Girls who broke your heart thread

Zehn - Vhex said:

Anybody want to buy the mirror I made for last gf? 90$ +s/h. Will include nude photo"s of the girl I made it for. Bonus, it"s a girl who no longer posts on these forums!

Wife wants it gone and I am no longer sentimental about it.

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How much do you want to just post the photos?

Zehn - Vhex said:

Anybody want to buy the mirror I made for last gf? 90$ +s/h. Will include nude photo"s of the girl I made it for. Bonus, it"s a girl who no longer posts on these forums!

Wife wants it gone and I am no longer sentimental about it.

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Only if you add Black Mage to it.

They originally were going to be a matching set. I had a drawing ready to go for black mage and was working on the whacamacallit, sketch? No, fuck...stencil. That"s it. I might still do it some day for shits and grins and see what I can get on ebay.

This thread has been lacking tits for some time. I"ll post what I"ve got available and the stories that go with them on Wednesday when I have time I suppose.

So anyone here have any experience with their significant"s others parents absolutely hating you?...

I"m 26, the g/f is 22 still living at home finishing up her last year at school. We"ve been dating for a year and a half. She"s unable to live with me b/c her family would excommunicate her, they think she"s still a virgin. Her mom has to be the most self rightous judgemental bitch i"ve ever met. This is the first time i"ve EVER had a g/f"s parents hate me. I"m moderately attractive, extremely polite around parents, out of college and make good money.

Her mom started talking shit about me by the THIRD date when my g/f came over to my house to watch a movie, her mom said I wasn"t a gentlemen b/c I didn"t pick her up and that i"m not worth her time... yes she"s that kind of crazy. She"s super religous and although she doesn"t know that i"m an atheist she knows I don"t go to church (I do contract work on weekends so I work 7 days a week as an excuse), this also causes her to talk shit about me on a daily basis.

I"m very good to my g/f, never verbally or mentally abusive. Her mom knows this, yet she still hates me b/c i"m not the "godly" man she wants for her daughter. She told my g/f tonight that she doesn"t have to worry about us getting married b/c god will find a way to bring my g/f a better man for her.

I just don"t know how to deal with the situation. I love my g/f, but I don"t think I could ever be apart of her family, I don"t think there is a human being on this planet that I despise more than her mom and all of her mom"s side of the family who are stuck in the 50"s. My g/f doesn"t understand the pressure her family situation puts on me, if we get anymore serious than we are now she will basically have to choose me vs her family and that is something I DO NOT WANT.

I guess the more I type the more I realize that I should probably just end it on semi-good terms. I"m not use to breaking up with someone who i"m actually compatible with, my breakups are always in the relationshit phase. I wouldn"t even know how to end it.

Any advice from anyone who has been in this situation?

She started talking shit TO you or ABOUT you. If she is talking shit directly to you and you already ate her shit with a smile I am not sure what you should/could do without turning nasty. You should have confronted that shit the instant she gave you lip (in the respectful but smarmy passive aggressive way).

If she is talking about you and the gf is relaying the messages slap your gf. Since the issue is on her end of the equation, and she has not resolved it herself she should at the very least shut the fuck up about it.

Its not your problem its hers. In the reverse would you tell your GF your mother thinks she is a fat whore? Probably not.

Dryst said:

So anyone here have any experience with their significant"s others parents absolutely hating you?...

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Move on. It"s not worth dealing with. If you like the girl enough to put up with it, that means you have to like her enough to put up with it for the rest of their lives.

Seems like you have the right idea. If your girl just takes that kind of crap from her mom, especially at 22, eventually it will break your relationship. Mother is worthless, as most self-righteous religious assholes are, but if your girlfriend shows no sign of trying to break from that insanity then at some point she will leave you for it, at least in my experience.

Talk to her seriously and let her know that she can woman up and stay with you, letting her mother know its not her fucking business, or she can keep disrespecting you by passing along childish BS messages ( read: passively agreeing with her mother ), in which case tell her its over.

MrGraham said:

Move on. It"s not worth dealing with. If you like the girl enough to put up with it, that means you have to like her enough to put up with itfor the rest of their lives.

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I think he was hinting to your solution, Dryst.

