down when she started crying, Told her I loved her for the first time (I think) and left.

Pretty bummed out about all of this.

Didn"t know it was coming to this, so sorry folks, no FoHSS on tits from me.

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You have been with the same chick for "years" and you never told her you love her? I find this interesting coupled with the liking crazy bitches.

Remember Grave, ignorance is bliss. He sounds like an idiot and if he fucked his life up the first time what will he do the 2nd time?

Eomer said:

I always thought the punctured condom thing was a myth. Jesus.

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Ditto, I never heard of it actually happening. That"s SO fucked up.

Grave said:

My question to you, noble FoHers, is is there any point in showing him or telling him about it now? It"s clear he WANTS to be back with her even if it"s fucking dumb, but a big part of his reasoning he gave me for actually doing so is what she told him, that she hadn"t cheated in years. It just irks me that she"s manipulating him so easily.

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If you call yourself his friend, it is your duty to tell him the absolute truth about things like that. Don"t speculate about whether he will or won"t be rational about it. That"s not for you to worry about. Whether he uses the info or not, or hates you for telling him, is irrelevant. If he is your friend, it"s your obligation to let him know. You are a shitty friend if you don"t tell him something that big.

Grave said:

Bitches like that just infuriate me. So, what would you guys do?

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Now this is a very good question. We"ll start off with the facts given;
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
She"s a cheating whore.

She"s a manipulative, cheating whore.



Your boy Kenny is dumb.

Your boy Kenny has self esteem issues.


You are a good enough person to give support.

You are a good enough person to keep your dick away from the cheating whore.


Now! Given this, there is only one option. You must first go to the store, any pharmacy or store should carry baby powder. Not just any baby powder, but Gold Bond brand baby powder. This is because in a time like this, you must never go cheap. Once you have acquired your baby powder, call your friend Kenny up. Tell him you want to talk and go over some things in regards to the cheating whore. Make it a comfortable place, maybe a coffee or a dinner. Be kind to him, as he is probably very fragile and unsure why you would want to talk to him after he"s in such a self made pit of depression. Be supportive, try and say nice things. When you"ve had your coffee or food, and the meal is over and the time to talk has come here is where you man the fuck up. Spread out everything you know, lay it out and explain exactly where she has been lying and give supporting evidence. He probably won"t believe it because what he hasn"t told you is he has already gone back to her and her vagina has raped his mind like an illithid. This is why you got the baby powder, because while he was giving his excuse, you were getting ready for your response. As soon as he finishes whatever bullshit excuse she planted in his mind (INCEPTION) pull your freshly powdered hand back and slap the dumb out of him. I"m not talking a half hearted tap, I"m talking a full on bitch better give me my money kind of slap. Now this is a tricky execution, but if done proper it will work. See most people aren"t used to being slapped, and the brain naturally shuts down and reboots after a solid slap. People all of the sudden realize, "HEY! I DUN GOOFED!" If this fails to work the first time, repeat as necessary. The result is either the common sense you are dropping on him will catch or his balls will drop. If he can"t man up you have to man the fuck up for him.


tl;dr: Do this to him.
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
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Grave said:

Bitches like that just infuriate me. So, what would you guys do?

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If you consider him a friend, then...

a) Tell him the truth.

b) Dont let him suffer alone if he cannot handle it, help him enjoy life without her.

c) He sounds like he has trouble actually getting girls, so he is happy that he got that one at least. Help him with some basic game when going out and he should be fine once he gets more vagina that isnt psycho mum. More vagina solves many issues, it is like super-medicine.

d) Maybe he isnt that stupid and knows that she is lying and that she will cheat again, but is okay with it somehow -- and you destroying his justification to stay with her fucks everything up.


If he is just "some guy" you dont care about, then tell him the truth or not depending on how much you dislike that bitch.

Grave said:

Bitches like that just infuriate me. So, what would you guys do?

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Dont tell him shit, he obviously knows she is a sheisty whore regardless of what he admits in public. You bringing this up AFTER they have hooked back up is a bit low class. Unless you plan to rewire him from the ground up not to be a bitch there is not much you can do.

He was happier before, the kids were happier. Disgusting situation, whatever.

If you told him once its not going to do any good the second time even with proof, just make sure he knows your position is she"s a cheating whore with no chance of recovery so you can say i told you so in a couple of years when she leaves him because he"s a tool that lets himself get cheated on.

Grave, you wouldn"t be telling the guy anything he didn"t know.

I"d be a sounding board, and give advice. I would not get involved, and wouldn"t mention his skanklet hit on you.

I think even if you did tell him, he"d ignore it because fucked up or not she makes him happy.

However, a phone with a camera snapping anonymous videos of a tramp in action being posted in a public forum would be perfectly legit, and might give the poor guy the closure he needs.

