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Khane
Got something right about marriage
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Now this thread has me questioning if my incredible lack of correspondence with my parents is something they appreciate or not. I talk to my parents maybe twice a month, if they're lucky, and have been that way since I went away to college.
What do you parents think? Think you'll want your kids to leave you the fuck alone after they graduate high school?
What do you parents think? Think you'll want your kids to leave you the fuck alone after they graduate high school?
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That's an interesting question, Khane. I speak with my mother about every 4 or 5 days, and my siblings and I text almost daily. We're spread all over the world, so actually seeing one another all together at the same time is about a once every decade event. My wife, however, speaks to her parents maybe every other week, and her oldest sister about montly, but the other sisters weekly. We live in easy driving distance of almost all of them, but rarely get together. Both our respective parents seem happy with the arrangement. I think that happens organically.
I hope to keep in close contact with my kids. I know a lot of people may say that and not mean it, but I really hope that's the case.
Shortly before my dad died I talked to him about my son. I told him that if I was even a fraction of the pain in the ass he was that I am so sorry. He just smiled and said I was ten times worse. I asked him then if it was worth it. He said it wasn't worth it then but it was worth it now to see that I was raising my children the best way I could.
Khane I always felt my parents helped me realize how much I should keep in touch with them. When I was out of high school I went to boot camp real shortly afterwards. They give you ten days leave at the end. Back home my old room was an uncomfortable guest room filled with flowers and empty bird cages. It was time to stay away for a while. When I started getting my own identity my dad would call me up every so often to meet him at Hometown Buffet for a cheap dinner. I just worked with them on their cues.
Khane I always felt my parents helped me realize how much I should keep in touch with them. When I was out of high school I went to boot camp real shortly afterwards. They give you ten days leave at the end. Back home my old room was an uncomfortable guest room filled with flowers and empty bird cages. It was time to stay away for a while. When I started getting my own identity my dad would call me up every so often to meet him at Hometown Buffet for a cheap dinner. I just worked with them on their cues.
Are you joking? You would have to be pretty insufferable for your parents to be happy for you to leave them alone after the work they put in.
opiate82
Bronze Squire
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Tough to say. I live a couple blocks from my parents and see them almost daily. They are more like peers than parents now that I am older but part of that might be because they had me relatively young (19/23) so we can still relate to each other. For what it is worth all my friends also love hanging out with my parents and always talk about how our relationship is so much different than what they have with their parents.
I hope to have a similar relationship with my daughter and any other kids I might have when they are adults but I definitely want them to have their own lives and space if they need it.
Oh I know there is some joking to it and yeah the Christmas present thing was hilarious. It really boils down to whether your kids make you lose hair or make you smile every day. My kids make my wife and I lose hair by the day.
Cad
scientia potentia est
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Which, if you read the entire message I wrote, subjectively yes kids are worth it because they bring a lot of joy into your life, but objectively, they obstruct your life, cost you money, and bring stress into your life and relationship. If you have to do a pro/con, all the cons are hard things you can point at, and all the pros are touchy-feely Tanoomba type reasons. Doesn't mean you shouldn't have them, hell, I have them and I don't regret it. It's just one of those questions that people give flippant answers to and get all indignant if you question them on it (see: your response) when really, it's a very valid question that deserves a bit of analysis.
Joeboo
Molten Core Raider
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I not only talk to, but interact with my parents a LOT more now that I have a kid of my own. Not just purely from the fact that they want to see their only grandkid constantly, but I think about how much I miss my little guy if I even go half a day without seeing him. I basically disappeared on my parents for the entire decade of my 20s. Went off to college, was then busy with variosu jobs/girlfriends/friends/hobbies. I probably spent my entire 20s not talking to my mom or dad more than once or twice a month. They'd usually have to call me to make sure I was still alive(and I was bad about returning voicemails). Looking back on that, I feel bad. Especially since I'm an only child. It's not like I have some older sister that gabs on the phone with my mom every day or something to fill that void.
Making up for lost time now though, I see my parents more as real people, or even friends, than parents. They're fun to hang out with, drink with, talk to, etc. I definitely didn't feel that way when I was younger.
Making up for lost time now though, I see my parents more as real people, or even friends, than parents. They're fun to hang out with, drink with, talk to, etc. I definitely didn't feel that way when I was younger.
Xarpolis
Life's a Dream
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My daughter started Preschool this week, and so far she loves it. First day she did finger painting, next day she played with toys and sorted things. Her language is already chaging for whatever reason. Last night she thought that she broke one of her toys, then a second later said "ok, maybe not." That was never in her vocabulary before. Aside from that, she had to go help her mother upstairs and told me "Daddy, I'll be back in 2 minutes". Again, that's all new. Really happy to see these changes.
I see my daughter as being more mechanically inclined. She loves figuring out puzzles and stuff. And she's starting to do rudimentary constructions with duplo blocks. Specifically, putting all the green ones together and the blue ones together. But that's at least a start.
In other news, yesterday was her 3rd birthday and she enjoyed the idea of a birthday cake. My wife made a carrot cake that she took into preschool. Good times.
I see my daughter as being more mechanically inclined. She loves figuring out puzzles and stuff. And she's starting to do rudimentary constructions with duplo blocks. Specifically, putting all the green ones together and the blue ones together. But that's at least a start.
