Girls who broke your heart thread

Ravvenn_sl

shitlord
14
0
Voyce said:
Yes, or maybe something more subtle like, "As long as he"s down with us fucking."


We"ll have to compile a thesis at some point of all the data that has been collected over time here.
I hate to say it, but I"d encourage this over the former (which if read wrong, could peg you as being controlling). I"d be more responsive to this line, but I have a pretty vulgar sense of humor.

You guys already know you"re over-thinkers. The main problem you have is being extremists with things. You get the advice, and take it to the extreme. Whether it"s being romantic (the box), or being a dick (punching her in the cunt). There has to be a fine line between both, and it depends on the female when it comes to which side you need to lean towards. This may blow your mind, but we are all not created equal.

A few things on her would have worked on me, or at the very least gotten my left tit out of my shirt. Some of the other things? I"d have rejected the dude as loudly as possible just to spite him for using a fucking book tip on me. Like that Mystery dude, if he walked up to me in a bar, I"d have introduced him to my gay friend...because he looks gay. I don"t even wear that much eyeliner. I don"t care how fucking slick you are, don"t be (or look like) a douche.

We see you before you get the balls to open your mouth. That"s where you need to start, find something that looks good on you. Don"t have your hair in a side-part gelled down to your melon. It doesn"t make the female shallow to look at what you"re wearing first, but what it does do is make us note that you give a shit about yourself/your appearance, and may be less prone to look likesheknockedyouup in 3-5 years. It"s also going to boost your confidence, which when you are, you really don"t need to do much; it"s obvious when a man is confident. It"s even more obvious when you"re insecure, and that is very unattractive.

Don"t be too dickish and wash away all of the bitches who have FZ"d you. Keep the one you"d like to nail/marry/whatever. Use her to bounce things off of. This is beneficial for a few reasons. The first reason is so that you have someone with a vagina on-call to get advice from, the second reason is because new girls will naturally see her as competition (we"re all bitches at the end of the day), the last reason is just in case she is the jealous type, you may have a teeny tiny chance at making the FZ chick want to jump back in the competition (don"t count on it, though - you have a better chance of making a grilled cheesus, but it isn"t unheard of).

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This is oftentimes so bizarre to read (as a female), it"s like a morbid peek into the male mind and has honest to God, took a giant shit on everything I ever thought of men. Some of the posts contain the worst advice I"ve ever seen, others have things that would likely get at least one of you in my pants (well, one has been, so let"s say two), and a few are simply endearing and make me want to hug (and immediately friend zone) the OP"s.

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Salshun,

What you posted is pretty messed up. Why did you put up with that, man? That seriously made me sad to read. I"ve been in my fair share of "abusive" relationships, but I would never put up with that. I have only been in a slightly similar position, where despite asking countless times, I never got to go out anywhere. I haven"t had the friends of my SO ever treat me like shit. Family? Oh hells yes! But never friends. Most of (all of) my exes friends end up trying to get it in after we split, since they all value the bro-code so much, anyway. But I guess that"s much different for men and women. You have portrayed yourself as a pretty confident dude, so I can"t fathom why or HOW you were able to tolerate that. What she did to you was beyond being a cunt, that was cruel. That"s coming from a full-blown r-tard who puts up with a LOT of stupid shit, too.

I"m sorry, broseph.


--------------------
I"m might make another post. I was thinking about finding a way to post some of the messages from my dating profile thingy. I just can"t find the time to do it. It may be fun (or at least entertaining) to have you guys decode them. I also have a few dates lined up over the next two weeks, should be weird since I"m no longer in California. My dad of all people, called me last night to ask if I would mind if he introduced me to someone. That"s really weird, and he must be a really amazing dude to get his approval. I"m his baby, and I"ve had to beg him to not go shoot someone before (I"m from the Midwest, after all, heh). My dad still adores one of my exes, and totally sided with him once during a fight (which was rare, and the first time I ever went to my dad for advice since I suspected I was overreacting). I"d never agree to anyone my mom picked. She once set me up with a vegetarian who only ate vegetables from a can. I"m a "meat & taters" type of girl. I"d rather die than eliminate steak from my diet, and I"d also rather buy fresh vegetables than get them from a can. Plus, this dude was so abnormally thin I"d end up having to protect him if we were ever put in that position. :O
 

The Ancient_sl

shitlord
7,386
16
A guy will try any method to get in your pants.

Decrazified

Personally I don"t wanna see this shit. It usually makes me cringe and the OP won"t be here to make fun of so what"s the point?
 

Voyce

Shit Lord Supreme
<Donor>
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I didn"t realize PigBenis was trying to get with Rav, or that Rav was good at hacking the sack.





Also everyone in this thread hopefully by now, knows not to take a females advice on dating, right?

Just nod your head and pretend your listening.
 

