Girls who broke your heart thread
- Thread starter Aychamo BanBan
- Start date
Eomer
Trakanon Raider
- 5,472
- 272
Grumpus
Molten Core Raider
- 1,927
- 223
Oh and some details. We started chatting after the Game Of Thrones finale since she reads the books and is about where I am. We chatted a couple times for a 2-3 hrs at a time. She actually initiated talks about doing something outside of the gym. I assume that means shes interested. The age difference being the only variable that would make me think different.
trex
Queen Bee
- 1,125
- 825
Idk why you"re so worried about the age thing. I"m 5 years younger than my bf and sure, sometimes I"m really annoying but most of the time I"m pretty bearable.
I mean, to be with a girl and then have it not work out "because she is just too young" is one thing but you seem pretty terrified to even try.
I mean, to be with a girl and then have it not work out "because she is just too young" is one thing but you seem pretty terrified to even try.
Grumpus
Molten Core Raider
- 1,927
- 223
Kinda this. The last 2ish years for me have been a fuck buddy phase with people around my age. I"m used to "Hey your single, wanna fool around to fill that space till you find someone decent"Kirun said:
Not really what im looking for with this new chick since we actually have things to talk about other then sex.
I"m just rusty at giving a fuck I think.
Eomer
Trakanon Raider
- 5,472
- 272
Yeah, it"s all relative as well. Big difference between 30/25 and 25/20, for example. I"d say guys under 25 are pretty big idiots as well, too, but perhaps not to the same extent as girls are crazy.Kirun said:
Let"s try this: it"s also really creepy for a 35 year old to fuck a 16 year old.
not sure if believe.
Zehnpai
Molten Core Raider
- 399
- 1,245
No, those never go away.
What happens is you start wanting a baby and so you start looking to secure a man who will
1 - Impregnate you
2 - Support you
3 - Stay with you
This causes the relationship "fight of flight" reflex to generally ignore the flight mechanic so you"re more willing to ignore your own crazy reflexes that cause you to do stupid shit like tell a guy that you"re "not ready for a relationship" and then go out and get a new boyfriend 30 minutes later.
The crazy never goes away I"m afraid. It"s just instead of telling a guy that you think you need some "alone time to get to know yourself" when you want to fuck anything that moves for awhile, you lie, tell him nothing is wrong and wait until he leaves for work to start scanning craigslist personals for NSA flings.
What happens is you start wanting a baby and so you start looking to secure a man who will
1 - Impregnate you
2 - Support you
3 - Stay with you
This causes the relationship "fight of flight" reflex to generally ignore the flight mechanic so you"re more willing to ignore your own crazy reflexes that cause you to do stupid shit like tell a guy that you"re "not ready for a relationship" and then go out and get a new boyfriend 30 minutes later.
The crazy never goes away I"m afraid. It"s just instead of telling a guy that you think you need some "alone time to get to know yourself" when you want to fuck anything that moves for awhile, you lie, tell him nothing is wrong and wait until he leaves for work to start scanning craigslist personals for NSA flings.
Only funny because it"s true and been posted about hundreds of times in this thread.Zehn - Vhex said:
Ok, thread"s been dead for a while, guess I"ll post for advice.
I"m currently seeing 4 different girls. I"d never once dated more than one girl at a time previous. And actually spent August-April without a single date.
Ok, so this one girl. N. she got a cute face, but is overweight. She"s basically the borderline between chubby and fat. Kinda at the limits of what I find physically attractive. She talked about recently losing 20 lbs on our first date, so she definitely was fat before, but if she lost ANOTHER 20 lbs, she"d actually be really cute and If she lost 40 lbs I think I could even safely call her hot and not get made fun of on the Internet.
Anyways, the story and question isn"t really about that.
Thursday, I took her out for first date after talking online for a couple hours (we met on okcupid), had a great time at a habachi place, great conversation, I think we"ve got a lot in common... we talk for an hour outside the restaurant afterwards, I say we should def meet again.
I go out with 2 different girls on friday, so I don"t talk to her at all.
Saturday, she texts me and asks if I"m doing anything or got any plans tonight. I tell her no, she asks if I want to go to a surprise party, she tells me it"s going to be a bunch of people she"s not really friends, and at a country western dance club, which isn"t either her or my style and would like me to come along for support. I say sure.
I show up, and I"m walking in at the same time as her and her parents... what she didn"t really explain was that it was "her" surprise party that she was inviting me to. At first it was really awkward because it was like her entire family there (parents aunts and uncles and stuff) but as the night wore on, a couple of her friends (who are closer to our age) showed up so it was all good.
Ok so 3 questions I humbly ask the collective enlightened wisdom of fohss.
1) Do I give this girl a chance because she"s evidently losing weight and caring more about her personal appearance (her younger sister, who I met at the party, is literally a 10, She"s like a 5), but if she lost 30lbs would probably be an 8 (like I said, very cute face, just covered in fat). Or should I just accept the fact that I"m not really attracted to bigger girls and move on. She"s exactly 1 month older than me, is it too much to ask a girl turning 30 to change who she is just to date?
