The Girls Who Broke Your Heart Thread

Malkav

Malkav

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Malkav_sl said:
Oh, well, fuck it, I know this will get drowned in whore talk, but whatever, I'm too drunk to care.

Lately (meaning, the last few years), I've been living the most boring life ever. Single, everything for my job, didn't care about anything else, and most of all, no risk taking in the feelings department. My brain has been controlling everything, not even allowing myself to have a crush, thinking it could hurt me and put me off balance.

I'm going on my 29th birthday and I've turned out to be like the most boring guy I know, and now I don't really like it. I kinda long for the time I was 20 and didn't have a care in the world.

Back then, I had a best friend, yes, a girl best friend. I was going through a rough patch when I met her, and she pulled me by the ass, going all "you need to enjoy your life and have fun". Back then, we would always hang out together, get drunk together, stay the night together at her apartment, and, well, fuck together, no strings attached.

It kept up like for a year or so, and then she left for Belgium for her studies (we were living in Paris, and I'm still there). I went there and saw her a few times the following two years, until, well, life happened and got us apart. She found a boyfriend there, even though she was not into relationships, and we kinda stopped talking with each other at some point. No news since then, yadda yadda.

Fast forward until this week. Was spending the evening on facebook, having an all around bad time (friend drama, I hate it). I posted something like a pissed of status, which my old best friend commented on, and I kinda replied to it like her answer was ironic (she said something like "sorry for you" and I replied "well, thanks, I think").

Soon after, I was getting a straight to the point message from her : "Hey, we've not talked for a long time. If you ever want to spend a weekend up there in Bruxelles, you can come whenever you want, I'd be pleased to see you".

Inside, I was like "What the fucking fuck is happening?" I mean, we hadn't talked for like 4 or 5 years, and she never seemed like the nostalgic type to me. So I acted all cool like "Hey, could be fun yes. Kinda surprise because I'm not the type to go and talk with people of the past, but yeah I think I'd like it", and she was like "Neither am I to talk with people of the past, but I'd be really please to see you again." The discussion was kinda short, but suffice it to say, I kinda can go there to see her whenever I want.

What's the point of all this talk? Well, this girl kinda has been the girl I've used as a measurement for all other girls since then. She was my manic pixie dream girl, if you know what I mean.


And here I am, fully knowing that in 5+ years we both have changed, but judging my actual life as she would have seen it back then. I'm not an adventurer anymore. I'm just a boring old ass, not taking any risk or anything. And I'm telling to myself : you need to change that, you need to be young again. Maybe not irresponsible like back then, but you need to learn to have fun again.

And I know the first risk I'll take : going to Bruxelles in a month or two (when work allows it) to see her. I'm dead afraid of the idea, but I'm gonna do it.

Even though I still don't fucking know why she would come and tell me "I'd love to see you again" 8 years after our days together.
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Aaaand, to keep you updated, I'm going there to see her next week.

The boyfriend's still in the picture, so of course nothing will happen.

Still, I'm like dead anxious about it, because it has the potential to be just immensely awkward.
 
McCheese

McCheese

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Anyways, I'm thinking she just wanted a one nighter. I didn't deliver; she lost interest.
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I'm in a very similar situation as you. I just recently started dating a 3rd year med student who I met via a dating website. Needless to say she's extremely busy, working from 5am to 6pm Mon - Sat and doing studying in the few hours she's able to stay awake after work.

That said, she's made time in her crazy busy schedule for 3 dates so far. If a chick is interested she will make time for you.

You nailed it with the text I quoted. Move on.
 
D

Dabamf_sl

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By the way, regarding Vim's story, I think it's a good practice to always progress things sexually. 100% of the time. If she's not down, then you can back off. Pulling the "I like her and don't want her to think I'm only after sex" line of reasoning (not that you did, just a general statement) makes intuitive sense, but I don't think it actually has any benefit. I've never had a single situation, nor heard of one, in which attempting to progress had negative consequences. But I have heard of plenty in which not progressing did. I think girls respect guys who are aggressive and go after what they want. And everyone knows guys always want to get laid. Plus, just because some chick is educated doesn't mean she doesn't want to just go out for some casual sex now and then.
Malkav_sl said:
Aaaand, to keep you updated, I'm going there to see her next week.

The boyfriend's still in the picture, so of course nothing will happen.

Still, I'm like dead anxious about it, because it has the potential to be just immensely awkward.
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Good call, and good luck. No reason to worry about it. She's not in your life anymore anyway. She probably won't be after this either. When in doubt, any experience is better than no experience.
 
A

Antarius

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Dabamf_sl said:
By the way, regarding Vim's story, I think it's a good practice to always progress things sexually.
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100% True and great advice.



The girl I'm seeing right now... we hooked up early (first night we met)... and she kept testing me to see if I "loved her" or was just using her for sex. I was honest with her and said I liked her, but it's mostly just that I enjoy having sex with her. Turns out she's actually a swinger, and wanted to make sure I wasn't getting overly attached to her before she told me. She's since taken me to 2 different swingers clubs that she frequents. (I guess it's a common problem that guys get overly attached and jealous, even guys that she'll meet at the clubs)
 
kegkilla

kegkilla

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Antarius_sl said:
100% True and great advice.
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so are you gonna tell us about the swingers clubs or what?


