The Girls Who Broke Your Heart Thread

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Kolohe
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...and one reason I've lurk in every forum I visit is because I can't string together a paragraph that shares a common thought.
 

Sutekh

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I'm really not going to chase her all over the earth. She's got valid complaints, I just never cared when anyone else said them. I get along very well with 95% of the people I meet and work with, but I'm sure I'm not an easy guy to date. One thing she said that pissed me off was that I'm always "bubbly". First off, the word is emasculating. Second, I'm not bouncing off the walls happy, I'm just always in a good mood. I enjoy life and apparently that's exhausting.

The way I see it, I lost someone I wanted to keep and part of the reason is personality flaws that have needed to be fixed for awhile. I won't date her again just because she'll have me. She needs to make some changes too, I just need to make the majority of them. She is a damn good cook, though.
I don't know man, that last sentence makes me just want to say fuck it all. If she's willing to give it another shot after you change some, and you're willing to give it another shot after she changes. Why not just go find people that are better suited towards the both of you.
 

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Kolohe
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And that's pretty much the thought that's been occupying my mind. I normally do just say fuck it.
I used to be a tour guide in Hawaii. One of the random, cheesy, canned questions you always ask older couples that offer something like "we're celebrating our 50th anniversary" is "So, help out a young guy. What's the secret?". Older couples always say it takes work and compromise and young people aren't willing to do that.

That's a big part of why I'm willing to work at it.
 

Sutekh

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And that's pretty much the thought that's been occupying my mind. I normally do just say fuck it.
I used to be a tour guide in Hawaii. One of the random, cheesy, canned questions you always ask older couples that offer something like "we're celebrating our 50th anniversary" is "So, help out a young guy. What's the secret?". Older couples always say it takes work and compromise and young people aren't willing to do that.

That's a big part of why I'm willing to work at it.
Well I'd agree it does take work and compromise, but it takes work and compromise from both parties that are willing to do it. It sounds like she's pretty unwilling if she decided to call it quits and THEN wants to give it another go after you're fixed. Personally that trait isn't something that sounds appealing to me, especially in someone that I'd potentially want to marry.

Also I think it's good to keep in mind that a relationship 50+ years ago is almost completely different than a relationship now.
 

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Kolohe
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I think she's willing to change, she just wants to see a change in me first. Besides, who cares? If it ends up being positive life changes, the I don't think the reason matters so much. I may be doing it for her, but I'm definitely prepared for the relationship not to start up again.
ADHD was a damn good trait to have as a zipline guide. Now I'm working a more professional job where full attention is critical. I'm also back in school again.

EDIT: One thing I forgot to mention is that I broke up with her a few weeks earlier. She was getting distant and wasn't ever smiling or happy. She's got a lot going on with starting a new job, so I was trying to be understanding of that. I felt pretty bad about breaking up with her right when she's starting a new job. She came over the next day and said she's just stressed and hasn't been coming over as much because she feels like we're at the comfortable part of our relationship and she doesn't need to see me 24/7. There had been tension for a few weeks before that, but I don't feel like typing it all out right now. Basically, we were bickering about every little thing.

I asked if she wanted to give it another shot, and she said yes. I also told her if she felt like we weren't right for eachother, "now is the best and most pain free time to end it." She said that she loves me and still sees us getting married in the future.

Dunno, does not compute to me.
 

Sutekh

Blackwing Lair Raider
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I think she's willing to change, she just wants to see a change in me first. Besides, who cares? If it ends up being positive life changes, the I don't think the reason matters so much. I may be doing it for her, but I'm definitely prepared for the relationship not to start up again.
ADHD was a damn good trait to have as a zipline guide. Now I'm working a more professional job where full attention is critical. I'm also back in school again.

EDIT: One thing I forgot to mention is that I broke up with her a few weeks earlier. She was getting distant and wasn't ever smiling or happy. She's got a lot going on with starting a new job, so I was trying to be understanding of that. I felt pretty bad about breaking up with her right when she's starting a new job. She came over the next day and said she's just stressed and hasn't been coming over as much because she feels like we're at the comfortable part of our relationship and she doesn't need to see me 24/7. There had been tension for a few weeks before that, but I don't feel like typing it all out right now. Basically, we were bickering about every little thing.

I asked if she wanted to give it another shot, and she said yes. I also told her if she felt like we weren't right for eachother, "now is the best and most pain free time to end it." She said that she loves me and still sees us getting married in the future.

Dunno, does not compute to me.
Man that's some pretty important information to leave out...

I don't know what to say, there's obviously a shit ton of stuff not said in this situation but it does seem both of you cared about each other?
 

Antarius

Lord Nagafen Raider
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I think she's willing to change, she just wants to see a change in me first. Besides, who cares? If it ends up being positive life changes, the I don't think the reason matters so much. I may be doing it for her, but I'm definitely prepared for the relationship not to start up again.
ADHD was a damn good trait to have as a zipline guide. Now I'm working a more professional job where full attention is critical. I'm also back in school again.

EDIT: One thing I forgot to mention is that I broke up with her a few weeks earlier. She was getting distant and wasn't ever smiling or happy. She's got a lot going on with starting a new job, so I was trying to be understanding of that. I felt pretty bad about breaking up with her right when she's starting a new job. She came over the next day and said she's just stressed and hasn't been coming over as much because she feels like we're at the comfortable part of our relationship and she doesn't need to see me 24/7. There had been tension for a few weeks before that, but I don't feel like typing it all out right now. Basically, we were bickering about every little thing.

