Girls who broke your heart thread
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Brad2770
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She did- End of the first email from her. Thats pretty much what sparked my real interest. Before that, it was strictly "I wanna learn more about art" and not my way of trying to get a date.taebin said:
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
I had actually missed it the first time I read the email because of how the email appeared on my phone. I didnt notice the P.S. until a day or so later right before I was about to delete the email.
Eomer
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I wouldn"t read in to that much at all. Women always do that. "Oh I can"t hang out any time in the next three months because of X, but maybe next year will work?" That way it"s not a total rejection. Dangling that carrot. From what you"ve given us, I"d say she likely isn"t interested. Most schools have zero actual policies in terms of dating students, she even alluded to that in her response ("somewhat unprofessional" and not "my ass will get shit canned"). If she"d been truly interested, she"d likely have accepted the invitation. Her whole response is her steering you in to being just another student, really, and not a romantic interest.
That said, there"s nothing wrong with asking her out to coffee once you"re done her class, other than making her give you a final direct rejection. Don"t try to disguise it as something related to school or art. If she"s interested, she"ll say yes. Keep the invite short and to the point.
"Hey, now that your professionalism is no longer at stake, would you be interested in grabbing a coffee?"
I dunno, something along those lines. Then again, my advice is highly suspect based upon my past dating experiences. This weekend watch me try to get laid at a lesbian wedding!
edit: and good for you on the engineering thing. I hope you like math.
That said, there"s nothing wrong with asking her out to coffee once you"re done her class, other than making her give you a final direct rejection. Don"t try to disguise it as something related to school or art. If she"s interested, she"ll say yes. Keep the invite short and to the point.
"Hey, now that your professionalism is no longer at stake, would you be interested in grabbing a coffee?"
I dunno, something along those lines. Then again, my advice is highly suspect based upon my past dating experiences. This weekend watch me try to get laid at a lesbian wedding!
edit: and good for you on the engineering thing. I hope you like math.
Void
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I"d wait until after she has posted whatever grade you"re going to be getting in her class. I don"t know if you have a final test or project or whatever, but walking up to her, turning it in, and then basically hitting her with going on a date will still allow her to play the professionalism card. To someone really concerned about their image, you *could* be seen as trying to get a better grade, so wait until after grades are finalized, and then email her, ask her in person, or whatever option is available to you. Even state in your request that you understand how important it is for her to maintain her integrity, and that"s why you waited the extra time. It can"t hurt to be seen as understanding of how important her job is.
That way, if it really is a rejection, at least you"ll know it is because she"s not interested and won"t have to worry about second-guessing her reply.
That way, if it really is a rejection, at least you"ll know it is because she"s not interested and won"t have to worry about second-guessing her reply.
In my experience dating instructors / TAs, they take their job seriously and don"t want to put their job on the line. So my opinion differs from everyone else. I think she is actually interested and does want to go out with you but not until after the semester.
Coupled by the fact that she"s 37, generally women in their 30"s are more straight forward and don"t play games. If she wasn"t interested, she wouldn"t even put the possibility out there.
So yea, ask her out with a short and sweet line, like Eomer"s. I think she"ll say yes.
Coupled by the fact that she"s 37, generally women in their 30"s are more straight forward and don"t play games. If she wasn"t interested, she wouldn"t even put the possibility out there.
So yea, ask her out with a short and sweet line, like Eomer"s. I think she"ll say yes.
A lot of universities here actually do have faculty-student dating policies. If there isn"t an out-and-out "you may not date students you are teaching" statement, it is likely very frowned upon.
Ask her after grades are posted. If she still says no, respect that her job/professionalism could be on the line.
And congratulations on returning to school and doing something good with it.
Ask her after grades are posted. If she still says no, respect that her job/professionalism could be on the line.
And congratulations on returning to school and doing something good with it.
Brad2770
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I am good at it, but I dont like it. maybe that will change when I see my math actually become something. They are adding a new interchange at hwy 161 and I-20 and I pass it everyday on my way to school. Fucking love seeing that shit built.Eomer said:
@ Tuco
I had already planned to use those exact words.
Haast
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Changing the subject a little...
