Nora"s not interested in you, Jenny is. Even if Nora is into you (she"s not) she"d be betraying her friendship with Jenny. Good girlfriends don"t do that shit to each other. You didn"t miss the "Nora train," there never was one.
Girls who broke your heart thread
- Thread starter Aychamo BanBan
- Start date
There are years of history here but I"ll make this short. I fell hard for my best friend and we had a nasty falling out last year (I think part of it was due to her bf at the time although she denied that she also told me when we became friends again he gave her shit when she added me back on FB and hated the fact we were friends). Anyhow, she starts talking to him because he was about to move (he"s been gone over a month now) and all of a sudden she starts being very stand-offish with me. I tagged her in some photos right after he got added back on her FB and she quickly deactivated her account, the next morning me and all of my friends (mainly mine but kind of mutual) are blocked. Skipping a few parts I end up messaging him because I"m pissed as hell at her for pulling this shit again and vaguely hinted that she did shit behind his back. We go back in forth in texts for a few days then I left her alone. Apparently she changed her number that weekend (I found out from her friend a month later when her friend (mutual) tried to tell me she had to do it because I wouldn"t leave her alone which was bullshit)
Anyhow, run in to her that Monday and said I wanted my books back (she borrowed) and she tells me to fuck off, so I"m pretty shocked at this point and was like wtf, you started all of this. She ends up pushing me so I pushed her away (not hard), she comes back and slaps me in the face, tried to kick me in the balls and threw a drink on me. First I kind of wanted to talk about it, she was my best friend, now I"m kind of shocked she is this mad (I didn"t know she changed her number then) and annoyed so went back to fuck you mode so when she went back into the club (her favorite and she was flirting with the DJ there), I went back and talked to the owner and had her thrown out. After that we"ve had no contact at all for 6 weeks now except 1 conversation I had with her friend which I"m sure was relayed to her.
My stance on it was basically this, she started this by lying to me, blocking me on facebook for no reason (we specifically have talked about ignoring and it sets her off just like it sets me off so she KNEW that it was going to piss me off). Messaging the dude was wrong, I admit that, but I feel she needs to take some responsibility for starting all of this. She did something she knew would set me off. I"m pretty sure she didn"t want this to happen and the guy was the reason she did it, but she claims up and down he had nothing to do with it so going on that line of reasoning, I feel she wanted to kick me and my friends to the curb so my stance to her friend was she isn"t welcome around. The girl she goes out with likes one of my friends so that"s usually how everyone meets up. Anyhow, I"ve completely left her alone for the last 6 weeks now but this past Saturday she ran into my friends downtown and came to an after party she knew I was at (they told her I was there). Then she proceeded to ignore me the entire night, even in mutual conversation making disgusted and annoyed looks if I said something in her direction.
I want to call our mutual friend (the girl she goes out with that likes my friend) and say that she is welcome to come out with us IF she treats me with respect as a human being (she won"t). She doesn"t need to be friends with me but if you"re going to hang out in the same group of people at least don"t maliciously ignore me. I think I have that right since she blocked me on facebook and all of my friends PRIOR to me ever messaging that guy. She burned the bridge, not me. Obviously she is angry with me that I"ve tried to keep her from hanging out with the group but I think her anger is misdirected and she needs to take some responsibility for what she did. I"m sure she stayed home on quite a few nights she normally would"ve gone out and I wouldn"t be surprised if she is blaming me for that (probably afraid I would throw her out of another club but I did it because of how she reacted and it was the Monday after this happened so emotions were still high)
Anyhow, what do you guys think. Do you think I have the right to talk to her friend and tell her I don"t want her around unless she is going to be respectful to me? I"ve left her alone for a while now, I"m not showing up at her friends parties and while they are kind of "mutual" friends she blocked all of them on facebook too when she blocked me (I think she only did it to try to hide the fact she blocked me because she didn"t want me to know but she refused to admit that) so since she burned the bridge first I feel she should be the one who has to stay away if it makes me uncomfortable which it does. If she wants to be left alone that is her right, but I feel she should have to leave me alone too and that means staying away when I"m out with my friends. Just looking for another perspective here because I think she was out of line going to the party I was at and looking for a second opinion on how to proceed. Obviously I can"t contact her as I"m blocked on facebook still and she changed her number, but I can either talk to her friend which will definitely get back to her, leave it alone and just deal with her ignoring me, or say something to her the next time I see her which I"m sure I will soon if she came to the party.