I asked if she wanted to give it another shot, and she said yes. I also told her if she felt like we weren't right for eachother, "now is the best and most pain free time to end it." She said that she loves me and still sees us getting married in the future.

Dunno, does not compute to me.
TL;DR

You broke up with her, so she decided to go bang other dudes.

You wanted to get back together, and she's like "nah, I'm good"

?
 

TheBeagle

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The only thing I have to add is the couple times I took some Adderall it gave me speed weenie, aka - serious shrinkage. No fucking way I could do that shit on a daily basis.
 

Hatorade

A nice asshole.
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Bandwagon, any good relationship is built on respect, love doesn't mean shit without respect. Short version neither of you respect each other and no matter what you do to better your self you and the current girl will never work.
 

Palum

what Suineg set it to
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Bandwagon, any good relationship is built on respect, love doesn't mean shit without respect. Short version neither of you respect each other and no matter what you do to better your self you and the current girl will never work.
Yea, there's a lot of talk about wanting to change, but none of that matters because the first communication about issues came after it was already over. There either wasn't enough respect there to have a real conversation about problems, or both of you really didn't care in the first place. You just miss it now that it's gone.
 

Lusiphur

Peasant
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Good to see some real stuff in this thread instead of Johnny49's trolling.
Bandwagon, shit or get off the pot dude. Make it happen or move on, life is too short for prevarication. Be who you want to be (and if you that isn't who you currently are then change is good) and if that doesn't work for her then move on. See if you think she still has to change then.
 

Voyce

Shit Lord Supreme
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I'm always "bubbly".
Good, fuck her man--you're always in a good mood. That's fucking fantastic don't change yourself for some dumb chick, who'll try and drain that shit from you anyway. You know how many assholes, myself include have our fucking days--where, we're just a fucking a bummer to be around. Being a genuinely upbeat person is something I envy in people that can generate it perpetually. My Dad's a genuinely upbeat guy, he's spent the last 30 odd years having that drained out of him by his **** wife. Don't give up happiness that you already have, to get more happiness that she's gonna drain from you.


God damn if I could just be upbeat all the time, and smile at everyone, you know really smile. pft don't give that up, for some miserable moody fuck.
 

iannis

Musty Nester
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Roosters. I live in a major world city, why am I dealing with roosters?
Mexians. They bring their chickens with them. I'm not even fucking kidding.

I think it's a cute trait personally, but it is pretty fucking funny when you're sitting outside and they start crowing at like 10 o'clock. Roosters don't crow at dawn. They crow whenever they fucking feel like.

Stupid and mean. If God ever created an animal that deserves to be eaten, it's a fucking chicken.
 

Bandwagon

Kolohe
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Started taking the prescription 3 days ago. Splitting fucking headache. Bah.

Basically, what it comes down to is both of us need to make changes. I'm willing, for the most part. If she is willing, we can give it another go. I've already put myself out there, it's all up to her now. She's a great woman and I'll get back with her in a heartbeat if she wants to put an effort in, but I'm not holding my breath.

In the mean time, I've got a date with a cute and surprisingly well-spoken bartender. I went in between classes for a beer and food before my boring class, and she bought my sandwich and told me she'd buy me a few beers if I came in after my last class. Not really looking to get into anything, but the ego-boost was much appreciated.
 

dangler_sl

shitlord
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5
Mexians. They bring their chickens with them. I'm not even fucking kidding.

I think it's a cute trait personally, but it is pretty fucking funny when you're sitting outside and they start crowing at like 10 o'clock. Roosters don't crow at dawn. They crow whenever they fucking feel like.

Stupid and mean. If God ever created an animal that deserves to be eaten, it's a fucking chicken.
Nah man, I live in Vietnam. Not too many Mexicans here.


edit.. why is this in the gwbyht? Wrong thread, my bad. I blame sleep deprivation.
And yes, they crow whenever they fucking feel like it. fuck.their.shit.hard.
 

Jx3

Riddle me this...
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So stupid question, how does one handle pets when you break up/divorce? The reason I ask is a friend of mine is going through a nasty break up with his long time girlfriend and that seems to be a sticking point. As a person who has 3 dogs and got them while with my current girlfriend I'm curious what to do in the event this thing goes belly up. I personally don't see that happening anytime soon after we had our big talk a couple months ago but if this thread is anything to go by that doesn't always mean shit can't go bad real quick.
 

toomanynames_sl

shitlord
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0
Who can "deal" with them best should get dibs. Deal as in, feed, shelter, supply attention, etc. If those points are equal then it goes to a coin toss LOL. Had 3 cats, I got 2, ex got one, but then one of the two I had went brain dead and couldn't navigate stairs (went from an appartment to a colonial). Damn thing wouldn't stop pissing upstairs so I gave that one to the ex too.
 

popsicledeath

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You have a third party suggest cutting the pet in half. Whomever would rather see the pet live than get their half deserves to keep it. If you both want the pet to live so will give the pet to the other person, consider seeing if make-up sex helps solve the problem.