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It's hard to pick up sarcasm sometimes, but I believe this statement to be true.

Sounds excellent. I want a Dirk brisket and Funk bacon sammich.

I guess the Chiefs have to play in Houston because Houston won their division? Meh.

Well, it's been fun, man.

You too man. I got up late so I'm just now catching up on scores.

Fascinating. Thank you, Himeo.

If this abscess kills me, more power to it. It ought to smell real pretty when they put me in the incinerator.

I'll let her know immediately. As an added bonus, I've formed a golf ball sized abscess right behind my left testicle. I say golf ball for accuracy, but it feels more like a softball.

Looks like her boobs are getting angrier at each other as she ages. Should be under her armpits in a few years. Attachment 121561

Can you detail what mustard dumplings are? I've not heard of them. Also, Sir Funk, is it sliced or whole slab?

Sooo... like Bengals hot? Couldn't resist.

I'm just sayin'. The Steelers haven't even made the playoffs yet, and have better odds.

Bengals get no respect. Current Vegas odds:

I'm still here and still riding that fine line between death and living. I suppose I should feel blessed or something to have that one last Thanksgiving and last Christmas with friends and family, but in retrospect it was all pretty bittersweet. You can't really call what I've been doing...

This is so fucking stupid.

Time for an 80 yd pass from AJ to AJ. Nothing against our Denver fans here on the board, but this is bidnezz.

Having a real hard time understanding Cinci's defense this drive.

Poor little feller. I've got the feels, bro. Been there.

Get more fiber, use a supplement if you need to, Kuriin always has one he recommends, and get a colonoscopy. I know your only 33, but for that reason alone, why chance it?

One of my favorite memories as a kid was going to see the Harlem Globetrotters when he was leading them. Attachment 121111

Yeah, that's the person I want trying to drag my unconscious body out of a burning building. Dumb whore cunt.

One for each dick sucked? Wasn't that the magic number in Clerks?

Pretty close so far this week, brother. And can someone tell me how a got damn RB gets -1 points? That's bad.

I can't watch the last 2 minutes of the Chiefs game, it's like the Chicago game all over again.

I would have bet pretty good money at the beginning of the season that the Skins would NOT be NFC East champs.

Meat day today: For lunch, just had green chili queso burgers and for dinner tonight, 1 1/2" Rib-eye steaks, basted in smoked brisket suet. What the fuck do I care about clogged arteries?

There's an old drive-in around here that still sells Bosco Sticks. Have any of you McMozz guys ever tried these? I'm trying to figure out if they are just regional or old-timey. Basically pizza dough wrapped around mozz.

Merry Christmas right back at you merry band of assholes. Seriously though. Thank you.

If I'm alive this time next year, I will do something truly monumental. I don't know what, but it would be good. I'd probably also end up in a medical journal.

I know, I'm an asshole. I like this. More likely, I'm just too stupid to die.

Sonic has the best ice. It's not cubes, it's those crunchy little pebbles. Been buying bags for the house now, I'm hooked.

I smoked way too much weed in the past (chronic daily), it's probably contributed to my current situation. I would like to take Ecstasy once, but that might be on the last day, no sure how it effects a person, just always sounded fun. As far as opioids go, I've got enough to keep that ho in...

I really appreciate this, Oblio. It's hard to believe my cardiologist gave me almost zero chance of coming off the table alive, and gave me three days tops. It's been over a month now, and I was able to celebrate Thanksgiving with family, and hopefully Christmas this year. That was some...

And rightly so. It breaks my heart that a damn 49'ers fan is going to beat me.

All this really isn't necessary. I appreciate the sentiment, however. I live in the sticks and have to use wi-fi for internet, there are no land lines out here. I'm really just focused on holding my shit together to get through Christmas. And maybe New Year's. The last few days have been...

Hell, you're in Texas, just kidnap a cow and render it down for suet.

I think you are good to go on the buffalo one. I guess you could add ham, but I don't see why. I think the cream cheese will be melty enough for you, but if not, add a little provolone. The asian one, I'm currently lost.

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I was just thinking about that this morning. I think it could be done, but it would take a bit of planning.