Anyhow, run in to her that Monday and said I wanted my books back (she borrowed) and she tells me to fuck off, so I"m pretty shocked at this point and was like wtf, you started all of this. She ends up pushing me so I pushed her away (not hard), she comes back and slaps me in the face, tried to kick me in the balls and threw a drink on me. First I kind of wanted to talk about it, she was my best friend, now I"m kind of shocked she is this mad (I didn"t know she changed her number then) and annoyed so went back to fuck you mode so when she went back into the club (her favorite and she was flirting with the DJ there), I went back and talked to the owner and had her thrown out. After that we"ve had no contact at all for 6 weeks now except 1 conversation I had with her friend which I"m sure was relayed to her.
My stance on it was basically this, she started this by lying to me, blocking me on facebook for no reason (we specifically have talked about ignoring and it sets her off just like it sets me off so she KNEW that it was going to piss me off). Messaging the dude was wrong, I admit that, but I feel she needs to take some responsibility for starting all of this. She did something she knew would set me off. I"m pretty sure she didn"t want this to happen and the guy was the reason she did it, but she claims up and down he had nothing to do with it so going on that line of reasoning, I feel she wanted to kick me and my friends to the curb so my stance to her friend was she isn"t welcome around. The girl she goes out with likes one of my friends so that"s usually how everyone meets up. Anyhow, I"ve completely left her alone for the last 6 weeks now but this past Saturday she ran into my friends downtown and came to an after party she knew I was at (they told her I was there). Then she proceeded to ignore me the entire night, even in mutual conversation making disgusted and annoyed looks if I said something in her direction.
I want to call our mutual friend (the girl she goes out with that likes my friend) and say that she is welcome to come out with us IF she treats me with respect as a human being (she won"t). She doesn"t need to be friends with me but if you"re going to hang out in the same group of people at least don"t maliciously ignore me. I think I have that right since she blocked me on facebook and all of my friends PRIOR to me ever messaging that guy. She burned the bridge, not me. Obviously she is angry with me that I"ve tried to keep her from hanging out with the group but I think her anger is misdirected and she needs to take some responsibility for what she did. I"m sure she stayed home on quite a few nights she normally would"ve gone out and I wouldn"t be surprised if she is blaming me for that (probably afraid I would throw her out of another club but I did it because of how she reacted and it was the Monday after this happened so emotions were still high)
Anyhow, what do you guys think. Do you think I have the right to talk to her friend and tell her I don"t want her around unless she is going to be respectful to me? I"ve left her alone for a while now, I"m not showing up at her friends parties and while they are kind of "mutual" friends she blocked all of them on facebook too when she blocked me (I think she only did it to try to hide the fact she blocked me because she didn"t want me to know but she refused to admit that) so since she burned the bridge first I feel she should be the one who has to stay away if it makes me uncomfortable which it does. If she wants to be left alone that is her right, but I feel she should have to leave me alone too and that means staying away when I"m out with my friends. Just looking for another perspective here because I think she was out of line going to the party I was at and looking for a second opinion on how to proceed. Obviously I can"t contact her as I"m blocked on facebook still and she changed her number, but I can either talk to her friend which will definitely get back to her, leave it alone and just deal with her ignoring me, or say something to her the next time I see her which I"m sure I will soon if she came to the party.
Attempt to be the bigger man and deal with some crazy girl ignoring you... If you cant deal with someone ignoring you, well this will be impossible for you and this might be good practice in a good life skill (ignoring the crazy)
The fact that she"s ignoring you should make it easier... if she doesn"t actually ignore you, call her out on it in front of her(your) friends about how childish she is being about everything, then never bring it up again.
The fact that she"s ignoring you should make it easier... if she doesn"t actually ignore you, call her out on it in front of her(your) friends about how childish she is being about everything, then never bring it up again.
