Health Problems

Woefully Inept · Sep 12, 2017

Went in today and had the drain removed. It probably could have been removed a couple days after it was placed because it stopped draining almost immediately. Should have just done this the first time around instead of 3 weeks of needle draining. That damn thing was awful by the end of the day. Good riddance.
Bonus the cute nurse removed the drain instead of my doctor. She had to have known she was doing it because she was blatantly flashing her boobs at me. She was petite but very loose fitting scrubs and hanging boobies 6 inches from your face are hard to avoid. Awwwwkkwwarrrd.

a_skeleton_03 · Sep 12, 2017

Woefully Inept said:
Went in today and had the drain removed. It probably could have been removed a couple days after it was placed because it stopped draining almost immediately. Should have just done this the first time around instead of 3 weeks of needle draining. That damn thing was awful by the end of the day. Good riddance.
Bonus the cute nurse removed the drain instead of my doctor. She had to have known she was doing it because she was blatantly flashing her boobs at me. She was petite but very loose fitting scrubs and hanging boobies 6 inches from your face are hard to avoid. Awwwwkkwwarrrd.

I love those nurses, I have had so many of them. I think they just take pity on us and want us to smile just a little.

Zaphid · Sep 15, 2017

Damn, I missed Lumi in this thread ?

Scrubs are awesome. No idea why so many places insist on formal dress code, It's the one thing that makes working at hospital bearable.

Lanx · Sep 17, 2017

Dealing with the end stages of stage 4 lung cancer for Dad, it invaded his bones and both his ankles are swelling up, so I know that's not going to be good. We moved him to the first floor, with bed and all, is carry him and we his ass if he let me, I don't give a short, but he's still proud and will only let my mom see, which I understand. But I see him wither day by day

Mrs. Gravy · Sep 17, 2017

Lanx said:
Dealing with the end stages of stage 4 lung cancer for Dad, it invaded his bones and both his ankles are swelling up, so I know that's not going to be good. We moved him to the first floor, with bed and all, is carry him and we his ass if he let me, I don't give a short, but he's still proud and will only let my mom see, which I understand. But I see him wither day by day

So sorry, Lanx. Is he allowing hospice to be provided?
Both G and his mom (she died from metastatic colon cancer) benefited from a great hospice agent. I still did most of the personal care but G and his mom did allow the hospice nurses and aides to do showers. That helped me and G and his mom.

Lanx · Sep 18, 2017

Mrs. Gravy said:
So sorry, Lanx. Is he allowing hospice to be provided?
Both G and his mom (she died from metastatic colon cancer) benefited from a great hospice agent. I still did most of the personal care but G and his mom did allow the hospice nurses and aides to do showers. That helped me and G and his mom.

No to hospice, he's moving along real fast, my sister's hope he has a few more weeks, I'm not thinking he has a week. We're lucky enough to have a first floor bath, and for the most part he showers himself, he just let's me pat him dry and dress him.

And yes I know the situation was different, we all know Gravey loved that gravey, so the shower situation is a bit different than if I have to carry around an 80lb wither in asian man.

Im lucky enough too, that two benedryl knocks me out in an hour or I won't be sleeping. But I know it's syupid to worry, and dumber to have a guy who hasn't slept a wink around. One thing I read is too already take care of yourself first, cuz your useless otherwise.

Dandain · Sep 18, 2017

Hospice is a big deal. Don't let culture notions of stoicism keep your Dad and family members from honest support at this time. (if that's an issue I don't mean to assume) The hard work facing now is worth it in the ways that will keep revealing themselves as time works forward. Its one of those things that is worth rethinking relative to cultural norms at least. Truly some dark humored laughs, and some honest moments of vulnerability can really really do amazing things. For the dying and the living. We all die, life should be a crescendo and not a whimper.

I just want to wish you and your family well in your time of navigating this time.

Figure I'd just spoiler this talk, I think its worth anyone's time. He works in hospice - just for the purpose of linking it here.

Lanx · Sep 18, 2017

Dandain said:
Hospice is a big deal. Don't let culture notions of stoicism keep your Dad and family members from honest support at this time. (if that's an issue I don't mean to assume) The hard work facing now is worth it in the ways that will keep revealing themselves as time works forward. Its one of those things that is worth rethinking relative to cultural norms at least. Truly some dark humored laughs, and some honest moments of vulnerability can really really do amazing things. For the dying and the living. We all die, life should be a crescendo and not a whimper.

I just want to wish you and your family well in your time of navigating this time.

Figure I'd just spoiler this talk, I think its worth anyone's time. He works in hospice - just for the purpose of linking it here.

Yea, he'd just rather be in his own home. I don't think he has even accepted it, I don't think anyone has but me, I just see the drastic changes so fast, day be day, I'm keeping a journal entry of it.

I even bought him a tio, bell, lol.

