Girls who broke your heart thread
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exactly what I was thinkingplease Shutup said:
P.S. Don"t make stupid jokes about her reading your mind or knowing what you"re thinking because she"s a psych student. She heard that 53533 times before her freshman year was over and she hates everyone who says that.
And by she I mean me.
Eomer
Trakanon Raider
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haha, nah, texted once or twice the day after, it"s legit. Plus when she"d taken a call earlier in the morning laying in bed she"d given her number to whoever she was talking with. To reiterate I wasn"t a total moron a couple hours later when I asked for her number I first said what I remembered it to be, and I was off by one digit.Big Picasso said:
I dunno, that could well be. I can be a charming little fucker when I"m on the sauce though. My horrible rendition of Afternoon Delight on karaoke probably didn"t hurt.please Shutup said:
I"m more concerned about the rebound side of things. I don"t know much for details of the previous relationship, other than it"s fairly fresh (within that last month), they"d dated for a significant period of time, and she may have been the one to end it.Haast said:
Nah, I think The Ancient was more referring to me purchasing a fine silk kimono for her. Which is absurd.Daelos said:
I"ll get her a puppy instead.
Evernothing
Bronze Baronet of the Realm
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She wouldn"t let you "put it in" because she is a tranny, judging from the way this and other threads have been going.
Just do what Antarius would do.
Just do what Antarius would do.
Sorry for the equally long post, but I trust this one is as worth it for everyone.earthfell said:
Earthfell explained very well - thanks and it was insightful. But no, I haven"t yet read Bakhtin. I"ll add only a few things.
If you haven"t read the literature directly, this topic is very difficult to grasp because you literally have to circumvent your own thinking and habits of thought. Only when you realize that thewayyou think is influenced and patterned by your culture and not "your own mind", then you can start to ascend beyond it, not in a superior sense, but an objectivist one. That"s why most modern psychology doesn"t help an individualbecome an individual, only to adjust himself or herself as closely and smoothly as possible to the society in which they live, to essentially become a yes-man for societal norms, towantto behave how onemustbehave in order to do what society demands. That"s the goal of modern psychology, and it"s not a mentally healthy one.
This is easily illustrated and proven by numerous examples.
Let"s say we were all Klingon. I am a fierce warrior, who"s killed hundreds in combat. Dabamf is passive, docile, perhaps loves agriculture; he loves to grow things, not kill them. Now, in our Klingon culture, what kind of statements would our family, friends, our society, say about Dabamf? He obviously isn"t "normal" like a warrior. Is he sick? Does he have some kind of neurosis? What would the goal of a Klingon psychologist be in this instance? To adjust him as smoothly as possible to warrior life? Is that mentally healthyfor the individual? Their culture demands an extremely aggressive barbarism and shuns activity like farming, even if farming is more productive.
Now let"s visit another culture called America. There, they have something called money or capital, and exchange of capital is an essential part of daily life. They use it for everything: securing property and calling it theirs, sending their kids to good schools, going to a football game, every event or experience in this culture called America has underlying it this exchange of something that is abstract, doesn"t exist outside of the minds of the people that exchange it. As such, competition is an intrinsic part of this ritual of exchange, as people compete to maximize the gain of this abstract thing or to spend the least amount of it.
What"s developed as a result of our culture is a habit of thought where youthink of everything in terms of its exchange value, and this permeates every aspect of life, from language to even our discussion here, love and relationships. When you make statements such as, "I have a girlfriend," the verbage is such that it implies ownership. Look at that very article. "Don"t invest too much time or effort". The very wordinvestimplies some form of capital and is being used regarding a relationship to another human being. Does that make any sense whatsoever?
What does "I have a cold" mean? You own a virus? What about a million-dollar painting? What kind of painting is it? A billionaire passes away? Who?
This is thepathology of normalcyof American culture, thinking of things, of people, of relationships, in terms of exchange value, in terms of commodities like earthfell said, not as concrete objects or actual human beings, but what can I get, how much profit can I acquire from this exchange. This thinking extends everywhere, to everything, every experience, and the relationships with every person.
And here"s the point:
It"s not objectively mentally healthy.
So you should not read self-help books and not listen to psychologists who prescribe to you a notion ofadjustment. Do not let others, especially women, affect your actions and thoughts. Do what you wanna do, always. And if the outcome isn"t what you want, you"ll know it wasn"t as important as acting asyouwanted to act.
