Girls who broke your heart thread

So date with Nora clarified some things. She is emotionally unavailable. We had fun together, looks like we can just stay activity buddies.

Lilly called me today and asked me when I am free again. I told her I am never free, I am very expensive, but I may be free next sunday, but just for her.

Jenny wants to go out on saturday night and told her friends she is planning on taking me home... We actually had a pretty good time together and since Nancy is basically out of the picture and everyone is pushing me onto Jenny anyway, I may as well see where that goes. I really did not give her much of a fair chance.

(No that is not just me justifying my change of perception) So anyway, we see how that goes.

That reminds me, I have to speak with the security guards at my apartment about discussing things they will end up seeing on the cameras... they shouldn"t be talking about anything they see on there right? (not doing anything illegal, but I just don"t feel like having a bunch of gossip because a douche bag couldn"t stop from jerking off about me bringing a hot girl home with me)

Falling into livejournal mode here

Sabrina is packed and filing for divorce. He"s been cheating and the girl he screwed texted Sabrina a pic of him passed out naked. :O

Relevant:

Nice a Holiday Pool Party for women to cheat on their husbands while they"re at war.

Haha that has to be the worst idea ever.

Don"t talk to your superiors that way bitch app.

Ravvenn said:

Sabrina is packed and filing for divorce. He"s been cheating and the girl he screwed texted Sabrina a pic of him passed out naked. :O

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No surprise there, he"s likely been cheating for years. Sucks the kids will lose their surrogate dad.

Tina is taking them all in. They"ll be changing states/schools which will suck, but they"re used to it. Getting them out of a hostile environment is best for them, anyway.

Sabrina is taking this well, she really meant what she told us. She demanded therapy before walking, so she could say she tried. She did, and she walked. She sounds so...happy! It"s weird. I expected devastation after having to see something, but I guess knowing all along took some of the power away from the hit she received.

She"s upset it"s Christmas time. He"s the breadwinner. Even though he gets extra money from the military to provide for her and the kids, he"s keeping it. So she can"t get them gifts. I planned to give her any money I get for Christmas from family members to get them something, even though it will be after the holiday. Poor kids.

Ravvenn said:

Even though he gets extra money from the military to provide for her and the kids, he"s keeping it. So she can"t get them gifts. I planned to give her any money I get for Christmas from family members to get them something, even though it will be after the holiday. Poor kids.

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Tell her ass to call his first shirt and let him know what"s up. That money isn"t for him to get extra cash, it"s for him to provide for military dependents. He is actually breaking some pretty major rules about it if he doesn"t give her that money and provide for them.

first shirt = First Sergeant

Vatoreus said:

Tell her ass to call his first shirt and let him know what"s up. That money isn"t for him to get extra cash, it"s for him to provide for military dependents. He is actually breaking some pretty major rules about it if he doesn"t give her that money and provide for them.

first shirt = First Sergeant

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She knows all of that. They even provide him with extra money and a small place to stay in the event of marital problems / divorce. She wouldn"t tell on him, I"m pretty sure he"s put fear into her to prevent that from ever happening. He drives a brand new Hummer. She has an older VW bug that has a broken heater, this is what she takes her kids to school in (they"re in the Midwest). She asked to use his car the other day to take one kid to the doctor, he told her to fix the heater herself. :O I know he"s a Sergeant, and he has some important ranking. I"m kind of a military retard, though. She"d mentioned having to leave out details in counseling, like when he pushed her, because since it"s the therapist provided through the military, they"d have to report it which would get him in big trouble for any type of physical violence so she never told them.

Ravvenn said:

She knows all of that. They even provide him with extra money and a small place to stay in the event of marital problems / divorce. She wouldn"t tell on him, I"m pretty sure he"s put fear into her to prevent that from ever happening. He drives a brand new Hummer. She has an older VW bug that has a broken heater, this is what she takes her kids to school in (they"re in the Midwest). She asked to use his car the other day to take one kid to the doctor, he told her to fix the heater herself. :O I know he"s a Sergeant, and he has some important ranking. I"m kind of a military retard, though. She"d mentioned having to leave out details in counseling, like when he pushed her, because since it"s the therapist provided through the military, they"d have to report it which would get him in big trouble for any type of physical violence so she never told them.

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What a piece of shit. I will never understand men who behave this way -- any of it. Maybe if you grew to hate your wife (re the vehicle and money, not the violence), but when there are kids involved...

Vatoreous is correct on calling the 1SG but obviously her safety is a concern here.

Does anyone else"s girlfriend call them just to complain and vent? Like not even about anything relating to you nor your relationship just various crap? What exactly am I supposed to do during these phone calls? I"ve learned throughout my years on the planet that trying to say they"re overreacting or this is immature isnotthe route but I don"t want to just sit here agreeing with them. Ravv, what do you expect out of these phone conversations?

Tenks said:

Does anyone else"s girlfriend call them just to complain and vent? Like not even about anything relating to you nor your relationship just various crap? What exactly am I supposed to do during these phone calls? I"ve learned throughout my years on the planet that trying to say they"re overreacting or this is immature isnotthe route but I don"t want to just sit here agreeing with them. Ravv, what do you expect out of these phone conversations?

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I"ve always, always fucked this one up. Almost every girl I"ve ever dated has told me they think I"m lecturingthemwhen they do this. It"s not like I call them stupid or anything, but apparently trying to calm someone down, work towards a solution, or just say "it"ll be okay" is not the thing to do.

I"m just not someone who typically goes on unproductive rants. If I"m pissed about something, I"m trying to find a way to fix it. That"s not been the case with any girl I"ve ever known. They just want you to listen, be angry when they"re angry, and don"t try to help anything.

edit: Ravvenn, whether it gets him in trouble or not your friend should report domestic violence, and if he"s keeping money that is supposed to go to her then he"s breaking a boatload of laws. The military gets a bad rap sometimes because of douches like this guy, and if she"s letting him get away with it then she"s enabling him and every other enlisted man like him to continue serving dishonorably. If she"s fearing for her safety, report that too. The Army doesn"t play around in these sorts of cases. It"s not easy to work up the courage to do that, but if you can help her, you should.

Heylel Teomim said:

They just want you to listen, be angry when they"re angry, and don"t try to help anything.

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Nail on the head.

I"ve had this happen with any girl I"ve ever been with. Even my wife will do this from time to time. They just want to get it out. You just need to agree or really appear to listen. And you gotta actually face them and just sit there and nod your head and take little notes. They will know if you are half ass listening and staring at the computer screen. "You weren"t even listening!" "Yes I was!" "What did I just say then?" "Uh..."
When women start blabbering on, a guy will naturally just start solving their problem for them, but that will only make them angry. They don"t want a solution. In conclusion: women are nuts.

I don"t know who said it so I can"t give props, but it was on FoH:

While she"s talking, wait for a break in her whining and repeat the last phrase she said. For example "...and she"s a total bitch!!!!" You say: "So she"s a total bitch?" passively and with the right intonation. Then she"ll go off for another 2-5 minutes about something. Just keep repeating the ends of sentences as questions and act mad at the right time.

Works like a charm.

I"m not sure you"re qualified to give relationship advice.

Aamina said:

I don"t know who said it so I can"t give props, but it was on FoH:

While she"s talking, wait for a break in her whining and repeat the last phrase she said. For example "...and she"s a total bitch!!!!" You say: "So she"s a total bitch?" passively and with the right intonation. Then she"ll go off for another 2-5 minutes about something. Just keep repeating the ends of sentences as questions and act mad at the right time.

Works like a charm.

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I"m not sure how to do exactly the opposite of this