Girls who broke your heart thread

Maybe I misread it but I took it to mean she was trolling this Bob guy and trying to break his heart or something in revenge for something he did to her in the past... at least that was my take on it. *shrugs* But my advice still stands. If you are happy leave it alone.

Daelos said:

My turn to join this thread

12 years, married, 2 kids. "Perfect couple"-appearance to family, friends and... me. But apparently not to her.

That"s enough for now. This hurts.

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This has been a weird 10 days. Being dumped hard, grieving over that, finding out she"s been seeing someone, handling that shock, then some idiot went crazy with a bomb + guns to commit the worst atrocity in Europe since WW2. That should have put into perspective for me, but just made me feel even worse for feeling sorry for my pitiful self when people had been killed.

Anyway.

Status update:
- I"ve got a place to stay, moving in on Saturday
- Completed drafting
- Agreements about the kids, who gets to see them when, and child support
- Agreement about splitting up our financials
- Arranged to see a divorce lawyer
- Arranged the mandatory session with the family office (when kids < 16 y.o. are involved, in Norway, you need to have a third party check that what you are doing wrt the kids is ok)
- Been working out every day
- I can finally sleep more than 4 hours a night
- Still difficulties eating (lost ~4 kgs), but that"s improving

Now, that was the first 10 days. I"m running out of things to do.

In the words of Cherry Poppin" Daddies, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. Also I just watched the movie Super yesterday and the cop said pretty much the same thing, so it"s two against one now.

Camerous Valde Unus said:

Maybe I misread it but I took it to mean she was trolling this Bob guy and trying to break his heart or something in revenge for something he did to her in the past... at least that was my take on it. *shrugs* But my advice still stands. If you are happy leave it alone.

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The way I read it was this...

Bob spurns Psycho, moves to Canada.

Psycho gets with Avgeek, they live together.

Psycho creates multiple social-network personalities. One of the personalities is a semi-love interest for Bob. This new love interest is being used to build Psycho up and make Bob regret leaving her.

Not sure...She is definitely a psychopath though. Most people would only create one false persona..But to create six shows a methodicalness that is really out there.

Jabberwhacky said:

In the words of Cherry Poppin" Daddies

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Hahaha, what a tool.

Daelos said:

This has been a weird 10 days. Being dumped hard, grieving over that, finding out she"s been seeing someone, handling that shock, then some idiot went crazy with a bomb + guns to commit the worst atrocity in Europe since WW2. That should have put into perspective for me, but just made me feel even worse for feeling sorry for my pitiful self when people had been killed.

Anyway.

Status update:
- I"ve got a place to stay, moving in on Saturday
- Completed drafting
- Agreements about the kids, who gets to see them when, and child support
- Agreement about splitting up our financials
- Arranged to see a divorce lawyer
- Arranged the mandatory session with the family office (when kids < 16 y.o. are involved, in Norway, you need to have a third party check that what you are doing wrt the kids is ok)
- Been working out every day
- I can finally sleep more than 4 hours a night
- Still difficulties eating (lost ~4 kgs), but that"s improving

Now, that was the first 10 days. I"m running out of things to do.

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Just a word of advice - I would not move out. Once you are out you won?t get back in, or it will be next to impossible. Also, If you move out, it will immediately reduce your chances of successful custody (if that is your plans) in providing adequate, consistent and a stable home ?. and increase hers. You may lose a lot of contact and active participation with your children, worsening your position. It will provide your spouse with even more security (& even less for your cause) and advantage her winning custody.

If you move out, you will have to find a new place that very likely will be substandard in comparison with having to re-buy absolutely everything imaginable - with money you don?t have. And if you do have it, you?ll definitely need it for all the legal fees. On top of this, your children will have to adjust to your new home which will not have all their things they are already use to and comfortable with. They will immediately feel less likely to want to keep coming over to your new place to spend time. It will make them feel less at ease, uncomfortable, and misplaced or ?not at home".

It may seem like the chivalrous thing to do, but understand that she started this. Divorce court is hell man, at least in America.

PigBenis said:

at least in America.

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Thankfully, hes not in the US. I"m curious as to how an European country handles this.

In Norway.

Wrt kids and custody: As long as I can work out an agreement with my ex (and we can), we can decide whatever we want to. The agreement that is due to be signed is basically 50/50 custody, and a long string of exceptions and how to handle vacations, holidays etc.

Wrt our house, cars etc, we own everything 50/50, and it"s just a matter of working out the details. I don"t want to live here, and if I can live substandard for a while and save up some cash (high income, low savings), that"s fine with me. (Right now I get to housesit for a friend who is overseas for a year, so I don"t have to spend anything on a house/flat)

You do have a good point about the kids being uncomfortable in another home. The arrangement will most likely be that I will have them at my place in the weekends, and some weekdays I will pick them up at school/childcare and be with them in our current house until my ex gets back from work.

(Yeah, we"re managing to keep cool heads through this, turning over every stone to make sure the impact on the kids is absolutely minimal. We"ve even got it written down that for the kids" birthdays, we will both be there at the party, and stuff like that)

She"s a bitch, but she"s their mother, and a person I loved for many years, and that I can still appreciate as an intelligent and kind woman.

Daelos said:

She"s a bitch

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That is enough right there for me to tell you to be careful. I believed all of the promises that my ex told me when we divorced because I didn"t want any problems for my son and for myself. She has broken pretty much all of those promises except one.

I hope the best for you. Just make sure you get EVERYTHING in writing.

I thought it meant "With Regards To" but I could be completely off base.

I have a Bachelor"s of Science and I"ve never heard of WRT until this day

Yeah, that"s bullshit. I have more science background than most phds and I"ve never heard it in a non legal context.

It"s about what I would expect a paralegal would drop into a document and think he"s hot shit. Lawyers always write it out.

Ser Kegkilla said:

how bout this one: STFU about the fucking abbreviations.

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STFUATFA?