How about stories of regret? Is there a girl you had the opportunity to date/fuck/whatever and you fucked it up royal and years later you still regret it?
I can think of a number of them, so I"ll share a couple from HS to get things started.
One was a girl who was somewhat of a family friend. Our little brothers played on the same soccer team, so we would hang out during the games. She was cute, thin and athletic (she also played soccer). Fast forward a few years, I"m a junior in HS and she is a freshman. There was some mutual attraction, but neither of us had acted on it. Well, one day she gets one of her friends to ask me out for her point blank. I don"t recall what dumb reason I had (considering asking out someone less important, bad mood, something), but I blew it off with a very lame excuse. I think she was in earshot and heard the lame excuse. While we remained friends for years afterwards, she never forgave me romantically. And considering the situation, I don"t blame her. Completely regret it. If nothing else because it was a shitty thing to do to a friend I was actually attracted to. Moreso because she was attractive and smart and I ended up wanting to date her not long after (and for the rest of HS, more or less), but no dice.
The other was a girl who transferred to my HS when I was a senior and she was a junior. We were in some activities together and I liked her the first time I saw her. Very cute, athletic and apparently very smart; I think she ended up graduating in the top five of her class. However, she didn"t stick with the activities and concentrated on track instead, so I didn"t see her much. Later in the year, I randomly went out to watch a track meet at my school. Completely out of the blue, one of my close friends from the private elementary school I went to was rounding the corner finishing his race. I found him afterwards and was talking with him and some his friends. As we were talking, a girl from my school"s team came over and told me her friend said I looked familiar. Without thinking, I made a smart-ass comment along the lines of "I should, I go to school here", but more rude and dismissive. I looked over and the friend that sent the other girl over was none other than the girl I liked. Her friend was thoroughly unimpressed with my bad attitude and basically told me to shove it if I was going to be an asshole about it. I"m not sure I even realized what a dumbass I was at the moment, but I could tell by the look on the guys" faces I was talking to that I fucked that up huge. Regret sank in shortly after. She was cordial the few times I ran into her after, but definitely not about to put herself out there again.
Come to think of it, I did a really shitty job of handling people in HS. Live and learn, I suppose. One lesson learned: once someone puts themselves out there, you take the opportunity or it"s gone. Second chances are unlikely in those situations.
How about stories of regret? Is there a girl you had the opportunity to date/fuck/whatever and you fucked it up royal and years later you still regret it?
I can think of a number of them, so I"ll share a couple from HS to get things started.
One was a girl who was somewhat of a family friend. Our little brothers played on the same soccer team, so we would hang out during the games. She was cute, thin and athletic (she also played soccer). Fast forward a few years, I"m a junior in HS and she is a freshman. There was some mutual attraction, but neither of us had acted on it. Well, one day she gets one of her friends to ask me out for her point blank. I don"t recall what dumb reason I had (considering asking out someone less important, bad mood, something), but I blew it off with a very lame excuse. I think she was in earshot and heard the lame excuse. While we remained friends for years afterwards, she never forgave me romantically. And considering the situation, I don"t blame her. Completely regret it. If nothing else because it was a shitty thing to do to a friend I was actually attracted to. Moreso because she was attractive and smart and I ended up wanting to date her not long after (and for the rest of HS, more or less), but no dice.
The other was a girl who transferred to my HS when I was a senior and she was a junior. We were in some activities together and I liked her the first time I saw her. Very cute, athletic and apparently very smart; I think she ended up graduating in the top five of her class. However, she didn"t stick with the activities and concentrated on track instead, so I didn"t see her much. Later in the year, I randomly went out to watch a track meet at my school. Completely out of the blue, one of my close friends from the private elementary school I went to was rounding the corner finishing his race. I found him afterwards and was talking with him and some his friends. As we were talking, a girl from my school"s team came over and told me her friend said I looked familiar. Without thinking, I made a smart-ass comment along the lines of "I should, I go to school here", but more rude and dismissive. I looked over and the friend that sent the other girl over was none other than the girl I liked. Her friend was thoroughly unimpressed with my bad attitude and basically told me to shove it if I was going to be an asshole about it. I"m not sure I even realized what a dumbass I was at the moment, but I could tell by the look on the guys" faces I was talking to that I fucked that up huge. Regret sank in shortly after. She was cordial the few times I ran into her after, but definitely not about to put herself out there again.
