Iirc, you're older than me. This Theoden GIF is the exact representation of what it will feel like when you fuck someone 15+ years younger than you.
I won't refute this.
So the first woman I wound up having sex with post wife was something else. She was kind of a bigger girl (but not big big, I don't even know if big is the right description), pretty face, big boobs. Outgoing, but super wholesome. She was a big fan of trivia nights and fucking needlepoint. If anything her demeanor reminded me of the secretary in Ferris Bueller's Day Off. She was 35 I think?, has a couple of kids, been divorced 2 years maybe? Texting was fine. We went out and got a drink and then dinner. Conversation is good. She starts getting handsy, and one thing leads to another...
This chick that I thought was straight out of Leave It To Beaver fucked like a demon. She was out of fucking control. She told me to bite her boobs and then she sent me pictures of the bruises the next day. I was un-fucking prepared.
We hooked up a couple of times, but it ended because she came on too strong (I've gone out on dates where I shit you not, when they find out I'm a widower they tell me they want to be a mom to my kids - this has happened at least 3 times
on the first date) and it was too soon after Tori passed that in hindsight I wasn't looking to get serious with anyone. Like I mentioned in the other thread - I didn't go out looking to get laid OR to settle down - I was just trying to feel like a human again. Which I was upfront with her about.
The events that really caused it to end was because I was a dumbass in 2 different ways and I deserve to be mocked and judged for both.
The second time we hooked up she told me she had an IUD and my retarded ass came inside her, I immediately freaked the fuck out after she left and could see my wife's life insurance going to the child of a one night stand. I didn't sleep at all that night. Obviously, I dodged that bullet, but I was a fucking idiot.
The second, was a day or so after that, I was itchy and saw some bumps around my junk. I thought to myself, "Oh my god, I've knocked this woman up AND she gave me fucking herpes." Here's the thing though, I've been a boxers guy for a long time, and I heard from some of my female friends, that might not be where it's at. So, I figured, I'd try out some boxer briefs. I did what any guy would do, I bought some cheap ones off of Amazon. Just to try them out. 100% polyester, not breathable, straight suffocation for my boys, and the weather was warm out. I had also thought I'd trim down there and then I just kept clipping and clipping and by the end of it I think I looked like a naked molerat resting on a flesh toned bean bag chair.
Welp, turned out she hadn't given me herpes, I had instead given myself jock itch, but at that point the ship had sailed and my time with her was done.