Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Noodleface

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Uh wow...

Unless you're a devout religious person I guarantee her wanting to be a Virgin will cause serious problems.

Blow jobs only go so far.

Woke up today to my wife bitching at me because some cleaning product I used has been slowing poisoning our son since birth and we're shitty parents. Kid went down for a nap and so did I. Can't deal with this crazy pregnancy shit.
 
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ZyyzYzzy

RIP USA
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Uh wow...

Unless you're a devout religious person I guarantee her wanting to be a Virgin will cause serious problems.

Blow jobs only go so far.

Woke up today to my wife bitching at me because some cleaning product I used has been slowing poisoning our son since birth and we're shitty parents. Kid went down for a nap and so did I. Can't deal with this crazy pregnancy shit.
My wife insists on using only natural cleaning products. Most work for shit. When she works its Zyyz's cleaning happy time with my hidden stash of things that get the job done.
 
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a_skeleton_02

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She was the one who said not now when I asked, obviously I respected that. But I can assure you that things are speeding fast away from the friend zone in no uncertain terms.

This morning however I got a very good explanation as to why... she is still a virgin. I was pretty surprised by that, but handled perfectly, especially compared to the last guy she told a couple of months ago. She just turned 30 btw.

Anyway, I am leaving for a party right now and then going to her place again after. I'll talk more about what happened when I get a chance.

So you identified your last relationship had a major issue because of problems in the bedroom what makes you think some girl who is a virgin at 30 will be better?

A 30 year old virgin...

What?

 

Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
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My wife insists on using only natural cleaning products. Most work for shit. When she works its Zyyz's cleaning happy time with my hidden stash of things that get the job done.
Oh yeah dude I know that.

She insists on cleaning every toy he gets, even one's boxed up, before he uses them.

Yep honey totally washed that.... Yep
 

TrollfaceDeux

Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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She was the one who said not now when I asked, obviously I respected that. But I can assure you that things are speeding fast away from the friend zone in no uncertain terms.

This morning however I got a very good explanation as to why... she is still a virgin. I was pretty surprised by that, but handled perfectly, especially compared to the last guy she told a couple of months ago. She just turned 30 btw.

Anyway, I am leaving for a party right now and then going to her place again after. I'll talk more about what happened when I get a chance.
That is bullshit she is feeding you so that she can have more space (and power) from you. The moment she tells you that shit you should've told her I don't believe you and kick her out. That is fucking insane.
 

Kirun

Buzzfeed Editor
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Kirun is our resident red piller i think but I can't remember.

Nope. Just not a fucking wimp who doesn't know how to close a deal after a chick has been over to my house, ALONE, 3 fucking times.

There's no way a girl is a virgin at 30, especially one that is supposedly as attractive as you describe. She's feeding you a line of bullshit. Either because she's fucking insane or because she needs a rationalization on why you haven't fucked yet(hint: because you're too fucking slow with your intent and/or ineffective at leading).
 

Haast

Lord Nagafen Raider
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Nope. Just not a fucking wimp who doesn't know how to close a deal after a chick has been over to my house, ALONE, 3 fucking times.

There's no way a girl is a virgin at 30, especially one that is supposedly as attractive as you describe. She's feeding you a line of bullshit. Either because she's fucking insane or because she needs a rationalization on why you haven't fucked yet(hint: because you're too fucking slow with your intent and/or ineffective at leading).

kirun.jpg
 
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Mrs. Gravy

Quite Saucy
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He just seems slightly crabby and a bit nasty; maybe he is just hungry or needs a nap or his undies changed.



*note - I waffled over posting this or not, the sassy in me won*
 
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iannis

Musty Nester
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Wait, now we're onto golf metaphors?

Ok. Hole in one is obvious. What's sandtrap? Water hazard? Mulligan?

These metaphors are for like German sex.
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
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You always show up to the course prepared!
 
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Denaut

Trump's Staff
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Your skepticism is my fault, I shouldn't have posted anything without having time to go into detail, and this is pretty damn incredible. If I was a different poster you'd probably think I was the one bullshitting, but I am telling the truth and so is she.

First thing to keep in mind is that this isn't some girl I swiped right on, we were set up by a mutual friend that has known her since they were young teenagers and whose judgement I trust. She wasn't even aware she was being set up until I told her on our second date, she thought I was friends with another person that was there and us meeting was a coincidence.

After she reluctantly told me (it took her a while to get the words out) we discussed her unique situation in some detail. Neither she, nor her family is religious in any way, which isn't uncommon here. Apparently sex and relationships simply weren't something she was interested until a couple of years ago, and she started dating at the beginning of this year when a colleague asked her out.

What then proceeded was one unmitigated disaster after another for her. She explicitly told me that she really wanted to lose her virginity before her 30th birthday this past October but was unable to. Any time it came down to brass tax the previous putz would go soft and they couldn't have sex, this happened on 3 separate occasions.

So every time she stayed over she was understandably trepidatious and needed time to mentally prepare. It wasn't a "failure" on my part to be a considerate partner, quite the opposite. But I know for certain that when she said soon she really meant soon because we had sex this morning. Once very early in the morning after waking up and then again (much more easily) some hours later. After the second time she confided that she was skeptical it would even work, in typical woman fashion she thought she was the problem, and was verbally relieved that it wasn't her after all.

Things are fantastic and only getting better.
 
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