Sounds like you"re not nearly mature enough to handle this situation properly or you would have by now. Basically, who the fuck cares what her family thinks of you? You"re dating her, not her family.

Zehn - Vhex said:

Sounds like you"re not nearly mature enough to handle this situation properly or you would have by now. Basically, who the fuck cares what her family thinks of you? You"re dating her, not her family.

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Who cares what her family think of him? The girl, obviously. At some point if what he says is true it"s going to come down to him vs. family. Chances are he"ll be on the losing side of that battle. He needs to sit down with the GF and discuss it frankly with her. Is she religious too? Is she in it for the long haul or just continuing to date? They"re at a year and a half, it should be apparent to both of them if there"s something more than dating or not. If there is, then it comes down to whether or not she is willing to put him in front of the family or not. If there isn"t, then time to cut the losses and move on.

Zehn - Vhex said:

Sounds like you"re not nearly mature enough to handle this situation properly or you would have by now. Basically, who the fuck cares what her family thinks of you? You"re dating her, not her family.

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Totally this. Keep in mind though you still need to have a discussion with your g/f, and the discussion is totally dependent on how far you want this relationship to go.

Do you want to marry her? If yes, you need to discuss her family. She needs to do one of two things:

1.) Basically tell you she doesnt give a fuck what her mom says about you, and that you are #1 in her life. Period, end of story. If you get married she is YOUR family now, you hers, meaning that everyone else in her life becomes a distant second.

2.) She has a "talk" with her mother, and comes to terms with you in some form or fashion. Basically telling her "if you cant say something nice don"t say anything at all, OR risk my excommunicating myself from you forever" (meaning your g/f not talking to her mom, choosing you over her).

Keep in mind if she does do one of the above two things, or both for that matter. You better be deadly serious about her, because that is asking a lot for someone to do in a relationship. If you fuck up (various ways), not only have you fucked up the relationship with you and her, you also caused her to fuck up her relationship with her family.

In the end Vhex is right, you marry her, not her family, your level of involvement in her family matters is really completely up to you. Kids do add more time spent with your in laws, but believe it or not you wield a lot of power in that dynamic, meaning a lot of ground rules can be placed (like for instance not talking mad shit about you). My suggestion is if she does do the above two things I suggest, make sure you stay above it all. Continue to be polite around her parents, if she is being belligerent around you, simply say "hey I gotta go" or "We gotta go", excuse yourself. Because in the end, fuck them, they have no bearing on your life, obviously are not Christians (Christians are not suppose to judge people, and while even the best of us still do, they are taking it to a new extreme, which is fucking wrong in so many ways to count). Just rise above it, seems you have your head on straight about you and your life, if you care about this women you can make it work. If you feel like it isnt worth it, simply move on.

Shit I even got rejected by a girl in high school because her parents liked me too much. Girls are fucking weird. At 22 she is probably still going through her rebellion phase. She probably loves the fact that her parents don"t like you.

Tenks said:

Shit I even got rejected by a girl in high school because her parents liked me too much.

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She must"ve been psyched when you bought that break up line.

Whaaaat? Of course you marry her family if you marry her. Wtf, hello Mcfly?

Dryst said:

So anyone here have any experience with their significant"s others parents absolutely hating you?...

I"m 26, the g/f is 22 still living at home finishing up her last year at school. We"ve been dating for a year and a half. She"s unable to live with me b/c her family would excommunicate her, they think she"s still a virgin. Her mom has to be the most self rightous judgemental bitch i"ve ever met. This is the first time i"ve EVER had a g/f"s parents hate me. I"m moderately attractive, extremely polite around parents, out of college and make good money.

Her mom started talking shit about me by the THIRD date when my g/f came over to my house to watch a movie, her mom said I wasn"t a gentlemen b/c I didn"t pick her up and that i"m not worth her time... yes she"s that kind of crazy. She"s super religous and although she doesn"t know that i"m an atheist she knows I don"t go to church (I do contract work on weekends so I work 7 days a week as an excuse), this also causes her to talk shit about me on a daily basis.

I"m very good to my g/f, never verbally or mentally abusive. Her mom knows this, yet she still hates me b/c i"m not the "godly" man she wants for her daughter. She told my g/f tonight that she doesn"t have to worry about us getting married b/c god will find a way to bring my g/f a better man for her.

