Uncharted (2022)

spronk

spronk

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Saw this today with my free PS5 upgrade code, its not worth paying money for. Its not good. Its not terrible. Its just aggressively mediocre.

It just felt like one of those crap Netflix action movies you watch at 1am in the morning when you can't sleep. Horrible casting, especially Mark Wahlberg, as expected. None of the characters had charisma or chemistry with each other. By the end I did sorta buy Tom Holland as young Nathan Drake and Chloe was decent but they never felt like they worked like an ensemble at all.

Its unfair but Uncharted 4 is just so much better and more fun/interesting to just watch, let alone play. Much of the movie felt like a Disneyland ride. The product placement is absolutely wretched, I guess the movie was underwritten by Papa Johns because there is EXTENSIVE PJ sign/advertising in the movie.

When it comes out on HBO or whatever its fine to watch, but unless you have tons of free time not really worth a trek out to theaters.
 
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spronk

spronk

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world celebrates black history month by pushing to #1 a movie where the only black character is evil and 2 white guys save the day

if you go see it there are TWO post credit scenes, a short 15 second early stinger and a longer 2 min "setup for UC2" scene mid credits
 
Szlia

Szlia

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It's not that this movie is bad, it's more that it is a paint-by-numbers adventure film with the flattest of dramatic arc. There are some amusing ideas here and there and, if you accept that these characters share barely more than names with those of the games, the cast is ok. The attempt at the true-to-brand Uncharted banter is not as charming, but is mildly funny at times...

I think the worst part is that this movie has absolutely nothing to say about anything (other than maybe providing some fortune cookie wisdom about the value of trust). You would think a 2022 movie about treasure hunting would inject some questions about who owns what, about the heritage of imperialism, about patrimonial preservation... there is the tiniest amount of it. I am not saying it should be front and center, but... come on! To be fair, the source material does not delve too much into these questions either, but at least there is something about the people involved. The risks, the almost clinically unquenchable thirst for discoveries and/or wealth, the price in lives and destructions of these endeavors, the new, old and made up families, etc... The little of it there is in the movie is either treated as a joke or has zero dramatic weight. In the games, the mystery that is being investigated also shed light on the human drama of a time long past. It's often a story about uncovering another story. Not much of that in the movie either.

Anyway... long story short : Unsurprisingly inferior to the games.
 
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Downhammer

Downhammer

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Szlia said:
I think the worst part is that this movie has absolutely nothing to say about anything (other than maybe providing some fortune cookie wisdom about the value of trust). You would think a 2022 movie about treasure hunting would inject some questions about who owns what, about the heritage of imperialism, about patrimonial preservation... there is the tiniest amount of it.
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On the other hand, the lack of any societal message was refreshing to me. I'm not saying it was a great movie, but there's room for action adventure movies that don't try to shove a bunch of BLM, feminist, occupy wall street crap down your throat.

The guy sitting next to me kept getting questions from his girlfriend and was having to explain shit during the whole movie. I couldn't hear her specific questions but I was thinking "what the fuck needs any explanation." The very little bit that required some thinking had exposition to essentially do the thinking for you. With the exception of Tom and Marky Mark every character was a unique race/sex combo so it's not like you could confuse anyone.
 
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jayrebb

jayrebb

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looks back burner. heard its not national treasure, its got no da vinci code. the depth is lacking

if you have nothing else to watch on a dead night maybe its a go.
 
E

elidib

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Movie was fun, but over the top for sure. Jumped the shark when the helicopters picked up the wooden ships that had been sitting in a water-filled cave for hundreds of years and started flying them around.

Mark Wahlberg was just horribly miscast. You can tell from certain lines that the script called for an older gentleman to be sully, like the character from the games. Furthermore, I swear to god at the start of the movie, Mark is trying to use a southern accent for Sully, but by the end he is right back to full on Baaastan.

Huge plot hole I can't stop thinking about:
How would Nate's brother have known about literally anything in order to send clues to Nate? Even before he was rotting in prison, he never had access to either of the crosses, so was stuck on step one... he couldn't have known anything about the roman treasure trove, or there being a map in the roman jars, much less that you need to use the crosses in such a way as to pinpoint a location on said map using them.
 
Araysar

Loser Araysar

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Neither of these actors are believable as the characters they are supposed to play. Holland is way too young and too small.

But my biggest annoyances is just how sloppily put together all this shit is.

Drake jumps from box to box, towards a plane flying at 400 mph.

Later, they go into a church at day time, emerge at a night club 5 minutes later where a full on 1 am rave is happening presumably in middle of day. Sully fights at Papa John's during same time which is in day time with families eating. Drake ends up going into the water, pulls out his phone 1 minute after he gets out of the water, phone works fine, ear piece works fine, zippo works fine.

Just garbage
 
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Araysar

Loser Araysar

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Wow the 2nd half was even stupider than the first. Fuck this movie
 
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Xexx

Xexx

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This was hot garbage and i gave it 3 tries and fell asleep each time.
 
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