Since Brad has come back with some advice, I feel this is a good time to throw in a little bit of my own too. This will be nothing new for the majority of you, but for those of us (I"m just as guilty) that sometimes have a hard time doing what needs to be done, it doesn"t hurt to be reminded over and over until it finally sinks in.
I documented a very tiny portion of my latest romantic endeavor in Big Picasso"s thread (the best thread ever, and if you aren"t reading it you"re a bad person!), but I"ll jump to the pertinent info instead of boring you with details.
For a couple of months I pretty much lived and breathed for any word from this particular woman, telling myself that her attention was an indication that she was as interested in me as I was in her. I like to think there was at least some initial attraction on her part, but I either ruined it or it was never there and I just invented it. Either way, I literally spent months doing nothing but trying to make her happy in any way I could, despite getting nothing but standard friend stuff in return. Finally I must have gone overboard with sharing my feelings, or she met someone new, or any number of unknown reasons that don"t matter, and she stopped talking to me unless I directly contacted her. Eventually I got the hint. And it doesn"t even matter if she lead me on, or is to blame for anything, because I could have stopped my behavior at any time.
It bummed me out pretty badly, but I thought of this thread and decided I"d only give myself one night of whining like a little bitch (see Big Picasso"s thread for documentation). The saying about the best way to get over someone is by getting under someone else is so true. If I had let myself I probably could have pissed and moaned about how unfair it was for weeks. Instead, I got out there and not only got boob pics from a girl on my birthday Wednesday, but slept with her last night, and will probably be spending the vacation days I had originally planned to spend with the first girl banging the brains out of this new girl. I"m pretty sure I won"t be marrying her or anything, but who cares?
On top of that, I was at the grocery store the other day in the produce aisle when I saw a decent looking woman holding two cantaloupes. I looked at them, looked at her, looked back at them, then back at her. I saw she was smiling, so I said, "You know I want to use the melon line right now, right?" She laughed and we talked, and assuming she didn"t give me a fake number, I"ll call her and see if she wants to go for coffee some time.
Point being, I spent months worrying about one girl, whether she liked me, whether a text message meant one thing or another, etc. Once I stopped, I realized you shouldn"t have to go through so much to figure out if a girl likes you or not. If it isn"t clear, or you"re investing far more than it seems she is, then move the fuck on. I might have missed several better prospects by being a little bitch these past months worrying if she liked me.
Like I said, none of this is new to this thread, or many of the people giving all the good advice. But for those of us that fuck up once in awhile, it doesn"t hurt to hear it every so often. If I could invent some sort of shock collar for men, I"d be rich. Every time a guy starts worrying whether or not a girl likes him, it would shock him and make him realize it isn"t worth it, and he should just get out there and find another one that does. For every girl that makes you wonder if she"s into you, there are dozens more that would be if you just went out and met them. And when in doubt, think What Would Kegkilla Do. That"s what finally pushed me to man up and stop being a pussy.