She already threw a drink on him and attempted to kick him in the gonads when he asked for his books back. Its not a potential shitstorm. It is a shitstorm.
Dont ever talk to her again, look at her or think about her. If she comes back, tell her to fuck off.
She is a crazy bitch.
She is a crazy bitch.
I suppose I meant more of a shitstorm, in that case...I mean, if she does something like that over some damn books, how would she react over public humiliation?Divinefactor said:
Engaging in a personal battle with an insane woman is a no win situation. But that one even contemplates doing so is indicative that you are not very bright or stable.
Shes going to fuck all your friends, shes is going to attack you in public, she is going to call your work. Why the fuck would you want to egg such a person on?
Yeah, give ultimatums to an insane twat that will show her! You just want to exert some power in her life. Being the gatekeeper of when/where she can kick it. Ignoring her and behaving as if she is a non-factor in your world is the best option.
Shes going to fuck all your friends, shes is going to attack you in public, she is going to call your work. Why the fuck would you want to egg such a person on?
Yeah, give ultimatums to an insane twat that will show her! You just want to exert some power in her life. Being the gatekeeper of when/where she can kick it. Ignoring her and behaving as if she is a non-factor in your world is the best option.
First maybe you should have given the long story after all cause if I"m reading this right you"re at fault here not her...correct me if I"m wrong.
Again maybe I"m wrong but that"s how I read it. It"s my opinion that you"re the one who"s in the wrong here, and if I was her I"d be pissed as fuck at you too.
You fell in love with a friend who was not single. You obviously told her in an attempt to be with her. You don"t think the boyfriend at the time has a right to be pissed? I would be, christ it happened to me and I was pissed. Personally I wouldn"t want my girlfriend hanging out with a guy who claims to be in love with her either...maybe I"m crazyMippo said:
You start sending messages to the boyfriend and are trying to start shit by insinuating that she fucked around on him, and you don"t think that"s fucked up? You don"t think she"d be pissed as all fucking get out when the boyfriend tells her what you said?Mippo said:
Again if I"m reading this right you sir started all this. You fell in love with someone who wasn"t single, and while that kind of shit happens, you told her thus starting the shitstorm you"re in.Mippo said:
Again you started it by telling her how you felt when she wasn"t single. She"s ignoring you and blocking you because of that and because she"s with the other guy. If she wanted to be with you she"d be with you, and not him. She chose him, and has every right to block you while she"s with him if it makes her uncomfortable or if he told her it makes him uncomfortable having you around.Mippo said:
I"d say you burned the bridge when you told her how you felt while she was with him. You should have kept it to yourself until she wasn"t with him.Mippo said:
Again maybe I"m wrong but that"s how I read it. It"s my opinion that you"re the one who"s in the wrong here, and if I was her I"d be pissed as fuck at you too.
Cutlery
Kill All the White People
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What the fuck are you talking about, cocksucker?Divinefactor said:
You were the one that brought up the fact that I"m married. I just said that at 31, I can talk to women FAR better than I could at 17, just due to the fact that I"ve got 14 more years of experience doing it. Where the fuck does me being married come into the equation?
I got the fucking message a long time ago. Even though this entire thread is all about finding "The one," no one actually wants to be married or thinks it"s any good at all. So fine, I don"t talk about it. It"s just asshats like you that bring it up into every fucking conversation every time I say anything. So yeah, you"re a fucking troll.
This whole thread is just like talking to your kids anyway. Even though you have done all the stupid shit that they"re doing, they still don"t want to believe you and have to go make all the same dumbass mistakes themselves just to be sure. Just admit that no one is learning anything from this thread and they"re just going about their lives making the same mistakes over and over again because it"s what they do.
Although you"re probably being a bit hyperbolic, I"ll still say that I"m with you on this. I want to get married, and I look forward to it.
