Dating

OU Ariakas said:

So now that I had the one date with the attractive girl that wants to see me again, I have started thinking real hard about this one. I used to be good at the bedroom side of stuff; but one of the main things that went wrong in my marriage was a lack of intimacy/desire. It hasn't been 2 years for me, but it might have been that long or longer since I felt like she and I are just going through the motions.

I almost want to go find some easy one and get the first strange out of the way to get back into the groove of a female that is excited to be with me. Damn this feels weird to be talking about.

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Iirc, you're older than me. This Theoden GIF is the exact representation of what it will feel like when you fuck someone 15+ years younger than you.

OU Ariakas said:

So now that I had the one date with the attractive girl that wants to see me again, I have started thinking real hard about this one. I used to be good at the bedroom side of stuff; but one of the main things that went wrong in my marriage was a lack of intimacy/desire. It hasn't been 2 years for me, but it might have been that long or longer since I felt like she and I are just going through the motions.

I almost want to go find some easy one and get the first strange out of the way to get back into the groove of a female that is excited to be with me. Damn this feels weird to be talking about.

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I did it just to take the pressure off and it worked like a charm. Just having it as a backup let me get out of my own head. And with HIMS being an app, you don't even have to do anything except press some buttons.

I'm sure you'll be fine, I just wanted to take the chance out of the equation.

OU Ariakas said:

So now that I had the one date with the attractive girl that wants to see me again, I have started thinking real hard about this one. I used to be good at the bedroom side of stuff; but one of the main things that went wrong in my marriage was a lack of intimacy/desire. It hasn't been 2 years for me, but it might have been that long or longer since I felt like she and I are just going through the motions.

I almost want to go find some easy one and get the first strange out of the way to get back into the groove of a female that is excited to be with me. Damn this feels weird to be talking about.

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Dunno, there's something to be said about casual sex and it doing more harm than anything. Like I think if you get with her there's going to be the excitement of someone you date and get it on with and want to do a good job. Vs lets say you go and hit up some high end escorts or something. You just desensitize yourself to the point where oh hey here's a naked lady, and it is kinda as you said going through the motions. When I was younger, was kinda my experience as far as best sex was with someone I'm with ongoing, the one night stands unless it's just a really good steamy drunken meet up maybe. Generally I found the 1-2 timers whern't as great because you don't have the built up knowledge of each others likes and rhythm or however the fuck to say it.

Like too much to unpack with your wife and initmacy but as we ebb and flow up and down ourselves a bit. Even if you dont feel it, she is much more won over and happy when I'm keeping up with doing various dumb small things like the kiss on the forehead, doing all the affirmation bullshit women need. And after bedroom time actually laying there a bit rather than just racing off to clean up/shower/go about your day/night.

Daidraco said:

Iirc, you're older than me. This Theoden GIF is the exact representation of what it will feel like when you fuck someone 15+ years younger than you.

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I won't refute this.

So the first woman I wound up having sex with post wife was something else. She was kind of a bigger girl (but not big big, I don't even know if big is the right description), pretty face, big boobs. Outgoing, but super wholesome. She was a big fan of trivia nights and fucking needlepoint. If anything her demeanor reminded me of the secretary in Ferris Bueller's Day Off. She was 35 I think?, has a couple of kids, been divorced 2 years maybe? Texting was fine. We went out and got a drink and then dinner. Conversation is good. She starts getting handsy, and one thing leads to another...

This chick that I thought was straight out of Leave It To Beaver fucked like a demon. She was out of fucking control. She told me to bite her boobs and then she sent me pictures of the bruises the next day. I was un-fucking prepared.

We hooked up a couple of times, but it ended because she came on too strong (I've gone out on dates where I shit you not, when they find out I'm a widower they tell me they want to be a mom to my kids - this has happened at least 3 times on the first date) and it was too soon after Tori passed that in hindsight I wasn't looking to get serious with anyone. Like I mentioned in the other thread - I didn't go out looking to get laid OR to settle down - I was just trying to feel like a human again. Which I was upfront with her about.

The events that really caused it to end was because I was a dumbass in 2 different ways and I deserve to be mocked and judged for both.

The second time we hooked up she told me she had an IUD and my retarded ass came inside her, I immediately freaked the fuck out after she left and could see my wife's life insurance going to the child of a one night stand. I didn't sleep at all that night. Obviously, I dodged that bullet, but I was a fucking idiot.

The second, was a day or so after that, I was itchy and saw some bumps around my junk. I thought to myself, "Oh my god, I've knocked this woman up AND she gave me fucking herpes." Here's the thing though, I've been a boxers guy for a long time, and I heard from some of my female friends, that might not be where it's at. So, I figured, I'd try out some boxer briefs. I did what any guy would do, I bought some cheap ones off of Amazon. Just to try them out. 100% polyester, not breathable, straight suffocation for my boys, and the weather was warm out. I had also thought I'd trim down there and then I just kept clipping and clipping and by the end of it I think I looked like a naked molerat resting on a flesh toned bean bag chair.

Welp, turned out she hadn't given me herpes, I had instead given myself jock itch, but at that point the ship had sailed and my time with her was done.

OU Ariakas said:

Another hot one I feel like I want to see has all the signs of a trust fund baby. She has 4 kids, no job, plays tennis, and told me about the three different vacation spots they go to every year. I don't known if my growing-up-poor ass could even date her.

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Dude, you’re dating a neurosurgeon’s wife.

Don’t worry they’ll be too busy to hunt you down anyway.

KDow said:

I won't refute this.