In other news, yesterday was her 3rd birthday and she enjoyed the idea of a birthday cake. My wife made a carrot cake that she took into preschool. Good times.
Xarpolis
Life's a Dream
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PS - Sorry for completely derailing the discussion. Allow me to atone for that now.
I work for the family business. My dad is the present owner, but my grandfather started it. I've worked here on and off since I was 13 years old (33 now). I'm currently an office jockey, but grew up out on the shop floor running machinery. Anyway, I see my dad for hours on end every single day, and he's still a pain in the ass. I understand that he has good intentions, but growing up he wanted me to act like an employee and not a child. I recall being grounded for YEARS on end just because I wanted to play a video game rather than do homework. That said, I was never a bad kid. I didn't drink or do drugs, but I was always in trouble as if I had done much worse.
Anyway, now I look at him like a lazy goofball. As I've aged, I realize just how much how he's "given up" on virtually everything. He wants to coast through life and continually makes bad decisions on this goal, while maintaining the stranglehold on every bit of power he has. I realize that he has never been the pinnacle of guidance that I thought he was while growing up. In fact, it was his father that made all of the good decisions in our family and started us off on a decent life, and he's done everything he can to keep it from toppling over once he's gotten his own hands on it.
Ok, that sounds incredibly evil and negative, but I don't mean it to be that way. He's genuinely a nice/good guy, but I don't think I would have much interaction with him if it weren't for the business. It's probably the constant judgmental tones and looks of disappointment that have plagued my life. Disappointment in such trivial things like I'm not left handed the way he is. Time to swap subjects on to my mother...
My mom is awesome. Growing up, I always disliked her, because her go to voice was a shout. "Take out the trash" "...in a second." (screaming) "NOW!" She's always been extremely high strung, but I didn't realize that until growing older also. She doesn't handle stress well, where as I do. Different strokes for different folks, I guess. Anyway, as I've aged and moved from under her roof, I started to appreciate all of the things she did for me as a child. She always made dinner or cleaned up after me. Always did the laundry and allowed me to be a shitty EverQuest nerd all day and night if I wanted to be. I understand a lot of the hardships that she's faced in life, and fully understand why she happily divorced my father. And I'm really happy now that she's remarried, because she needed that. I tend to see my mother usually once a month, but I chat with her a bit more often. She loves seeing my daughter, which is a big bonus.
I'm just rambling now, and forgot the point of this post. Anyway, mom = good, dad = neutral.
I work for the family business. My dad is the present owner, but my grandfather started it. I've worked here on and off since I was 13 years old (33 now). I'm currently an office jockey, but grew up out on the shop floor running machinery. Anyway, I see my dad for hours on end every single day, and he's still a pain in the ass. I understand that he has good intentions, but growing up he wanted me to act like an employee and not a child. I recall being grounded for YEARS on end just because I wanted to play a video game rather than do homework. That said, I was never a bad kid. I didn't drink or do drugs, but I was always in trouble as if I had done much worse.
Anyway, now I look at him like a lazy goofball. As I've aged, I realize just how much how he's "given up" on virtually everything. He wants to coast through life and continually makes bad decisions on this goal, while maintaining the stranglehold on every bit of power he has. I realize that he has never been the pinnacle of guidance that I thought he was while growing up. In fact, it was his father that made all of the good decisions in our family and started us off on a decent life, and he's done everything he can to keep it from toppling over once he's gotten his own hands on it.
Ok, that sounds incredibly evil and negative, but I don't mean it to be that way. He's genuinely a nice/good guy, but I don't think I would have much interaction with him if it weren't for the business. It's probably the constant judgmental tones and looks of disappointment that have plagued my life. Disappointment in such trivial things like I'm not left handed the way he is. Time to swap subjects on to my mother...
My mom is awesome. Growing up, I always disliked her, because her go to voice was a shout. "Take out the trash" "...in a second." (screaming) "NOW!" She's always been extremely high strung, but I didn't realize that until growing older also. She doesn't handle stress well, where as I do. Different strokes for different folks, I guess. Anyway, as I've aged and moved from under her roof, I started to appreciate all of the things she did for me as a child. She always made dinner or cleaned up after me. Always did the laundry and allowed me to be a shitty EverQuest nerd all day and night if I wanted to be. I understand a lot of the hardships that she's faced in life, and fully understand why she happily divorced my father. And I'm really happy now that she's remarried, because she needed that. I tend to see my mother usually once a month, but I chat with her a bit more often. She loves seeing my daughter, which is a big bonus.
I'm just rambling now, and forgot the point of this post. Anyway, mom = good, dad = neutral.
Izo
Tranny Chaser
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Ritual circumcision linked to increased risk of autism in young boys, research suggests -- ScienceDaily
Something for you to consider, Tubro?
Something for you to consider, Tubro?
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Izo
Tranny Chaser
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For every scientific article you provide that says circumcision causes autism, I can provide one that says it doesn't.
Tuco
I got Tuco'd!
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*shrug* from what I can tell it's a wash. And if both sides are even in terms of research I'll stick to the side that doesn't involve stabbing babies in the dick.
They also didn't cite the correlation so it's hard to know what it is.
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