If you don"t learn to ignore the trolls you"re going to spend the rest of this thread"s life defending your decision to get married, and the more vehement your defense the more people will doubt that you are actually comfortable with your decision. I personally have no opinion on the matter, just thought I"d give some friendly advice.TheCutlery said:
This is not true. I"ve learned that I"m not alone when it comes to my insecurities and fears over women, and that it is possible to overcome these things with practice and the right mindset. Knowing that it can be done and that I"m not as bad off as my insecurities would lead me to believe has made a huge difference in my life.TheCutlery said:
Just to reply to this, she has known that I liked her for over a year so it"s not exactly like this is new information and secondly she has been single for the past 6-7 months. How can you fault me for telling her I liked her? If she wanted to cut ties when I told her, she would"ve had a right to do so but a year later that obviously was not the issue. The reason we had a falling out a year ago was because I insulted her boyfriend (called him a douchebag along with everyone else who has met him) and for whatever reason she relayed everything I said to her which I didn"t realize. She told her boyfriend I liked her, then spent hours at my house, and told him I thought he was a douchebag. I think she was just telling him what was going on, but it caused him to hate me and that"s why I think the pressure to get rid of me was because of him. She knew I liked her for several months while dating him prior to it ever blowing up and that was a year ago. A month after they broke up, she friend requested me on FB again (they weren"t talking at that point).Seths said:
We"ve been close friends for months now with him out of the picture and the same WEEK she starts talking to him again I get randomly blocked on facebook. A person who tells me everything, talks to me all the time, always wants to go out and calls me almost every day until she started talking with him again. It"s kind of hard not to think he had something to do with it for me to get added back when she broke up with him and kicked out again right after she starts talking to him. It"s a huge coincidence if he had nothing to do with it.
Regardless, she has known I"ve liked her for over a year so that"s not exactly an excuse for her to kick me to the curb now and that has never been an issue for her. Regardless, she was ignoring me (which she never does to me) and blocked me on Facebook (not removed as friends but blocked) PRIOR to me messaging this guy. We talked about that at length because another guy had done it to her (someone she truly liked) and she used to lose sleep every night whenever he wouldn"t respond to her and she knows it has the same affect on me because we"ve specifically talked about that. Knowing it was going to set me off, and she did, I firmly believe she as at fault for starting this. Yes, I am at fault for overreacting and messaging the guy, but it was her decision to start this shitstorm by blocking me and ignoring me. After all the shit that happened the first time, her insulting me for almost 3 months (which I always felt was due to this guy) once she comes back as friends which she CHOSE to do after they broke up it"s fucking bullshit to do the same thing to me TWICE. I never said anything bad about him and completely left her alone in those regards the second time around. I"ve been nothing but a good friend to her and she blocked me out of the blue when she started talking with this guy again. That"s not right, regardless of whether or not it was due to the guy (she claims it wasn"t) it"s still not right. Even if she wanted to end our friendship there are other ways of doing it without a rude blocking for no reason. We talked all the time, sometimes argued, she easily could"ve brought whatever issue she had up and more importantly, I"m moving soon anyway so why even cause the shitstorm prior to me moving?
It makes me uncomfortable when she comes around and because I firmly believe she started everything (yes messaging him was wrong but I NEVER would"ve done it if she didn"t ignore me, she was sending some texts but not letting me know what was going on, and blocked me on facebook). That is what started all of it this time around and the day before she blocked me we had just talked on the phone for over three hours (nothing bad). I don"t think she intended to lose me as a friend because I think the reason she blocked ALL of my friends is not because she simultaneously hated everyone but because he was pressuring her into getting rid of me so she thought she could act like she deleted her facebook (which she did the day before and told me) to appeal to him (I would be off her friends) while I wouldn"t know she really had me blocked. I think that"s what her intention was, but I knew she blocked me because she has a lot of messages on my page and they disappear if you delete but still show up if you are blocked. Regardless of her intention, she needs to take responsibility for the shitstorm SHE STARTED with the random blocking and because she blocked ALL OF US, I don"t think it is right for her to come hang out with me and that same group of friends she blocked. I think, if she is going to purposefully ignore me, that I"m well within my rights to say she isn"t welcome until she treats me with some respect. Basically, she used to hang out with us a lot and she hasn"t been able to the last 6 weeks and I"m sure she is blaming me for it when it is HER FAULT. I also don"t think it"s ok for me to have to be uncomfortable just to cater to her so she can go to a party. She should"ve thought about the potential downside to what she was doing so it"s bullshit for her to "punish" me by losing me as a friend then hanging out with my friends and treating me like a bitch in the process. You can"t have your cake and eat it too. She chose to kick me out, she should have to live with that choice on her end which is leaving me alone. It"s not my fault she wants to continue hanging out but I shouldn"t have to allow it if she is going to be a bitch.