Come to think of it, I did a really shitty job of handling people in HS. Live and learn, I suppose. One lesson learned: once someone puts themselves out there, you take the opportunity or it"s gone. Second chances are unlikely in those situations.
one purely sexual regret.
In college i was pretty much a man whore. while it wouldnt be accurate to say i"d fuck anything with two feet and a heartbeat, my standards werent exactly "knees are too sharp". as long as you were passably cute and not hugely obese/hairy/etc i was all up ons.
I think it was a way to make sure i always felt superior, because i was always alpha male with them, but with the many superhot girls i lived in a dorm with, i was always super polite and the shoulder to cry on. which of course got me no action at all.
so one weekend there are a couple of girls staying over with a friend of theirs, and one of them is smoking hot. in fact that month she was the girl of the month on some beer calendar, wearing nothing but some strategically placed bubble wrap. we all go out drinking, and all night i am Mr Polite, i dont go out and hit on anyone, i just chilled with her and talked. we were obviously hitting it off, and when we all got back to the dorm she asked if she could stay with me instead of in her friends room.
i swear to god, she was so hot that the thought of sleeping with her actually never even crossed my mind if that makes sense. she undressed to this absolutely ridiculous victoria secret bra and panty set and lays down in my bed. i get in, and proceed to not even touch her all night long. there was some spooning as dawn approached but i was just in awe of the perfect ass pressing against my crotch in a little g-string than horny. i was just dumbstruck.
next morning everyone assumes the obvious and she says "no he was a perfect gentleman". all morning i am kicking myself, and just as she is leaving i ask her, had i made a move would you have gone for it. and she says yes. all night she had been waiting for me to make a move.
FML
In college i was pretty much a man whore. while it wouldnt be accurate to say i"d fuck anything with two feet and a heartbeat, my standards werent exactly "knees are too sharp". as long as you were passably cute and not hugely obese/hairy/etc i was all up ons.
I think it was a way to make sure i always felt superior, because i was always alpha male with them, but with the many superhot girls i lived in a dorm with, i was always super polite and the shoulder to cry on. which of course got me no action at all.
so one weekend there are a couple of girls staying over with a friend of theirs, and one of them is smoking hot. in fact that month she was the girl of the month on some beer calendar, wearing nothing but some strategically placed bubble wrap. we all go out drinking, and all night i am Mr Polite, i dont go out and hit on anyone, i just chilled with her and talked. we were obviously hitting it off, and when we all got back to the dorm she asked if she could stay with me instead of in her friends room.
i swear to god, she was so hot that the thought of sleeping with her actually never even crossed my mind if that makes sense. she undressed to this absolutely ridiculous victoria secret bra and panty set and lays down in my bed. i get in, and proceed to not even touch her all night long. there was some spooning as dawn approached but i was just in awe of the perfect ass pressing against my crotch in a little g-string than horny. i was just dumbstruck.
next morning everyone assumes the obvious and she says "no he was a perfect gentleman". all morning i am kicking myself, and just as she is leaving i ask her, had i made a move would you have gone for it. and she says yes. all night she had been waiting for me to make a move.
FML
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Did you followup with her? Ask her if she was available later? Or did you just go back to bed, curl up into the fetal position and sob?Kyp said:
Don"t get me wrong, I"ve made more than my fair share of mistakes, but it doesn"t sound like you were completely out of the running at that point (based on what you"ve said so far).
Well I have two. One was a I had a chance to date two hot girls at once when I found out that the one that had been helping me get the other was actually interested in me. I found this out because she told me.Haast said:
Second was this cute little honor"s society girl I met during my Junior year had actually had a huge crush on me and I never realized because I couldn"t even comprehend that it was possible I could date a girl from a world so different from mine. I look back at that time and now I can see all the signs that I couldn"t see then and I want to kick myself.
That"s about the only way I can find interacting with a girl to be interesting.Sharmai said: