Elden Ring handles punishment masterfully because it's simple, immediate, and meaningful. You make a mistake, you pay a clear cost, and then you get the chance to recover and continue. That's risk players can internalize, learn from, and adapt to. By contrast, mechanics like instant EXP loss, mandatory corpse runs, or other artificially imposed penalties are not "adventure" or "challenge", IMO. They're tedium dressed up as gameplay. They don't teach you anything about the systems, the environment, or the player's own skill. They just force you to move slower, worry more, and repeat the same grind until you eventually reach a point where you no longer have to pay the "tedium tax". True engagement comes from letting players fail, learn, and adapt. Not taxing them with hours of meaningless busywork just to reach the point where the mechanics stop being a chore - whether because you've attempted enough times, acquired sufficient gear, or simply memorized the rote steps.
This kind of punishment discourages experimentation and discovery. It pushes players into overly cautious behavior rather than letting them naturally engage with the game world. It doesn't create meaningful tension/friction, it just creates frustration disguised as consequence. True risk and engagement come from clear, recoverable failure, where the player's learning curve is the reward, not the act of suffering through hours of arbitrary busywork. Anything beyond that - corpse runs, punitive XP penalties, etc. isn't challenge. It's just an obstacle course designed to make the player jump through hoops until the game eventually stops punishing them.
I'm not opposed to EXP penalties, gear penalties, etc. No penalty is off my table, really. I think death should sting in most cases. But there are a million better ways to do it than "the EQ way".