They Will Kill You (2026)

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Title: They Will Kill You (2026)

Tagline: Join us. Vacancies fill up fast.

Genre: Horror, Comedy

Director: Kirill Sokolov

Cast: Zazie Beetz, Patricia Arquette, Tom Felton, Heather Graham, Myha'la, Darron Meyer, Armando Rivera, Gabe Gabriel, Chris van Rensburg, Megan Alexander, David Viviers

Release: 2026-03-26

Plot: A woman answers a help wanted ad to be a housekeeper in a mysterious high-rise in New York City, not realizing she is entering a community that has seen a number of disappearances over the years and may be under the grip of a Satanic cult.
 
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Hateyou

Hateyou

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They showed the entire damn plot and movie in that trailer. I know everyone who dies, why they’re doing what they’re doing, and where she turned into John wick. Sheesh.
 
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Szlia

Szlia

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Oh... I saw this. It's nothing much, but it is somewhat entertaining. I have not seen the previous movies of the director, but if I have to very unfairly put him in a category based on a single film, it would be "very enthousiastic film lover who might not be the brightest". A category he would share with Tarantino for instance. There is a very obvious love of film making, there is a very obvious film culture on display (here with references to the style of japanese saber movies of the '60s and '70s), but all this to serve a pretty mundane and tropes heavy plot that only looks for dumb fun. There is a commendable energy and enthusiasm, it has also the rare politeness these days to be a very concise movie that does not waste an hour on exposition, but I can't help this feeling that all these movies the director saw and love and that he is able to reference / mimic, he did not really understood why they are good. A kind of "sage points at the moon, idiot looks at the finger" deal.

I rated it a 2 on my 0 to 5 scale, but that's a bit harsh, because it manages to deliver pretty well what it tried to deliver: a fun mix of action, horror and comedy with stylish form and steady pace.
 
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jayrebb

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Looks woke as shit going off the cast.

Szlia doesn't even like it and the split 50/50 critics isn't exactly enticing either.

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Black critic couldn't even pretend it was good.

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Aazrael

Aazrael

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Hateyou said:
They showed the entire damn plot and movie in that trailer. I know everyone who dies, why they’re doing what they’re doing, and where she turned into John wick. Sheesh.
Click to expand...
Well theres quite a twist to the movie so the trailer did not really spoil much.

Halfway through and it's kinda entertaining in the splatter movie kind of sense.
 
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Vuuxo

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The second I saw the woman as the "hero". I stopped watching the trailer. I'm completely done with the boss babe bullshit. I'd rather watch 2 hours of two people in love doing the "passing ship" glances instead of this female hero bullshit. This fucking shit makes me want to climb a fucking clock tower.
 
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Fucker

Fucker

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Vuuxo said:
The second I saw the woman as the "hero". I stopped watching the trailer. I'm completely done with the boss babe bullshit. I'd rather watch 2 hours of two people in love doing the "passing ship" glances instead of this female hero bullshit. This fucking shit makes me want to climb a fucking clock tower.
Click to expand...
This isn't that type of movie.
 
Intrinsic

Intrinsic

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I didn't watch the trailer until finishing the movie just now. It pretty much does show the whole point of the film, the details of the plot aren't especially important. The movie is just a lot of stuff for the sake of being a lot. Maybe that's just the specific genre. It isn't egregiously offensive or anything just one fight scene to the next fight scene that tries to incorporate newer cooler more ultimate kills! It takes me back to my thoughts on John Wick 4 (maybe it was 3?) that by the end I'm just so exhausted of this need to kill off waves of people in cute and clever ways. I got the point the 1st 20 minutes and now an hour later we're still doing the same thing but this it is just marginally different and awesomer!

Sort of feels the same as comparisons between From Dusk til Dawn and the recent black vampire film that I've already forgotten the name of. I've seen it before with more charm, humor, and thought put into it. While not terrible, I'll forget this in a couple of weeks too.
 
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Movie information in first post provided by The Movie Database
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