The girl I'm seeing right now... we hooked up early (first night we met)... and she kept testing me to see if I "loved her" or was just using her for sex. I was honest with her and said I liked her, but it's mostly just that I enjoy having sex with her. Turns out she's actually a swinger, and wanted to make sure I wasn't getting overly attached to her before she told me. She's since taken me to 2 different swingers clubs that she frequents. (I guess it's a common problem that guys get overly attached and jealous, even guys that she'll meet at the clubs)[/QUOTE]
 
Void

Void

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Haast_sl said:
Vvoid, how did your date with the physical therapy front desk chick go?
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I met her for coffee and spent about an hour chatting and having a good time. I would say that it went well and I'd have certainly taken her on a real date of some sort soon after, except that she warned me right up front that her next several months were going to be hellish, with her spending two weeks at a time in various cities like Bakersfield I believe (couple hours away, boring as fuck) to train those offices on the new computer system. With at least five out of area sites (potentially 10+ if the other person doing it doesn't cut it) we were looking at pretty much 2-3 months minimum of her having nothing but a weekend back at home here and there. We both agreed that trying to have any sort of normal "get to know each other" phase with all of that going on probably wasn't fair to either of us. We've texted a bunch, but nothing more serious than her wanting to get back on the skates so she can take out her frustrations from training idiots (remember she does roller derby), and me saying I look forward to watching her kick bitches asses.

She could very well be simply keeping me at a distance, but I feel the desire to continue once she has a bit of time is genuine. She really has nothing to gain by stringing me along, as I'm not giving her anything financially, emotionally, support, whatever. We haven't gotten lovey-dovey in our texts, we haven't talked about the future much at all, haven't even had any real in-depth conversations about life, but since we've only had coffee together and chit-chatted randomly during my therapy sessions, we don't really have a lot to build on. It seems to me like she's fine letting me know she's still around without expecting anything else out of it, and I'm not doing anything stupid (that I know of) in return, so it really just seems like we'll have to wait and see. I could have forced her to go on a date one of those weekends, but driving back late Friday night, spending Saturday doing shit you need to do, and then driving to another place Sunday afternoon doesn't really leave a lot of time for it. We talk about finally being able to get together occasionally, but right now we're just waiting.

To be honest, what I've typed here is probably more discussion about it than we've had. I think it is just one of those horrible timing situations. I'll wait around if nothing else comes up in the meantime, and I'm certainly not going to be a dick to her, but if it never happens I won't be out any more than a few texts either.

So yeah, a whole lot of nothing, but at least some day in the future I'll make the move for a date and I'll know better then. Or I'll meet someone better before then and not worry about her. Either way, no reason to not continue saying hi every few days at least.

I will update further when I know anything more.
 
Famm

Famm

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That thread potentially had so much more to give. Who knows what lurking demons might still have emerged. If someone had just ignored Etoille and Gavinrad's attention whoring birthing talk it might still be going!
 
A

Antarius

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TheBeagle_sl said:
I already miss the Vicodin and cigs thread...everything else is lame and pales in comparison now.
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The difference is that in this thread people talk about the stupid and fucked up things they do.

In that thread, people talk about the stupid and fucked up things other people do.


What do you want to know Keg?
 
kegkilla

kegkilla

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Antarius_sl said:
The difference is that in this thread people talk about the stupid and fucked up things they do.

In that thread, people talk about the stupid and fucked up things other people do.


What do you want to know Keg?
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how did it go? did you bang other chicks? other dudes? watch your girl get banged?
 
Famm

Famm

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What kind of condoms does everyone use? Do you get freebees at health departments/planned parenthood and shit, or buy them? Best places to order online? What's best for being strong against breaking and maybe having some spermicide on it?
 
Big Phoenix

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Famm_sl said:
That thread potentially had so much more to give. Who knows what lurking demons might still have emerged. If someone had just ignored Etoille and Gavinrad's attention whoring birthing talk it might still be going!
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Well considering a_skeleton_03 was going with the whole "I only helped her with her drug addiction, didnt touch her vagina" stance and everyone else connected to her is gone or didnt show up to the thread at all, it was dead.
 
Soygen

Soygen

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If there is another bombshell feel free to PM me and I guess we could move it back to SS, but the last 24 hours of that thread were pretty much its death-knell.

EDIT: Looks like you can't make new posts on threads in the HOF, even if the thread is still "open".
 
A

Antarius

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Grand Inquisitor Kegkilla_sl said:
how did it go? did you bang other chicks? other dudes? watch your girl get banged?
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My girl got a "fire massage" from some pyro specialist. Saw a couple girls getting tied up with ropes, and they had some kind of vacuum latex baggy thing too which was pretty cool to watch. They had a room set up for teacher/student fantasies, and I used a leather whip on my girl there and fingered her while about 9-10 people watched.

Later, I got a blowjob from my girl while sitting out in the open at the bar, and fucked her in the "couples area" while other people watched. When I finished, my girl started fingering/eating out another girl in the same room while she(the other girl) was blowing her guy. I was offered a blowjob from that girl if I could get hard again, but I was pretty much spent at that point (I'd also had at least 6-7 drinks that night so whiskey dick took over).

p.s. that was the first night (saturday).

On Sunday (2nd trip) the other club had a special opening specifically for the daytona 500, the place was pretty dead, but gave my girl a massage and met another couple that is good friends with my girl while that guy gave his girl a massage on a table right next to us.
 
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