If you"re interested in knowing more (as you should be; it"s your life and your mind here), you can read many of the literature earthfell mentioned, but I would start with H.G. Wells:
The Country of the Blind - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Well, I"m trying to help you not be affected by womenz drama. My therapy isn"t working?Haast said:
Jesus, fuck. Is English not your first language? Can you not see how the the verb "to have" can imply something other than discreet possession?Kilivek said:
It"s interesting how words like having become associated with things like getting sick and being in a relationship. It"s an area of research I"d like to get into.The Ancient said:
Speaking of, I have to go to work! Do you have a problem with that?
The word love is the same way. That word is used so many different places that it"s amazing people still attach any significance to it.
Dropping different things in the deep fryer to see what happens isn"t research.Kilivek said:
Just saw this, but please refer to my previous novel-ish post for a more thorough response.Dabamf said:
I understand them very well, thank you. And you"re missing the entire point -what if the community itself is sick?
Pathological. My brain goes faster than my fingers on occasion. Feel free, because so far you"ve shown to be, frankly, an absolutely and completely uninformed psychologist.
Yes, it"s called adjustment. And causes of social anxiety go very much far, far beyond any simple ineptitude interacting.
No and Yes. I interact just fine, but I"m very happy knowing that I am "being my own person". And it has nothing to do with egoism; it has everything to do withbeingas you yourself stated, fulfilling any human potentiality I"m capable of, being fully human, and experiencing life as such, not through a pattern imparted onto me by culture and its institutions.
Edit: typos.
I really don"t know why you think this. I"m only trying to offer as wide and as truthful a perspective as possible, nothing to do with jacking anything.Eomer said:
These are the kinda things you should be thinking about when it comes to your relationships, not how to manipulate them.
McCheese
SW: Sean, CW: Crone, GW: Wizardhawk
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I"m sure most of us know people like Kilivek in real life who like to question culture and social norms and spout off lots of psychobabble and just generally think they"re smarter than everyone else. Honestly, maybe they are actually smarter than everyone else, and maybe they actually do know what the fuck they"re talking about.
The bottom line, though, is that nobody gives a shit if they are raising valid points or not because they are the most miserable, annoying and depressing people to be around. Funnily enough, these people are always the ones who are eternally single.
The bottom line, though, is that nobody gives a shit if they are raising valid points or not because they are the most miserable, annoying and depressing people to be around. Funnily enough, these people are always the ones who are eternally single.
Want to know why it"s depressing? Because people are so alienated from their own lives, from your own humanity, that even getting a glimpse of it greatly upsets people.
It"s like the fascination people have driving by a terrible car accident; it puts people a little closer to life and death, so people stop and stare. All of the things we feel on a daily basis are mostly fabricated and provided for by society. That romance book made you cry, or that football game made you super excited. Even religion provides for the same feelings, especially the fabricated sense of security. But you"re not the one doing anything - you"re experiencing feeling by proxy. That"s the best this society can do for us.
So when you put someone in touch with something like this, it"s usually depressive and very unsettling. But, after the realization, the real human individual can grow outta it.
It"s like the fascination people have driving by a terrible car accident; it puts people a little closer to life and death, so people stop and stare. All of the things we feel on a daily basis are mostly fabricated and provided for by society. That romance book made you cry, or that football game made you super excited. Even religion provides for the same feelings, especially the fabricated sense of security. But you"re not the one doing anything - you"re experiencing feeling by proxy. That"s the best this society can do for us.
So when you put someone in touch with something like this, it"s usually depressive and very unsettling. But, after the realization, the real human individual can grow outta it.
Yeah, who"s the brainwashed robot? The person who interacts fine in society as an extension of them simply living and not being a dumb fuck?Kilivek said:
Or the person who manages to exist, but only after struggling with all the dark "reality" nobody else seems able to see or understand, who then goes along living in a society they aren"t a part of, a society they at the same time embrace and condemn. Sounds to me like it"s taken a lot of effort and brainwashing just to manage.
Hint: it shouldn"t take so much effort to be yourself. It shouldn"t take defining others to find a definition for yourself. It shouldn"t take condemning society as a whole for you to find your place in it.
You being yourself isn"t any better than the people you condescend to by judging them ignorant and some-how lesser. What if one"s true self is reading an article and faking it until they make it in society. Let me guess, they"re still wrong and bad and worthy of your judgements... because your version of being yourself knows more about them than they do, right, because their version of being themselves is subpar to you being yourself.
If you think about it, simply by being, we"re all being ourselves. The difference is some people being themselves may be "manipulating" or "playing the game," but at least they may not be annoying twats who constantly question whether other people"s "self" is worthy, or even real.