So the first woman I wound up having sex with post wife was something else. She was kind of a bigger girl (but not big big, I don't even know if big is the right description), pretty face, big boobs. Outgoing, but super wholesome. She was a big fan of trivia nights and fucking needlepoint. If anything her demeanor reminded me of the secretary in Ferris Bueller's Day Off. She was 35 I think?, has a couple of kids, been divorced 2 years maybe? Texting was fine. We went out and got a drink and then dinner. Conversation is good. She starts getting handsy, and one thing leads to another...

This chick that I thought was straight out of Leave It To Beaver fucked like a demon. She was out of fucking control. She told me to bite her boobs and then she sent me pictures of the bruises the next day. I was un-fucking prepared.

We hooked up a couple of times, but it ended because she came on too strong (I've gone out on dates where I shit you not, when they find out I'm a widower they tell me they want to be a mom to my kids - this has happened at least 3 times on the first date) and it was too soon after Tori passed that in hindsight I wasn't looking to get serious with anyone. Like I mentioned in the other thread - I didn't go out looking to get laid OR to settle down - I was just trying to feel like a human again. Which I was upfront with her about.

The events that really caused it to end was because I was a dumbass in 2 different ways and I deserve to be mocked and judged for both.

The second time we hooked up she told me she had an IUD and my retarded ass came inside her, I immediately freaked the fuck out after she left and could see my wife's life insurance going to the child of a one night stand. I didn't sleep at all that night. Obviously, I dodged that bullet, but I was a fucking idiot.

The second, was a day or so after that, I was itchy and saw some bumps around my junk. I thought to myself, "Oh my god, I've knocked this woman up AND she gave me fucking herpes." Here's the thing though, I've been a boxers guy for a long time, and I heard from some of my female friends, that might not be where it's at. So, I figured, I'd try out some boxer briefs. I did what any guy would do, I bought some cheap ones off of Amazon. Just to try them out. 100% polyester, not breathable, straight suffocation for my boys, and the weather was warm out. I had also thought I'd trim down there and then I just kept clipping and clipping and by the end of it I think I looked like a naked molerat resting on a flesh toned bean bag chair.

Welp, turned out she hadn't given me herpes, I had instead given myself jock itch, but at that point the ship had sailed and my time with her was done.

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I feel like we should see the bruised titty. Or titties. Yeah.

Hoss said:

make sure she gets at least one

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One? Exhaust the fuck out of her (literally) before you even start. Then she'll be thankful it was only 30 seconds.

Theres one thing Ive noticed about myself over the years, related to the conversation at hand. When I first started dating my ex - I had no problem getting my shit up. We fucked like rabbits for years. Then, when she (and regrettably, myself too at the time), got fat, I all of a sudden had problems getting my shit up. I thought it was health related, honestly. Fast forward to when we broke up, and Im still a fat/unhealthy POS, and my ex before that ex hooks up with me. Low and fucking behold - we fucked like rabbits. Didnt leave my house for DAYS. She was still just as fucking hot as she was when I met her, and she had just broke up with her boyfriend too. Ill take that "im lonely" rebound any fucking day of the week from that specific ex.

Fast forward a bit more to this part of my life. Ive taken the gym to its heights, my health and diet is extremely healthy, obnoxiously muscular with ultra low body fat. When I started dating DATING again, I noticed something. The girls that I was in my head about.. "Ok, so shes a 5? a 6? But fuck man... I know she'd be a good mom." or "pfftt... Shes got a really good job and seems really responsible. Would probably help me clean up all my immaturity" etc. ... I couldnt get my shit up occasionally.
...
I can blame that on the fact that Im thinking about that "thoughtful" shit. But then I met a woman thats the exact same age as me (generally a negative in my mind), blonde, blue eyed, divorced cause her husband cheated, literal fucking knock out. Goes to the gym. Has friends that arent whores. Nurse practitioner. Just fucking has all my check boxes... and I had ZERO fucking problems getting my shit up and the even bigger "I'm going to fuck this up" in my head? Shes literally getting me fucking wasted on Woodford Reserve all fucking night. That night, I was sitting there thinking... Im going to have whiskey dick. I have to.. I HAVE TO skip out on this. ... Well fuckin fuck if she didnt pull me inside her place and .. thankfully, I had no "issues." (We dated for like two weeks. Im too conservative or some other liberal BS if you're curious where that went.)

Im not saying there arent general health issues out there that limit blood flow, or that there arent other similar problems. But I STRONGLY feel like most guys erection issues stem from the fact that they just arent attracted to their partner anymore. .. I just dont know what to do with that information for those of you that are like 10+ years invested into what has essentially become your life partner that you'd rather die than lose.

Daidraco

Wasn't someone supposed to post some tits recently promised?

OU Ariakas said:

Quick update. I have gone out on dates with 5 different women so far. Every one of them has been a completely pleasant and enjoyable experience. The stories I have heard from them about the guys they date make me confident that I will be able to be some of their top experiences since the bar other men set is so extremely fucking low. It seems too easy.

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By all means, stay confident. But thats the trope of women 26+. Not once have I heard a "scorned" woman in that age range accept responsibility for their own faults. "Yea, I cheated. But he was just always so busy with work!" "He had no goals and just came home and went straight to bed every night! (as she doesnt work at all and drives a G-Wagon)." etc. etc.

Im not saying that you, or I, dont have our own faults. But recognize the blatant lies and lack of maturity for what they are.

OU Ariakas said:

I don't think I'm far enough down the line with any of them for those stories yet, I was just talking about first-date chatter about other bad dates they had been on. Usually we are talking about guys that wouldn't carry a simple conversation or that would go for a kiss or something after being told that another date wasn't in the cards. I meant that they have all been pleasant experiences and not unpleasant conversation about how shitty their ex/life/job is.

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Any action?