Depression

Vaclav

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Your issues sound more like something in the here and now and not the decades of regret that I saddle myself with whenever I let myself think too much. There's nothing triggering it - it's just the same place I've been in many times before.
Dunno man, your dad's "playing along with it" thing really hit home with me - that's always me - nervous in crowds etc. If I hear someone talking in a room even looking remotely in my direction I worry they're being critical of me (just random people). Etc.

I've been bottling alot of emotion for a long damn time.

Your brother sounds like shit. I hope you rubbed your webs on his face.
No webs anymore - there's corrective surgery for webbed hands - so my hands look normal from afar - but they're stunted as hell for use, pinky is one long fused bone (about half the length of a normal pinky), rings only really have the muscle to move the bottom joint others just hang there (and one of those joints is backwards can't bend the tip forward, just backward if I move it with another finger), index both have a ~15 degree curve towards the ring finger but are otherwise slightly usable.

But yea, I'm considering burning bridges with him over it - never been elitist over the fact that the only genetic child amongst the three of us - asshole brother and sister should've been left at the orphanage as far as I'm concerned these days. At least I can get a laugh out of the fact grandfather didn't consider them worthy of inheritance as adopted kids now. Before I used to think it was shitty - but I can see why now.
 

bixxby

Molten Core Raider
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Worry about burning bridges later man, doesn't seem like something else to heap on the pile now.
 

Vaclav

Bronze Baronet of the Realm
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Worry about burning bridges later man, doesn't seem like something else to heap on the pile now.
Well bridges will be burnt if I don't show for sure. Sitting in with the doctor now and he's saying up to 72 hrs i'll be stuck. If so I'll have to miss it I think. Can't drive it in that time.
 

Rope

Silver Knight of the Realm
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Man, fucking shit just continues to mount - and still waiting to hear back on a few funeral preparations so still can't hospitalize quite yet. Fucking brother, my idol for my entire goddamn life just tore into me because I had the nerve to ask him if he could help me to tie my tie for the funeral or if I should instead buy a clip-on while I'm doing my shopping for a new pair of shoes (ruined my dress shoes in the move) - had the nerve to say "Hey, you're an adult man - why don't you watch a YouTube video on how to and learn"

[For those that don't keep up on my stuff - I've got digital syndactyly - webbed fingers, which basically makes anything besides my pointer and thumb useless and very hard to use - tying shoes are pretty difficult for me as is and that's easy to see versus reversed in the mirror with no real slack to keep it in place, etc]

Also keep in mind this was something that my Dad had always assisted me with tying ties when I was attending any event on my family's side that I needed to wear a tie. So I had the sting of remembering that I'm going to have this problem because he's gone, and then I had the joy of being insulted over my genetic condition that he's been aware of for 38 years that it somehow makes me "not an adult" because I can't magically regrow my fucking fingers, from my goddamn idol.
Your brother is not your new dad and he is in NO FUCKING WAY responsible for you in any way. Jesus christ, you can tie a tie pretty fucking easy with a thumb and pointer.
 

lindz

#DDs
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Asking a brother for help tying a tie for your father's funeral is not too much to ask. FFS thanks for coming out just to be a total dick.
 

Rope

Silver Knight of the Realm
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I didn't read it as a once in a life time request. It reeked of dependency and it shouldn't fall on the brother to fill the roll of the recently departed father. It might have been an innocence request but holyshit, "burning bridges"? He wouldn't tie my tie so fuck him? Guess what, his brother's father also died, maybe he could also get a break.
 

OneofOne

Silver Baronet of the Realm
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"A therapist is not a very important person to nonclients." is complete bullshit. If you can't understand why that's so, you're seriously going into the wrong field.
 

Eidal

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I think dabamf's point is that a therapist develops a relationship with the patient that includes privileged information. If the therapist then renders harsh criticism, the patient may react terribly because of the feeling that he confided in someone for help and now he's being crucified for his sins. Compare/contrast to [random therapist on internet]. There has been zero development of a bond/relationship and zero exchange of privileged information. It's just a guy on the internet.

Personally, I don't tell anyone to "go kill themselves" just because it doesn't seem very pleasant or constructive... but I wouldn't shed a tear for someone who offed themselves at the faux-encouragement of an online persona who claims to work in the field. Come on now -- we're all internet vets. Freaking out about "bedside manner" is the same as faking an injury in soccer. Grow a pair.
 

