Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2015)

Column_sl

shitlord
9,833
7
Heh, George Lucas screened the movie ,and couldn't help but make a backhanded comment toward the fans of Star Wars.

Hope this movie lives up to the hype if only to make him more salty.
 

koljec_sl

shitlord
845
2
i got some spoilers on this from a friend who saw a screening over the weekend. read at your own risk:

- evil Jedi is Luke's son
- evil Jedi kills Luke at the end in a parallel to Vader killing Obi Wan
- Leia uses force powers at some point in the movie
If you really want to know:
- Kylo Ren is Han and Leia's son
- Kylo Ren was a Jedi pupil of Luke but now has a Sith Lord
- Kylo Ren kills Han
- Rey is Luke's daughter and and will be trained by Luke as the last Jedi hope
- the Millenium Falcon is still flying, piloted by Chewbacca
 

Valderen

Space Pirate
<Bronze Donator>
4,476
2,652
Jar Jar is still alive and will be revealed to be the Sith Master who taught Kylo Ren, the Gungan Empire is now called The First Order.

I thought all of this was obvious.
smile.png
 

Famm

Ahn'Qiraj Raider
11,041
794
Only ten more days until this thread becomes the most unreadable contentious area of the board!
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
<Nazi Janitors>
28,329
43,180
Only ten more days until this thread becomes the most unreadable contentious area of the board!
As a very casual Star Wars fan, I'm looking forward to the shit show this thread will become.
 

Hoss

Make America's Team Great Again
<Gold Donor>
25,779
13,284
The first time I saw them do the shameless Makeup merchandising plug was with one of the Hunger Games. They literally played an intro commercial before the movie with a tag line akin to, "DO YOU! want to glam out like the citizens of Hunger Games!" Who would want to look like that seriously. Rupaul doesn't even go that overboard for fucks sake. The only way they could have positioned make up sales in relation to Star Wars that would have made it even remotely interesting, is if they were selling make up kits and prosthetics so you could create your own alien species or dress up as a Togruta or some shit. If they did that imagine all the ultra fat nerdboys at the next Con with lekku, one Omega nerd could be Jabba for realsy.
How is Star Wars makeup any more out of line than tumblers, koozies, cookies, or cereal? It's like you don't understand how merchandising works.


Also not sure what is going on with Finn, I mean he was trained as a storm trooper right? He seems like a new kid who has never been in a fight not a trained solider. Every scene he seems to be freaking out. I would think that unless it was like his first day on the job he would have a little more bravado by then, even being a storm trooper. If all the other stormtroopers were as scared as him the empire would fucking fail in a day.
My guess is he's feeling exposed without his armour and fellow troopers as backup. Plus, he probably came out of training with the idea that stormtroopers are pretty fucking badass (call it brainwashing if you want, but that's probably not the correct word). Not to mention, it's entirely possible he hadn't seen combat yet as a stormtrooper.
 

Famm

Ahn'Qiraj Raider
11,041
794
I think its racist. Are they saying that black men are cowards who need some old cracker motherfucker to lead them?
 

Frenzic

Lord Nagafen Raider
884
61
If you really want to know:
- Kylo Ren is Han and Leia's son
- Kylo Ren was a Jedi pupil of Luke but now has a Sith Lord
- Kylo Ren kills Han
- Rey is Luke's daughter and and will be trained by Luke as the last Jedi hope
- the Millenium Falcon is still flying, piloted by Chewbacca
This has been posted for months (or longer) on various websites, but still people refuse to believe it. This is exactly how it's going to happen folks. Can't wait for the movie to launch and the mouth breathers to come back saying "I knew it!" when the shit was leaked forever ago and people just chose to ignore it. Either way, story is good, movie is good, hype is real!
 

koljec_sl

shitlord
845
2
This has been posted for months (or longer) on various websites, but still people refuse to believe it. This is exactly how it's going to happen folks. Can't wait for the movie to launch and the mouth breathers to come back saying "I knew it!" when the shit was leaked forever ago and people just chose to ignore it. Either way, story is good, movie is good, hype is real!
Yep. It'll definitely still be fun to see it.
 

Ravishing

Uninspiring Title
<Bronze Donator>
8,455
3,577
This has been posted for months (or longer) on various websites, but still people refuse to believe it. This is exactly how it's going to happen folks. Can't wait for the movie to launch and the mouth breathers to come back saying "I knew it!" when the shit was leaked forever ago and people just chose to ignore it. Either way, story is good, movie is good, hype is real!
- Kylo Ren is Han and Leia's son
- Kylo Ren was a Jedi pupil of Luke but now has a Sith Lord
- Kylo Ren kills Han
- Rey is Luke's daughter and and will be trained by Luke as the last Jedi hope
- the Millenium Falcon is still flying, piloted by Chewbacca
Not sure if spoilers are necessary since it's all hypothetical, but my take on this shit:

The "spoilers" above are easy guesses for sure, but Ren killing Han doesn't mirror New Hope. Ren would have to kill his "Master", which is certainly not going to be Han. Also, It really seems like Ren and Rey are going to be siblings, and their parents are most likely going to be Han & Leia, so I doubt Ren kills his own Dad.

Luke probably has no offspring and is most likely to be the "Master" and to eventually face off against Ren. Of the old cast, he's most likely to be killed first. Maybe Han dies too somewhere, but seems a bit overloaded if you kill off all the old timers in the first episode. I expect Luke or Han to make Ep 8, and I'm expecting just one of them to die in Ep 7. Gotta keep the emotional shit spaced out.

In the trailers we see Ren almost slicing Rey's head off. IMO he stops himself since she's his sister. Maybe he feels the force in her or some shit if he's not sure right away they're siblings. Or maybe he's proving a point to her and wants her to join him on the dark side.

Can't wait.
 

Borzak

Bronze Baron of the Realm
24,821
32,301
Thread needs a poll to guess if the movie will be great, meh, or a total piece of shit.
 

Famm

Ahn'Qiraj Raider
11,041
794
Thread needs a poll to guess if the movie will be great, meh, or a total piece of shit.
That's a wide gap. We'd at least need "pretty good" or something, since "meh" is mostly negative. I'm saying "pretty good". A far cry from the prequels, but not close to Fury Road. Its going to be fun, with lots of fan service and some good effects/battles, but not a legendary instant classic.
 

Sterling

El Presidente
13,028
7,945
Yeah. We'd need some gradation. Alltime Classic, Very Good, Pretty Good, Average, Meh, Bad, M Night directs a Michael Bay original starring Lorenzo Lamas.