Dabamf_sl

shitlord
1,472
0
Im psychic so I can decode all messages before reading them
"you"re pretty" = I bet if I act nice and compliment her she will have sex with me
"I like your interests, I also play squash in my free time" =I bet if we have the same hobbies she will have sex with me
"I also have kids" = I usually lie about this, but since she has kids we can relate and I bet she will have sex with me
"I hate your profile" = I bet if I"m mean while everyone else is nice she will have sex with me
"I like cheese" = I bet if she thinks I"m quirky and strange saying random things like that she will have sex with me
"I"m not a rapist" = I bet she"ll think I"m funny and will have sex with me so I don"t have to resort to rape this time

I prefer payment by PayPal so that you can rescind payment after the fact and I have no repercussions whatsoever
 

Ravvenn_sl

shitlord
14
0
Dabamf said:
"I like your interests"
I got one by someone who was the first 99% "enemy" that sent me a message. I replied pointing out that all of our mandatory answers were complete opposites (he insisted on a Christian, obviously due to what I just said, his views on homosexuality and gay marriage differed from mine, he didn"t shower every day, hated dogs, etc.). He messaged me back saying that his "friend" filled out his profile while he was drunk. I told him I couldn"t date a pussy who"d roll over on his beliefs for a piece of ass.

I have gotten some really awesome messages that I enjoyed reading, and talking to the guys. They"re few and thousands of miles between, but were quality messages. I reply to 1-2 messages every 3-6 months and they"re always the messages that are witty, didn"t use "text speak" (hi how r u ths wknd), and the guys who took the time to fill out their profile AND add (recent) pictures.

I never know which pictures to use. I try to use pictures that are worse than how I look when dolled up, so that way if by some freak chance I do meet someone, I"ll look better instead of worse (it made sense in my head at the time).
 

001001102

Silver Knight of the Realm
353
108
Gaige said:
WTF is going on!? I thought Rav and Furor were married =x
Bro, I was about to attack you for being a tranny in the GWBYHT, but then I realized that was Glaive and you"re Gaige. Anyway, that Wakandan was with der fuhrer, as it were, iirc. Not married, but living together or something, I believe. Anyway, some shit went down, and now she and EP are totally gettin" hitched in Vegas or some shit. For reals.
 

Tenks

Bronze Knight of the Realm
14,163
606
001001102 said:
Bro, I was about to attack you for being a tranny in the GWBYHT, but then I realized that was Glaive and you"re Gaige. Anyway, that Wakandan was with der fuhrer, as it were, iirc. Not married, but living together or something, I believe. Anyway, some shit went down, and now she and EP are totally gettin" hitched in Vegas or some shit. For reals.
Can someone translate this to white?
 

001001102

Silver Knight of the Realm
353
108
Tenks said:
Can someone translate this to white?
I thought Gaige was the transsexual forum poster who was chased off for being a faggot recently, but then I realized Glaive was the tranny, bro.
 

Cutlery

Kill All the White People
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001001102 said:
Anyway, some shit went down, and now she and EP are totally gettin" hitched in Vegas or some shit. For reals.
Wait a minute.

Get cancer, fuck bitches?


This post was purely for comedic value and is in no way referring to Ravvenn as a bitch.
 

The Ancient_sl

shitlord
7,386
16
TheCutlery said:
Wait a minute.

Get cancer, fuck bitches?


This post was purely for comedic value and is in no way referring to Ravvenn as a bitch.
I think it"s interesting you apologized for calling Ravenn a bitch and not for making a joke about getting Cancer.
 

Voyce

Shit Lord Supreme
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001001102 said:
I thought Gaige was the transsexual forum poster who was chased off for being a faggot recently, but then I realized Glaive was the tranny, bro.
I think Gaige is the pedophile, but I never read that thread.
 

Cutlery

Kill All the White People
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The Ancient said:
I think it"s interesting you apologized for calling Ravenn a bitch and not for making a joke about getting Cancer.
It"s fine to joke about cancer, it"s past the statute of limitations. I mean, shit, we can joke about AIDS and 9/11 right? Cancer is most certainly not off limits.
 

Sutekh

Blackwing Lair Raider
7,489
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Ravvenn said:
I got one by someone who was the first 99% "enemy" that sent me a message. I replied pointing out that all of our mandatory answers were complete opposites (he insisted on a Christian, obviously due to what I just said, his views on homosexuality and gay marriage differed from mine, he didn"t shower every day, hated dogs, etc.). He messaged me back saying that his "friend" filled out his profile while he was drunk. I told him I couldn"t date a pussy who"d roll over on his beliefs for a piece of ass.

I have gotten some really awesome messages that I enjoyed reading, and talking to the guys. They"re few and thousands of miles between, but were quality messages. I reply to 1-2 messages every 3-6 months and they"re always the messages that are witty, didn"t use "text speak" (hi how r u ths wknd), and the guys who took the time to fill out their profile AND add (recent) pictures.

I never know which pictures to use. I try to use pictures that are worse than how I look when dolled up, so that way if by some freak chance I do meet someone, I"ll look better instead of worse (it made sense in my head at the time).
AYE GURL
 

Zehnpai

Molten Core Raider
399
1,245
The Ancient said:
I think it"s interesting you apologized for calling Ravenn a bitch and not for making a joke about getting Cancer.
At least cancer can be beat with medication and radiation therapy. Pretty sure you need to fake your own death, flee the country and go into hiding for a year if you anger Lori.