My dad is probably dying, i am both worried sick and mad

Denamian

Denamian

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Due to cardiorenal failure, they used dilaudid (hydromorphone) for my dad at the end. He was able to process it better than morphine. Sounds like your dad is in a similar situation.

I don't know anything to say that will make it less painful for you, but I hope things can go peacefully and comfortably for your dad.
 
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DirkDonkeyroot

DirkDonkeyroot

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Nothing any of us can say will help you through this hard time, but don't forget to take care of yourself too. Make sure you say everything you need to say to him now while he knows what's going on around him.

I don't know you bro, but my dad died the same way and I couldn't be there for him. I am truly sorry for what you are going through.
 
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Goatface

Goatface

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Really thankful for all your comments. I have only gotten a few hours sleep in last day or so and way it is going might have keep going till day break.

Izo said:
Sounds like the end
Click to expand...

Nurse said about 72 hours max.
 
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Goatface

Goatface

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I gave morphine every 30 minutes most of the night finally got him to resting peacefully. Around 7 he had a bit of restlessness then went back to sleep. Few minutes later he passed away
 
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C

Caligula_The_Cat

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Goatface said:
I gave morphine every 30 minutes most of the night finally got him to resting peacefully. Around 7 he had a bit of restlessness then went back to sleep. Few minutes later he passed away
Click to expand...
You did more than a lot of children would do for their parents. Now all you can do is live a life he would be proud of and wait for the reunion in heaven.
 
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Noodleface

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Goatface said:
I gave morphine every 30 minutes most of the night finally got him to resting peacefully. Around 7 he had a bit of restlessness then went back to sleep. Few minutes later he passed away
Click to expand...
Sorry brother. As a father myself I can only hope my children can take care of me at the end like you did for yours.
 
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moonarchia

moonarchia

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Goatface said:
I gave morphine every 30 minutes most of the night finally got him to resting peacefully. Around 7 he had a bit of restlessness then went back to sleep. Few minutes later he passed away
Click to expand...
That sucks. Going to think about you today when I hug my parents, and cherish them just a bit more while I still can.
 
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Cad

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Goatface said:
I gave morphine every 30 minutes most of the night finally got him to resting peacefully. Around 7 he had a bit of restlessness then went back to sleep. Few minutes later he passed away
Click to expand...
Very good thing you did being by his side at the end. It has got to be one of everyone's fear to be alone or around strangers at that time, and you did the best thing for him by having that not happen. We could all hope to go with our sons by our side.
 
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Seananigans

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Goatface said:
I gave morphine every 30 minutes most of the night finally got him to resting peacefully. Around 7 he had a bit of restlessness then went back to sleep. Few minutes later he passed away
Click to expand...

Very sorry to hear that, condolences. The worst aspect of life that we have to live through.

I do hope you asked for his stuff, as is FoH tradition.
 
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lurkingdirk

lurkingdirk

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Goatface Goatface I'm sorry man. I had a very similar experience with my own father. When we got to his last night, we were giving him the max medication every chance we could. When he passed, he was peaceful and showing no outward signs of pain. His children, wife, and several grandchildren were sitting with him. I believe he was pleased with how it ended, not that he wanted to go.

All that to say I'm sorry because you have lost something major in your life. You'll likely be distracted for a few days with organizing details for whatever send off you'll give him, and then you'll slow down, and it will hit you again. This isn't to discourage you, it's to tell you to allow it to hit you hard. Mourning is extremely important. It sounds like he was an important person in your life. And you in his. And he is gone, but he knows you are the type of person he wanted you to be. He died with family right there with him. Well done.

And I don't know if you care or not, but I will be praying for you in the coming days. Peace, brother.
 
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Lanx

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Sorry for your loss man, when my dad was at the end from hospice it sounded like the same deal. my dad wasn't a very expressive man but when he was in hospice he really liked his nurse (we moved him to a chinese hospice, he had a cute bubbly chinese nurse), hopefully your dad had that little bit of happy with his stay in hospice as well.
 
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TJT

TJT

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Sorry to hear brother. It's never easy. When my dad went I was grateful that he had just come off a fishing run (he was a commercial tuna fisherman up until the day he died) at age 70. Felt a little bad the next day. Then died a few days later. Looking back I don't know how I dealt with it. My daughter had been born in that same month and I just threw myself at other things. I still do silly things like pour a beer for him every year. Sometimes I think about it too hard and get really worked up about it. So I try not to.

Praying for you.
 
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Goatface

Goatface

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Lanx said:
Sorry for your loss man, when my dad was at the end from hospice it sounded like the same deal. my dad wasn't a very expressive man but when he was in hospice he really liked his nurse (we moved him to a chinese hospice, he had a cute bubbly chinese nurse), hopefully your dad had that little bit of happy with his stay in hospice as well.
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due to where i live, this hospice covered about 1200sq miles/4k miles of road. they had a lot of nurses pulling long shifts on rotating schedules. they were all good people. he really liked one, she was young mom full of joy and made lots of little jokes and told stories. several others were very friendly and brought a little happiness with them.
 
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