Most screwed up thing your parent/bro/sis/gf/bf has told you?

Since this is a fucked up thing, I have one more I just remembered. This was from my step-father's family, and happened when I was in highschool. His sister had a really fucking weird kid that was around 12 or 13. I can't stress that this kid just looked fucked up, you knew something was wrong with him. One Sunday at church he disappeared and no one could find him. Also a 5 year old girl disappeared and no one could find her. Turns out he lured her into the church basement and raped her. Guys been in a mental lockup for around 16 years now, no one has seen him except his mother. I guess it fits in this thread as my parents told me about it happening, but I just had to throw this in there. I forgot about it since it wasn't really my family (hate my step family) and I sort of blocked it out.

Noodleface turning this shit up to 12.

Are you from the south too, Noodles?

No, Massachusetts - for what it's worth.

Damn it, stop ruining my fun attempts at stereotyping.

This has unexpectedly become the most uplifting thread on Rerolled for me. Everything I ever thought was "bad" about my life is damn peachy compared to the shit being posted here. My parents are happily married, I have a loving and supportive network of extended family, well-adjusted and successful siblings, and no truly traumatic childhood events in my life.

Whenever I feel a bit depressed I'm going to hop into this thread to remind myself what a fucked up life really is.

So what did you think was fucked up about your boring life before? They were out of your size khakis at Old Navy or something?

Only real fucked up thing I ever learned was that my grandfather was POW in WW2 and nobody in the family except my grandmother and my grandfather's sister (great aunt obviously) knew about it. My sister was doing some research thing for a school project and by some odd chance typed his name into Google and a page popped up that had a list of all the members of the 101st Airborne that were captured on D-Day and his name was on it. Same first, middle initial, last name, and rank. My mom called my grandmother to ask about it and she confirmed. Even until the day he died I never asked him about that war nor did he ever talk about it, but he'd talk til your ears bleed about Vietnam. He's still my badass hero... 101st Airborne from 1941-1971, the exact 30 wrong years to be in the US Army.

Famm_sl said:

So what did you think was fucked up about your boring life before? They were out of your size khakis at Old Navy or something?

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Wasn't McCheese the guy who was living in Kazakhstan and had some crazy Russian chick about to cut his dick off?

The only thing I can think of is how my grandmother, who was a political figure of her city and member of an individual liberties / pro-business right wing party, explained to me when I was a child that left wing parties were about controlling every facet of your life, like deciding at what hours of what days you could go to public parks, while with her party everyone can choose when they want to go to the park! I don't remember what prompted this explanation though, so maybe it was not brainwashing but a honest attempt at explaining politics with concepts a 5 year old could understand.

I still lean toward brainwashing though. She was probably eager to plan her seeds in my mind before my communist father could! In defense of my father, he never tied to impose his views on me and he grew up in a context where you were one of two things: communist or accomplice of the dictatorship.

Not the most screwed up thing (cause I ain't sharing that) but one thing is, while I knew my father and his sister were placed in a state run institution during their teens, I never knew why. Found out later it was because my grandma had gone drunk driving and killed someone, so they tossed her ass in prison, while my grandpa was in Korea. And either he couldn't or choose not to come back to take care of his kids, so off they went. Some of the stories I've heard of their years in there was like shit outta Lord of the Flies or something.

My teen brother killing our family dog and her puppy with a handgun in order to earn the right to get his driver's license. The first shot apparantly only ripped off the jaw or something of the mother and then they obviously freaked out so it took many other shots to kill them. Story I wish I had never heard. I loved that ole girl.

Eomer_sl said:

Wasn't McCheese the guy who was living in Kazakhstan and had some crazy Russian chick about to cut his dick off?

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I forgot all about that story. That was solid GWBYHT material.

khalid_sl said:

My teen brother killing our family dog and her puppy with a handgun in order to earn the right to get his driver's license.

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Wtf? Who put him up to this?

That is some fucked up repugnant shit.

khalid_sl said:

My teen brother killing our family dog and her puppy with a handgun in order to earn the right to get his driver's license. The first shot apparantly only ripped off the jaw or something of the mother and then they obviously freaked out so it took many other shots to kill them. Story I wish I had never heard. I loved that ole girl.

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I seem to recall this, did you post this somewhere else here before?

Malice_sl said:

Wtf? Who put him up to this?

That is some fucked up repugnant shit.

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Our stepfather.

Noodleface_sl said:

I seem to recall this, did you post this somewhere else here before?

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Yeah, I talked about it at some point before, I think in a thread on sociopaths or something in general chat.

Eomer_sl said:

Wasn't McCheese the guy who was living in Kazakhstan and had some crazy Russian chick about to cut his dick off?

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nah he's the guy that thinks all pizza tastes the same

Famm_sl said:

So what did you think was fucked up about your boring life before? They were out of your size khakis at Old Navy or something?

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Pretty much. I mean, it's all a matter of perspective, isn't it? That's the whole premise behind "first world problems", after all. My entire life has been full of first world problems. That said, I just thought of something that fits this thread:

When I was 7 or 8 years old my grandfather died of a heart attack. He always used to wake up really early before my grandmother, go down to the basement to get some bacon out of the freezer, and cook a good old fashioned hearty bacon and egg breakfast. One morning he was on his way down the steps to get the bacon and he had a heart attack and died, and my grandmother found him when she woke up. At least, that's the story my mom and dad told the 8-year-old McCheese. Last year we went out to dinner for my dad's birthday, and in the middle of the main course he says: "I have something I need to tell you all" (talking to me and my two siblings). He then goes on to explain that my grandfather didn't die of a heart attack, but rather woke up like usual that morning, went down into the basement, and ate a bullet from his hunting rifle. My grandmother was woken up by the shot and found his body down next to the freezer. No one has any idea why he did it; no note, no explanation. Needless to say, that put a hamper on the birthday dinner.

Yeah wow. My family aren't the most balanced bunch, but they're all mostly decent people, with no divorces or secret kids or rape or incest or violence. Thanks guys, I feel extra grateful for my life right now.

Still cheesy.