2023 AssHat Voting round 3

Araysar vs. Lightning Lord Rule - Araysar has really been putting in a yearlong effort to win this, but he actually doesn't want to win this. Attaching the term 'Asshat' to all of his analysis is really going to dent his credibility. "Oh, the certified and verified village Asshat thinks this about the Civil War?? Haha, whatever... ASSHAT!" I'm not sure he's thought that one through.

Ambiturner vs. Lanx - the closest matchup of this round. Lanx has been doing a lot of work all year, but he occasionally can be pretty funny, like a lot of morons. Ambiturner RARELY brings the lulz though, at least in comparison. So it looks like Sergeant Stick Time takes it over Bruce REEEE.

Pharmakos vs. Boozecube - I got a PM last night from a null account saying I had to vote this way. I'm legit a little rattled.

Tuco vs. Foler - while losing a bet to Araysar is so shameful I can barely imagine it happening, come on, this is Foler we're talking about here. It would shake his confidence so hard to win this tournament and have all his shit opinions not only branded as Foler, but grade A USFOHDA Certified Asshat Prime. Delicious.

Mr. Sox vs. BrutulTM - I almost feel bad for Mr. Sox, this feels like picking on the legit retard. Fortunately it's just an almost. As for Brutul, better luck next year bro, I think you can win this thing if you just post a little more often.

Mist vs. Kirun - the second closest matchup of this round. Mist is still 73.709% insufferable eeyore woe-is-me, but the remainder has actually gotten semi-respectable. Oh look, a black cat. Kirun on the other hand is really pushing the whole edgelord thing in almost every thread. It's part Ossoi preening over his abs type shit, part standard misanthropic ramblings, and part garden variety idiocy. Every once in a while though a kernel of sense peeks through the veneer hinting that the whole thing is likely a schtick. It's just enough to keep you guessing. Oh look, a black cat. So, with both of those things in mind, I'll go with the guy who's trying too hard in perhaps a stunning upset.

wormie vs. lurkingdirk - despite trying his damndest to make it to the elite 8 by fucking up both the counts AND the brackets, lurkingdirk can't hold a candle to wormie here. Just as a thought experiment, eliminating him would decrease worldwide anti-semitism by approximately .75% and increase worldwide Jewish average IQ by 7 points. If that's not worth an Asshat vote, I don't know what is!

Chris vs. RobXIII - Rob has actually toned down his act over the years, or at least it seems like it to me. Maybe I just haven't seen a lot of his posts? Either way, Chris may have done enough work to actually come out of the Eastern conference this year. Dude's an Asshat Unstoppable Force.