Search results

Dates? That's where I stick my penis in a girl and then don't talk to her for a week, right?

This is so weird, man. It's like I want this to succeed because at some point I want to just go look at it. So fucking weird.

I could shorten that list for them. 1. Everyone Exactly how Orwellian is this going to get?

I guess I just have a boring fucking family. The worst thing I can think of is something that I did. When we were kids my little brother used to follow me around like a puppy dog. For some reason one day I just hauled off and fucking smacked him and his nose started bleeding. I felt really...

Swearing off masturbation when you're getting handjobs from the upstairs neighbor lady is a little bit like swearing off masturbation when you're getting handjobs from the upstairs neighbor lady. All Glory to the Hypnotoad. I'm just sayin.

Which is fucked up and sad considering that book reads like a movie script. That book was written to be an action movie. It's just obvious to anyone that's read it. But I saw Harrison Ford talk about it on Letterman last night. Harrison Ford needs to stop doing press. I have an idea that...

Dude, gross. You spoo on your laptop? That's what bellies are for.

Yeah, if you're not communicating in some way once a day (during usual circumstances) you're not really dating. I don't mean anything extravagant either. Just a simple 10 second phone call, "Yo. I'm sleepy. Talk to you tomorrow" or something along those lines. Or a quick text. Or an...

See, I'll go weeks without porn or jacking it sometimes. Sometimes you're just not in the mood, nawmean. And the only difference I've noticed yet is that when I do jerk off it's both faster and stickier.

I almost wonder if this is one of those parts of getting older. Like something that your Dad never thought to mention to you because for one, he's your dad and that would be fucking strange, and for two he figured maybe it was just him. Because it's not just porn, and it's not just whacking...

Plus: free uniforms, standard issue laser guns, your own personal quarters on the death star, and if it gets really cold you won't have to cut open a banta to sleep inside. All you ever have to do is not look at, or speak to, Lord Vader. You have one job.

Not really. I know what you mean. That's more recent. The methods of the parties differ, and I think it's perfectly fair to say that unconditional military spending is both as unconservative as it is unsustainable. Neither party is fiscally conservative. I think we have fundamentally...

And if they ran democrats they'd generally be hypocrites when it came to fiscal issues. You can't promote a libertarian agenda and promote increases in social spending at the same time -- that cuts right to the heart of what you're trying to accomplish in a way that social issue hypocrisy...

I'm registered independent, tend to be sympathetic to republic candidates, and have recently have tended to vote Democrat. If my party could start producing politicians that I want to vote for -- that would be great.

You know that shit's tight, even if she did squeeze a kid through it.

Which mad man are you? Dibbs on Beardy McBeard. Get me some of that peggy strange.

The vote was 4-3. Seems legit.

Like Steve Jobs. He'd have gotten there in another 30 years. Death isn't always a tragic event.

Nobody's gonna kill mickey. He's a cockroach. He's a survivor. And yeah, he's been crushing it all season. Even his gimp little twitter-laugh isn't annoying anymore.

How about just foreskin friday then?

You need to introduce "Foursome Friday". It's like casual friday, except even more casual.

I think IB was made specifically to be pretty and whatever else is going on was secondary. It's all over the place. But rather than being pissed off at that, I guess I assumed that it WAS a pastiche. The tone of the movie starts spr srs with the french farmhouse and is deconstructed in...

I still think it's retarded. So fucking retarded. But it's retarded in that funny beavis and butthead way. DETH. KLOK. I rarely laugh at this show but I am usually entertained. Shit is metal to the power of metal.

Workin in th coal mine goin down down down down whoop! I wanna sit down

I also expected Chalky to git got. I never really understood why he made Dunn his 2nd in the show. My guess is that the actor was just supposed to be a 1off scene with chalky in the jailhouse, and they liked him enough to give him a bigger part. That Eli shit made me cringe. God damn. How...

THIS IS ILL ADVISED. I assume drugs, because dating a 40 year old muslim negro wouldn't be something you are able to hide on facebook. But basically the mother wants to read her daughters diary. All that said, it's got to be easier than downloading some steal ur goldz keylogger. Clear...

Was it flowers of happiness that tried to buy a decom missile silo and form a commune in it? I don't remember -- but I do remember it wasn't actually that much money. I mean more than a normal person has. But normal people don't but decom missile silo complexes to repurpose as a commune...

See, a smarter man would have just eloped. It's not that she wanted the bigger wedding. It's that she was making you pay for making her wait. Women are devious, dude.

I imagine it's one of those things that they don't tell a President about for reasons of "plausible deniability". The problem with beauracracy is that there are so many rooms some of those rooms will only be looked at once every ten years. If you're doing stuff that you can't admit to, you...

Mock it if you want to, but I will bet you that she behaves herself now.

The military wasn't exactly in lock-step. For the most part they were not, they just didn't want to commit a coup. For one thing, God knows what happens if they did that, so caution was wisdom and for another thing there is a reasonable expectation that no one could possibly bethatinsane. The...

It's just reaching the point -- have you ever listened to an 8 year old tell a story? He'll tell a little bit of it and then run out of the idea but he wants to keep talking and then the next big bad guy.. he's BIGGER and BADDER. It's part of the problem with the Thrawn fan-fic. Not that by...

There is one point at which I can agree with Grim whole heartedly. Hillary would have been better at implementing the ACA. But even as intermittently and strangely bloodthirsty as Obummer has turned out to be, I think Hillary would have fucked us RIGHT when it came to uses of our military...

Most musicians aren't that kind of household name. I'm pretty sure Lou Reed was happy with the fame he both deserved and earned, and I believe listening to his music that he achieved the artistic dream of shitting exactly where he wanted to. When everyone else was playing acid-rock, talking...

And this is why you never trust a libertarian. They're nothing but dishonest anarchists. And anarchists are nothing but dishonest communists.

Too rapid a shift. These things have their own momentum and the g forces would tear the constituency and the leadership apart in a shift like that. Political agendas can and do change, but when they change that rapidly the party doing it suffers in influence. Influence is the bottom line in...

That's just nonsensical. It would take millions to crew that juggernaut. I mean seriously, even if they're cloned, especially if they're cloned, what the fuck would be the point? Why even fight over planets and planetary governments if you're able to build and maintain something that...

I hope the marble salesman doctor is a completely sarcastic dick.

This thread is dildos

You don't inhale cigars. You don't need to. Trollface is gonna be pukin'.