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The girl will never change, take her for who she is and dont allow her back into your life. Block her, and avoid her. If your friends are trying to convince you to allow her back in then remind them.
She"s a dumb little girl trying to have her cake and eat it too. What else is there to say, anyone that would quickly block you when a guy comes back into her life tells you all you need to know.. that you"re convenient, available, disposable etc to her..
She"s a dumb little girl trying to have her cake and eat it too. What else is there to say, anyone that would quickly block you when a guy comes back into her life tells you all you need to know.. that you"re convenient, available, disposable etc to her..
What I see is a lot of guys believe girls are these beautiful flowers that never pollinate. The thing is they pollinate alright, they just study the situation better and hardly get caught. In my experience all you need to do is not give a shit and just have fun until the one girl comes along that sticks by you through thick and thin. You can fuck up multiple times and she is there no matter what, those are the keepers.
The ones that are throwaways are the ones that fuck up really bad once and promise never to do it again, but they will...it"s only a matter of time. Let"s be honest, if they have a history of doing the same ole shit they aren"t going to change their ways, that shit is internally programmed since age 13. It"s the women that even though you fuck up don"t stray from you and actually fight for you that are worth keeping
If she cheats on you ever, believe she will do it again. If she seriously lies to you...she will do it again.
The point i"m getting at is (this is entirely my own opinion keep that in mind) that is if your SO has one lapse in moral judgement, that you yourself believes breaks trust, it will be an ongoing issue.
TL;DR: Don"t put poon on a pedestal, if she slips...she will slip again guaranteed, poster has been through the shit before.
The ones that are throwaways are the ones that fuck up really bad once and promise never to do it again, but they will...it"s only a matter of time. Let"s be honest, if they have a history of doing the same ole shit they aren"t going to change their ways, that shit is internally programmed since age 13. It"s the women that even though you fuck up don"t stray from you and actually fight for you that are worth keeping
If she cheats on you ever, believe she will do it again. If she seriously lies to you...she will do it again.
The point i"m getting at is (this is entirely my own opinion keep that in mind) that is if your SO has one lapse in moral judgement, that you yourself believes breaks trust, it will be an ongoing issue.
TL;DR: Don"t put poon on a pedestal, if she slips...she will slip again guaranteed, poster has been through the shit before.
Well, at least you"re honest.Divinefactor said:
That"s because she probablyispushing Jenny onto you. It"s still possible to be one of three things:Divinefactor said:
1) Jenny called dibs on you (Yes, women do that, too)
2)[Unlikely Scenario]Nora is "testing" to see if you like Jenny more than her (we"re competitive bitches)
3) Nora only made out with you because she was intoxicated and isn"t actually interested in you / a relationship with you
I doubt it would do you much good to pursue Nora, to be honest. She"s probably following girl code if Jenny called dibs. If it"s the latter of what I mentioned above, there"s some hope I suppose, but you"re probably going to have to up your game.Divinefactor said:
What does Mika look like? Maybe take her for a spin?!Divinefactor said:
The girls mentally unstable and insecure. Firstly she goes back to her bf and tells him this shit to make him jealous obviously. It"s also pretty clear she was stringing you along the hole time. She loved the fact you liked her whilst she had a BF it was like a security blanket. The reason why she brushed you so hard was because she would have been lying to her BF at the time calling you a stalker. She wanted no contact because thats more chance her BF would find out she was talking shit. Now her and the BF aren"t together she blames you for their break up and hates you for it.Mippo said:
This bitch is insecure and crazy as hell. She will end up in a shallow marriage wondering wtf happened and continue to blame all of her problems on other people.
P.S You definitely shouldn"t have messaged the BF thats straight up disrespect. In saying that the problem wasn"t you or the BF, it was her. I"m pretty sure you and the BF would have hated each other and blamed each other when it"s her that you both should have hated.