Dandain · Sep 18, 2017

I think that's pretty normal (the not accepting/denial perspective), I think this is why honest talking and being at this time can be so powerful and meaningful. Its hard to even type about this stuff with an accuracy that doesn't sound like partial snobbery. But saying thank you, I love you, I'll be brave with you etc. Sharing and telling stories, whatever is possible. For people less talkative than myself this could clearly manifest in gestures, but there is something powerful about facing down the truth bare and honest. Remember a life lived and not a life lost, I'm sure your father has stories of his youth he has never told you. Some of them could be legendary and worth trying to see if he wants to tell.

Denamian · Sep 18, 2017

Lanx said:
Yea, he'd just rather be in his own home. I don't think he has even accepted it, I don't think anyone has but me, I just see the drastic changes so fast, day be day, I'm keeping a journal entry of it.

I even bought him a tio, bell, lol.

Hospice doesn't mean he has to leave the home. I deal with hospice (mostly the triage nurses) every day at work and they do home care in all the counties we deal with. They don't provide 24/7 aides, but they provide expertise, care planning, getting equipment, meds and that sort of thing.

Even if you expect things to move quickly, it still might be worth looking in to in order to make things as comfortable for him as possible.

Noodleface · Sep 18, 2017

I found out that my dad stopped going to the doctor's because they wanted him on insulin. He said they're full of shit and trying to "scam him". I think it's full blown denial. He's had T2 diabetes for like 20 years, he knows how it works.

I don't know what his blood glucose is at but it can't be good. Also his only medication now is metformin that he buys in Canada. Before you say anything, he's the most stubborn man that has ever existed. Nothing I say will change his behavior.

The bigger issue as I see it is he keeps telling me his legs are numb. He blames it on work, but to me that sounds like class nerve damage. I assume within 5-10 years hell lose his legs or die

Mrs. Gravy · Sep 18, 2017

We had hospice here in our home for both G's mom (first) and G. She went to the hospital hospice bed too, but she had to because the hospice doc deferred to her primary doc at the end and it was fucking horrible.

G...well G was damn sure not going to the hospital, not after that fiasco. Pain and breath management were his biggest things, I mean besides trying to keep his heart pumping the best we could without him going into full on panic. Hospice meds for the pain/breathing and anxiety helped him through some very shitty days. He did allow the assistant and the nurse to help him shower when I wasn't doing it, and he got the massage therapy that was beneficial (that therapist was sweet, cute and had nice tits, so that was a bonus for him ) . Our nurses and our social worker were incredible. I actually missed seeing them. They were in my home so much for two months...

Still wish he could have had that last pizza. OK...I am sobbing now....I am in the room...in his chair...keying this. That fucker. god I miss him.

Oldbased · Sep 21, 2017

What happens if you get tired of the bullshit routine and game doctors and services do and you basically go full on Hitler, finger in the air screaming NEIN and 2 hour rants? Do they come haul you off, or just do as you ask and leave you alone finally?

Aychamo BanBan · Sep 21, 2017

Olebass said:
What happens if you get tired of the bullshit routine and game doctors and services do and you basically go full on Hitler, finger in the air screaming NEIN and 2 hour rants? Do they come haul you off, or just do as you ask and leave you alone finally?

If your family loves you, they'd increase the rate of your morphine drip and give a big dose of IV benzo.

Lanx · Sep 22, 2017

Mrs. Gravy said:
Still wish he could have had that last pizza. OK...I am sobbing now....I am in the room...in his chair...keying this. That fucker. god I miss him.

Heres to you

Woefully Inept · Sep 22, 2017

I just got some Little Caesars for the first time in over a decade. Next left over slice I eat is for Gravy.

Lanx · Sep 23, 2017

My dad made up his mind yesterday to admit himself to the hospice. His right leg is basically gone, in one week he went from walking up the stairs to nearly 24/7 on the make shift 1st floor bed we made him. He wants one last meal with his kids, and we'll take him to the hospital... Which will transfer him to the hospice later???

Also Mom told me not to sign anything, I know my dad's had a dnr so I don't know what else really. What's a living will really?

Kithani · Sep 23, 2017

Is hospice not an in-home thing? I'm very confused by your post unless you're talking about going to inpatient hospice for some reason.

Edit: Apparently you can also go on Hospice at a nursing home... I'm with you I've no idea why you'd have to go to a hospital for that.

Lanx · Sep 24, 2017

Seems that the hospital processes it this way, from ambulance to er to patient room then to hospice across the street. It's nyu lodren and it's all Chinese nurses to keep my dad at ease, so I really can't complain. Chaira could be better, spending the night, but I have an outlet and wifi, I again won't complain.

Lanx · Sep 24, 2017

Mrs. Gravy said:
Still wish he could have had that last pizza. OK...I am sobbing now....I am in the room...in his chair...keying this. That fucker. god I miss him.

I have a 6hr layover in Chicago and as a ny'r sacriligious, but I'll get a deep dish, to Gravy!

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