They Will Kill You (2026)

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Title: They Will Kill You (2026)

Tagline: Join us. Vacancies fill up fast.

Genre: Horror, Comedy

Director: Kirill Sokolov

Cast: Zazie Beetz, Patricia Arquette, Tom Felton, Heather Graham, Myha'la, Darron Meyer, Armando Rivera, Gabe Gabriel, Chris van Rensburg, Megan Alexander, David Viviers

Release: 2026-03-26

Plot: A woman answers a help wanted ad to be a housekeeper in a mysterious high-rise in New York City, not realizing she is entering a community that has seen a number of disappearances over the years and may be under the grip of a Satanic cult.
 

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Hateyou

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They showed the entire damn plot and movie in that trailer. I know everyone who dies, why they’re doing what they’re doing, and where she turned into John wick. Sheesh.
 
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Szlia

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Oh... I saw this. It's nothing much, but it is somewhat entertaining. I have not seen the previous movies of the director, but if I have to very unfairly put him in a category based on a single film, it would be "very enthousiastic film lover who might not be the brightest". A category he would share with Tarantino for instance. There is a very obvious love of film making, there is a very obvious film culture on display (here with references to the style of japanese saber movies of the '60s and '70s), but all this to serve a pretty mundane and tropes heavy plot that only looks for dumb fun. There is a commendable energy and enthusiasm, it has also the rare politeness these days to be a very concise movie that does not waste an hour on exposition, but I can't help this feeling that all these movies the director saw and love and that he is able to reference / mimic, he did not really understood why they are good. A kind of "sage points at the moon, idiot looks at the finger" deal.

I rated it a 2 on my 0 to 5 scale, but that's a bit harsh, because it manages to deliver pretty well what it tried to deliver: a fun mix of action, horror and comedy with stylish form and steady pace.
 
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