I just don"t know how to deal with the situation. I love my g/f, but I don"t think I could ever be apart of her family, I don"t think there is a human being on this planet that I despise more than her mom and all of her mom"s side of the family who are stuck in the 50"s. My g/f doesn"t understand the pressure her family situation puts on me, if we get anymore serious than we are now she will basically have to choose me vs her family and that is something I DO NOT WANT.

I guess the more I type the more I realize that I should probably just end it on semi-good terms. I"m not use to breaking up with someone who i"m actually compatible with, my breakups are always in the relationshit phase. I wouldn"t even know how to end it.

Any advice from anyone who has been in this situation?

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Pretty obvious what needs to be done here.

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The Ancient said:

She must"ve been psyched when you bought that break up line.

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It was a bit more complicated than just that. She was one of those girls who thought she was right 100000% of the time. Anytime her mom would ask her to do something minor or trivial it was always "omg my mom is such an overbearing bitch." To which I"d respond "Um, she just asked you to take out the trash." She"d then go off on me about how I"d always take her mom"s side -- I told her because her mom is usually right and she"s wrong. Needless to say she didn"t care for that one bit. She was a complete spoiled brat and her parents gave her everything and paid for everything but she was convinced they were the worst parents in the world (new car at 16, college completely paid for, lived in a million dollar home, paid ~$400/mo for new clothes...) Looking back I hate the bitch.

Kilivek said:

Whaaaat? Of course you marry her family if you marry her. Wtf, hello Mcfly?

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I don"t think you marry her family but it"s asking quite a lot of a 22 year old girl to tell her family to fuck off.

Dis said:

My suggestion is if she does do the above two things I suggest, make sure you stay above it all. Continue to be polite around her parents, if she is being belligerent around you, simply say "hey I gotta go" or "We gotta go", excuse yourself. Because in the end, fuck them, they have no bearing on your life, obviously are not Christians (Christians are not suppose to judge people, and while even the best of us still do, they are taking it to a new extreme, which is fucking wrong in so many ways to count). Just rise above it, seems you have your head on straight about you and your life, if you care about this women you can make it work. If you feel like it isnt worth it, simply move on.

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For what its worth from a lurker:

I think this overall sentiment is pretty important. Absolutely set some ground rules now as to what type of behavior is unacceptable, but if you continue on in the relationship, its inevitable that you"ll run into some bad spots from time to time. Its important that you not get caught up in and "eye for an eye" mentality (to continue with the religious theme). There"s just nothing to be gained from it.

I had issues with my in-laws when my wife and I first got married, although it sounds like not nearly as severe as what you"re describing. And, while all that has mostly gone away, I still have issues with my father in-law getting a bug up his ass about one thing or another here and there or my mother in-law"s passive aggressiveness. Early on in the relationship, I pushed back a lot harder on that type of stuff - it bugged me to no end. Once I let that slide a bit, they got a lot more manageable. I"m not saying to not stick up for yourself, but there"s a line where sticking up for yourself becomes sticking it to your potential in-laws. And, while they sound like they might have that coming, its pretty demeaning to you to engage in that kind of thing with them.

Lol thanks for the advice guys, I probably should have clarified my original post more. My g/f always defends me to her mom, we"ve had the discussion about what to do about her family and my g/f has said that i"m more important and what her mom thinks about me does not reflect her feelings for me in the least, all it does isput distance between her and her mom. Her mom never says this stuff to my face, she"s always "fake" nice to me in person.

Her family is a very traditional italian family that"s way more family centric than i"m use to. Her relationship with her family is important but she"s said time and time again that if it comes down to it our happiness is more important than her relationship with them.

This scares the shit out of me though, if I broke up her relationship with her family I would feel responsible for staying with her even if we weren"t happy down the road. This added pressure just makes me second guess everything in our relationship.

For those guys saying "Hey faggot why do you care what they think, are you fucking the mom", let me clarify... i"m not Aamina. But when your in the situation of "If I marry you my family will not come to the wedding and will stop talking to me" it changes your view on things and OBVIOUSLY becomes an important factor in the relationship.

Only two positive outcomes that I can see is to move to a different city where her family becomes a very small part of her life.... or the Casey Anthony option...