Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Noodleface

Noodleface

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I don't know what she'd do, but she's not violent (yet) and mostly sane (she doesn't eat leftovers).

I base our marriage and the way I interact with her on mutual respect. At night we usually watch TV together when we can (4 month old in the house), and we always ask eachother what we want to watch and compromise. Sometimes I'll let her watch a show she's been waiting for and vice versa. Occasionally she'll just want to read and I'll ask if it's ok if I hop on the PS3/PS4 or something. It's never really been an issue, and I certainly don't abandon her and go to the office to play computer games. She was cool with me raiding once a week, but that was a set schedule and her father told her it was cool that I was leading raids.

At the end of the day it's compromise for both of us. If it wasn't, and for awhile I felt it wasn't, then it would just be shitty.

Edit: Also keep in mind our time together is limited. I leave the house at 6:30AM and return at 6:30PM. Usually I'm in bed by 10:30 or 11:00. I do enjoy gaming for sure, but with my wife being home with the baby all day I know me spending my hours with her instead of gaming means a lot more to her than gaming means to me.
 
Cud

Cud

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Talk to your lawyer about the ex parte protection order. Do not mention it to your wife. It can make her leave the apartment.
 
Cad

Cad

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That sounds really bad and unfortunate for all parties involved Tarrant. I don't think there's anything you can do by staying. That shit is pretty toxic.
 
Cad

Cad

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Noodlemod_sl said:
Worse is cud is offering legal advice too
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It's not me. :p

rrr_img_107288.jpg
 
Phazael

Phazael

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Tarrant, seriously get her the fuck out of the house by any legal means you can or get yourself and the kid the hell out. I am sure I don't need to tell you this, but once a woman is in "break your shit mode" its time to start protecting anything of value. This is especially true of a woman with untreated mental illness.
 
Gavinmad

Gavinmad

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There are no legal means to get her out of the house. Even if she threatens violence against him or their kid, she'll just deny it if Tarrant calls the cops.
 
Tarrant

Tarrant

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And I can't just up and move out, I'll never get custody if I do, it'll be argued that I abandoned the family.

What I'll end up doing is moving out all non essential stuff in a few weeks to storage, file, and then work on getting him to be able to move with me.

Like I have said before though...she loves our son. She's not a bad mom...she just has mental issues. Even with all of this I think I'm going to draw something up that may benefit us both. Split daycare, no child support with 3 days with her, 3 day with me with the odd day being switched out every week. I'll present this as this will give her time to have her alone time to "recharge" and most important, it doesn't rip my son away from her (good for both him and her), and will have less of an impact on him. I'll also get it in writing that we switch off claiming him on taxes.

This will have to be presented again, once things blow over. If she rejects it, I'll have to go for the throat...which I'd rather not do.
 
Cad

Cad

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Tarrant_sl said:
And I can't just up and move out, I'll never get custody if I do, it'll be argued that I abandoned the family.

What I'll end up doing is moving out all non essential stuff in a few weeks to storage, file, and then work on getting him to be able to move with me.
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Get a new place and move him with you. You're still married, there's no custody order, your move out is as valid as hers would be. You think women have never moved in with their parents and taken the kids and then won custody?

Go rent an apartment, move in with your parents, whatever. Take him with you and gtfo. File for divorce ASAP.
 
Tarrant

Tarrant

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Cad_sl said:
Get a new place and move him with you. You're still married, there's no custody order, your move out is as valid as hers would be.You think women have never moved in with their parents and taken the kids and then won custody?

Go rent an apartment, move in with your parents, whatever. Take him with you and gtfo. File for divorce ASAP.
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This is a common thought that many have and many are wrong. You can't do this, even though you both have equal rights to your child, their legal home is where authorities will bind them too except in cases of physical violence in which case usually the offender is removed. There is such a thing as parental kidnapping and it'll come back and bite me in the rear later when fighting for him.

I've also been told as such by lawyers as well.
 
Cad

Cad

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609.26 - 2014 Minnesota Statutes

Defenses:
(1) the person reasonably believed the action taken was necessary to protect the child from physical or sexual assault or substantial emotional harm;

Destroying your stuff at home and telling the kid you're a bad person gives you reasonable belief that she's physically and emotionally harmful.

If you want to wait, fine, wait. But go see a lawyer TODAY, file immediately. Get her served and get a hearing on temporary custody immediately so you can gtfo.

She destroys your stuff over leaving her at home but she's going to be reasonable on custody and visitation? Think, man.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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She starts breaking your stuff like a little child taking their ball home.. I don't think she'll settle for the easy thing you have drawn up
 
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