2) Looks versus personality. I like this girl, I really do, but I"m not really that attracted to her, and wouldn"t mind just being friends. She"s a "hardcore gamer" even though she plays very different games than me, I like hearing her stories, and having her talk to me in language I can understand. Girls do this to guys without even batting an eyelash, why does it make me feel like an asshole just for even thinking it.
3) The fact that she didn"t tell me her parents were going to be at this party, or emphasize the fact that it was "her" surprise party, I had only kissed her on the cheek after the first date, I def feel a little bit of the crazy is inside her if she"s having me meet her parents after just 1 date and only 2 days later.
Last summer I dated a certifiably crazy chick, but at least I fucked her before she introduced me to her parents after only a week, so I could see why she felt like moving things along fast.
I"m currently seeing 4 different girls. I"d never once dated more than one girl at a time previous. And actually spent August-April without a single date.
Ok, so this one girl. N. she got a cute face, but is overweight. She"s basically the borderline between chubby and fat. Kinda at the limits of what I find physically attractive. She talked about recently losing 20 lbs on our first date, so she definitely was fat before, but if she lost ANOTHER 20 lbs, she"d actually be really cute and If she lost 40 lbs I think I could even safely call her hot and not get made fun of on the Internet.
Anyways, the story and question isn"t really about that.
Thursday, I took her out for first date after talking online for a couple hours (we met on okcupid), had a great time at a habachi place, great conversation, I think we"ve got a lot in common... we talk for an hour outside the restaurant afterwards, I say we should def meet again.
I go out with 2 different girls on friday, so I don"t talk to her at all.
Saturday, she texts me and asks if I"m doing anything or got any plans tonight. I tell her no, she asks if I want to go to a surprise party, she tells me it"s going to be a bunch of people she"s not really friends, and at a country western dance club, which isn"t either her or my style and would like me to come along for support. I say sure.
I show up, and I"m walking in at the same time as her and her parents... what she didn"t really explain was that it was "her" surprise party that she was inviting me to. At first it was really awkward because it was like her entire family there (parents aunts and uncles and stuff) but as the night wore on, a couple of her friends (who are closer to our age) showed up so it was all good.
Ok so 3 questions I humbly ask the collective enlightened wisdom of fohss.
1) Do I give this girl a chance because she"s evidently losing weight and caring more about her personal appearance (her younger sister, who I met at the party, is literally a 10, She"s like a 5), but if she lost 30lbs would probably be an 8 (like I said, very cute face, just covered in fat). Or should I just accept the fact that I"m not really attracted to bigger girls and move on. She"s exactly 1 month older than me, is it too much to ask a girl turning 30 to change who she is just to date?
2) Looks versus personality. I like this girl, I really do, but I"m not really that attracted to her, and wouldn"t mind just being friends. She"s a "hardcore gamer" even though she plays very different games than me, I like hearing her stories, and having her talk to me in language I can understand. Girls do this to guys without even batting an eyelash, why does it make me feel like an asshole just for even thinking it.
3) The fact that she didn"t tell me her parents were going to be at this party, or emphasize the fact that it was "her" surprise party, I had only kissed her on the cheek after the first date, I def feel a little bit of the crazy is inside her if she"s having me meet her parents after just 1 date and only 2 days later.
Last summer I dated a certifiably crazy chick, but at least I fucked her before she introduced me to her parents after only a week, so I could see why she felt like moving things along fast.
Grumpus
Molten Core Raider
- 1,927
- 223
If you aren"t into bigger chicks don"t date any that are remotely close or are in the process of losing weight.
The greater chance is that once shes settled into a long term relationship she will gain it all back or more.
Stick to girls who are naturally active if that bothers you. Chubby girls and former fatties are to much of a risk for relapse when they have a dude snagged.
Unfortunately looks matter no matter how much BS people tell themselves. Play it safe bro.
The greater chance is that once shes settled into a long term relationship she will gain it all back or more.
Stick to girls who are naturally active if that bothers you. Chubby girls and former fatties are to much of a risk for relapse when they have a dude snagged.
Unfortunately looks matter no matter how much BS people tell themselves. Play it safe bro.
Ok, but I"m not like a health freak or anything.... What if this girl just needed a reason to learn to be more active. I mean, I played sports in school, but didn"t "really learn" about fitness until I joined the military, and even then it was more of a forced on me thing than something I did willingly. The self-motivation for staying fit only came about when I realized that women care just as much about looks as guys do and I began applying the things I"d learned earlier in life.Grumpus said:
I mean, she"s def a hardcore nerd, so I think maybe she just didn"t have any motivation to become skinny before? But if she found the motivation to lose weight, wouldn"t she continue losing weight because it got her out of the house and dating?
edit: and couldn"t I encourage that by planning dates around "physical activities" like hiking in the park, walking the dog at the beach, etc?