TheBeagle

JunkiesNetwork Donor
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Dabamf - You can't spend a considerable amount of your posting efforts here on RR building your credentials as a psych expert in the late stages of grad school who knows the literature and knows the different courses of action that people in theDepressionthread have available to them and give advice to those people and then turn around and call yourself "a random person on the internet".

That's bullshit and you are smart enough to know it's bullshit.

You can't write this sentence.....
Vaclav, I'd be happy to help look for a good therapist in your area if you want to pm me the city you live in or a zip code. My choosing criteria is basically (1) theoretical orientation (CBT is safest bet for depression, though not designed for just helping to cope with a particularly stressful time, it that's what you're looking for), (2)good training program and (3)website bio
and then turn and go "Har Har guys, I was just fucking around, don't listen to me, I'm just a random dude on the internetz!!"

Either give advice and own up to your position as someone that speaks authoritatively on the subject or STFU and stick to Screenshots.
 

OneofOne

Silver Baronet of the Realm
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^^ pretty much. Anyone know where he goes to school? I'd like to call up and and show them just how awesome he really is. And I'm serious. I would never get into someone's RL shit on this forum, but he's literally going to have life and death power over people's lives, and he neither understands that nor takes it seriously.
 

Draegan_sl

2 Minutes Hate
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I have no idea what is going on in this thread, but if you start to go after someone in real life you will be permanently banned.
 

Tenks

Bronze Knight of the Realm
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^^ pretty much. Anyone know where he goes to school? I'd like to call up and and show them just how awesome he really is. And I'm serious. I would never get into someone's RL shit on this forum, but he's literally going to have life and death power over people's lives, and he neither understands that nor takes it seriously.
Even saying this should be a perma bannable offense imo. Shit like this should be taken seriously people should be free to post whatever they want without having to worry about internet warriors getting into their real life shit.
 

Tuco

I got Tuco'd!
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I hope you're happy.

deleted_sl said:
OneofOne, I'm going to talk to you uncharacteristically normal now (ie as I would in real life, not on the internet). I understand the internet is full of hyperbole, but your threat has me literally shaking as I type this, because people in liberal phd programs in mental health care do not understand what forums like this are for and that real life personas are not the same as internet personas. They would read this and conclude that every single poster is seriously disturbed. I am asking you right now to remind yourself that the way people act and talk on the internet is not the same as the way they are in real life. I am infuriated that you would even think about trying to ruin my life because of a few posts you read on the internet. But I am sure you are a reasonable person in real life. My original post about kreugen, as I mentioned, was done in an attempt to poke him a bit into something that might spark him seeking help. It was done to help him. You are free to criticize the method, that's fine. My latest reply to you was obviously a troll, because I was frustrated at your posts.

I care immensely about my clients. I put more time and effort into preparing my sessions than do anyone in my cohort. I'm excited when I wake up in the mornings on days I see clients, and the thought that I can play a major role in helping someone, especially with anxiety and/or depression, as I relate to them most closely, is an amazing thought.

Please do not attempt to ruin my real life over a few posts you find objectionable. Please do not encourage others to do the same. This is human deleted, not internet deleted speaking to you.

I'm asking mods to delete my account forever. I'm praying they agree. I've had a long battle in my head as to whether it is worth it to continue posting here with the history this forum has had in interfering with people's real life. I knew I cannot afford someone with a vendetta trying to ruin my life, but figured I never rustle jimmies enough to motivate someone to do that. But I knew that if that time ever came, or even a suggestion of it, I'd be out of here. I worked way too hard to get to where I am.

So to everyone else, it's been a pleasure. I will probably come back but won't ever post in the depression thread or let out any details of my real identity again. I was pretty stoked about having a depression thread where I can share my knowledge and hopefully help people. I've been teasing with the idea of starting a general psychology/mental health thread where I post random cool stuff I learn, but I guess that won't happen. Anyway, peace
 

Tenks

Bronze Knight of the Realm
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Sad to see him go. I have the unique positioning of having actually known Dabamf in real life and the amount of work he's gone through to get to where he is today even if its only via social media updates. The amount of passion he's always had for the field. I understand his position in wanting to completely remove himself from this situation if even there is the slightest chance of someone interfering with it.
 

Frenzied Wombat

Potato del Grande
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Anybody that threatens to seek or expose the real life identify of anybody on these forums should be permanently banned imho. It directly challenges the integrity of these boards, and puts in jeopardy the life/career of the person being threatened. We all have the ability to directly speak our minds on these forums due to anonymity, and that's one of the primary things that makes these forums thrive. If everything had to be written in a way that could endure public scrutiny, these forums would be a politically correct morass of boredom.