Dabamf said:

If you call yourself his friend, it is your duty to tell him the absolute truth about things like that. Don"t speculate about whether he will or won"t be rational about it. That"s not for you to worry about. Whether he uses the info or not, or hates you for telling him, is irrelevant. If he is your friend, it"s your obligation to let him know. You are a shitty friend if you don"t tell him something that big.

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I think it really depends on the depth or scale of the friendship. People have varying depths of friendship with people. There"s your "boys" who know everything about you, and you have zero secrets from. You"ve probably known them since childhood, or at least 5-10 years. If he"s one of those, then yes, you"re obligated to dive the fuck in and try to right that ship because there"s a very good chance things will go sideways again even if you don"t intervene.

But from what you"re saying, this guy isn"t one of those. He"s a former workplace friend, and it sounds like it wouldn"t be a huge loss if you never saw him again. I think in that case, I"d back off. You"re not close enough to stick your nose in to his marriage. He may well just end up resenting you for it. Hell that could happen with one of your "boys" too, but manliness requires you risk it. But again in this case considering that you"re not very close with the guy, and the bitch might come after you in one way or another, I"d stay out of it.

Shitty situation, to be sure.

Grave said:

She even tried to cheat with me, and I have text messages saved on my phone to prove it.

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What do the messages say? Why does she even have your cell #? If I were in this situation, I tell him she"s a lying whore and here"s the proof. He"ll either say "Ok", not care and continue to get cheated on (which sure as shit he will), or he"ll go into a frenzy and come to his senses and get rid of her and move on.

Eomer said:

But from what you"re saying, this guy isn"t one of those. He"s a former workplace friend, and it sounds like it wouldn"t be a huge loss if you never saw him again. I think in that case, I"d back off. You"re not close enough to stick your nose in to his marriage. He may well just end up resenting you for it. Hell that could happen with one of your "boys" too, but manliness requires you risk it. But again in this case considering that you"re not very close with the guy, and the bitch might come after you in one way or another, I"d stay out of it.

Shitty situation, to be sure.

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This is correct and is definitely part of my dilemma. I worked with him and we got along well, but he"s not someone I hang out with regularly or even see anymore now that we aren"t working together. My only contact with him is IMing. That said, I still hate holding info that could wake this guy up and get him out of a bad situation. Yet I agree with you that he may just end up more miserable and resent me for even bringing it up. Hell, he may even be totally illogical and somehow partially blame me for her trying to cheat, even though I never gave the bitch a second glance.

mattsb84 said:

What do the messages say? Why does she even have your cell #? If I were in this situation, I tell him she"s a lying whore and here"s the proof. He"ll either say "Ok", not care and continue to get cheated on (which sure as shit he will), or he"ll go into a frenzy and come to his senses and get rid of her and move on.

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My number was in her phone because of a period he went without a cell and used hers if he needed to get up with people. It was just left in there after he got his own back and she later used it to contact me one night. The messages are just what you"d expect, she was asking me what I was doing and if I was alone, asked if she could come over, you know the drill.

At first I just tried to keep things friendly. It went something like:

"Haha. I don"t think Ken would appreciate that."
"What he doesn"t know wont hurt him."
"Sorry, I wouldn"t do that to Ken."
"Come on. I"m bored and horny. Take me for a ride and we"ll do it in your car."
"I"ve got enough ladies to worry about as is."
"But I can"t have fun because I"m married?"

And I stopped responding at that point. She sent a few more like "Am I coming or not?" as if she didn"t get the fucking point. I actually haven"t talked to her at all since then. I just ignored any texts she sent after that night.

Anyway...

To give you guys an update on the situation, I was actually leaning towards telling him today when we were talking on IM, but he immediately launched into a new development.

He told me he walked by her PC this morning and saw a chat thing flashing. She was gone so he decided to sit down and see who it was. It was some guy he had never heard of. He decided to act like he was her and talk with the dude, although he didn"t want to give himself away so he didn"t outright ask for information. Eventually the guy said something like, "I may be looking to get into a little trouble tomorrow." Kenny responded with "Where?" because he thought that was the safest response without giving himself away. The guy said, "I guess my place as usual if that"s cool, doesn"t matter."

At that point he said he just shut it off and has been stewing over it. I think he should"ve pressed a bit more for info, but oh well. Anyway, he"s currently planning on telling her about the chat as soon as gets home today (humorously enough she"s probably out somewhere cheating right now...where the fuck to unemployed white trash chicks go all day anyway?) and he wont let me talk him out of going that route.

All the same, I feel like this might be a bad time to drop the text thing on him. There"s no way I can do it without him telling her. As much as he doesn"t want this to be true, if it is he"s going to rub it in her face. That"s just how he is. So as someone said earlier, I can"t tell him without name dropping occurring later. She is going to know I said something if I do. I"m willing to man up and take any potential retaliation I guess if it really means the best for Kenny, but at this point I"m not convinced. It"s almost like the dude wants to wallow in this drama.