Swamp Donkey, Mom of the year.

Are you...

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LachiusTZ

LachiusTZ

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Zaara said:
You're not going to finish out med school, stop lying to yourself.
Your boyfriend is not going to fix you. Your last and most true memento will be a picture of his semen leaking out of your vodka-soaked shotgun blast of a snatch, taken as a form of petty white-trash revenge against the father of your child.
There will be no blissful apotheosis, even if you choose to abandon your children completely.
You fucked your life and you are too weak and shitty and stupid to unfuck it. This will not end happily in a well-kept suburban home, a life of direction and purpose, where a man who actually loves you sows another baby-seed to go along with your first two mistakes. No sane man will move to inherit the wreckage of your white-trash life.
The only thing that put you on the map to the rest of the world were a few undignified tit shots and an ugly, shitty online persona to go along with your shitty, ugly IRL personality. The rest of your total sum of existence will be confined to whatever shit apartment you get put up in, partners slowly degrading in worth, comforts of your youth and looks obliterated by alcohol, accumulating with the filth and trash that is the outer reflection of your inner character. You inherited Ravvenn's legacy, and don't even have pictures of you fresh-faced and smiling in a mansion hot tub to comfort you.

You deserve this. A death spiral put up for a bunch of uncaring strangers to see and laugh at.
Cunt.
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You could be my Trex.
 
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Aldarion

Aldarion

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DickTrickle said:
I'd probably be more likely to trust someone that has dozens of positive reports than I would the daughter next door just because the parents seem okay. Kid with no known babysitting experience could flip the fuck out if a kid acts bad.
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If youre ready to take "online reviews" as meaningful feedback about a service or person we are just gonna have to agree to disagree.

Online reviews are a fine medium for humor, and are valuable in that sense, but I'd trust them for recommending a babysitter as far as I would trust my online colleagues Trex and Tyen for marital advice. Its 2018, and people still think anonymous online reviews mean something?
 
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DickTrickle

DickTrickle

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Aldarion said:
If youre ready to take "online reviews" as meaningful feedback about a service or person we are just gonna have to agree to disagree.

Online reviews are a fine medium for humor, and are valuable in that sense, but I'd trust them for recommending a babysitter as far as I would trust my online colleagues Trex and Tyen for marital advice. Its 2018, and people still think anonymous online reviews mean something?
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I'm sure every babysitter hires a fake review company to bolster their ratings. And there's no way to evaluate information online.

Meanwhile, you had BBQ with your neighbors and they were cool, so their daughter is capable of watching your kids, with zero hesitation.
 
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Oldbased

Oldbased

> Than U
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DickTrickle said:
You understand things really well.
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I have an extremely solid grasp of the social declines of humanity.
That is why I have decided to make a honest babysitting, taxi and escort app and it will address the many concerns and faults in the previous apps, including murderous drivers, baby smothering sitters and women who are really men. First 2 miles, 2 hours and hookup is free. Download now on Google Play or on our website, iknoweverythingaboutyou.ru
 
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Ritley

Ritley

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I’m pretty sure every one of these babysitting services do background checks and references, along with the user reviews.

Hell of a lot more vetted than the 16 year old daughter of the neighbor you wave to once a week as you drive by
 
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A

a_skeleton_03

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Aldarion said:
If youre ready to take "online reviews" as meaningful feedback about a service or person we are just gonna have to agree to disagree.

Online reviews are a fine medium for humor, and are valuable in that sense, but I'd trust them for recommending a babysitter as far as I would trust my online colleagues Trex and Tyen for marital advice. Its 2018, and people still think anonymous online reviews mean something?
Click to expand...
So what do you trust for hiring a babysitter?
 
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LachiusTZ

LachiusTZ

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Olebass said:
Trust me. I've thought it out in my brain and lost a woman I really loved over it.
The clothing, needing a good safe car, spending entire weekends doing things together, health care, good schooling which means living in high end districts. I just never felt I could provide all that.
My brother had 4 kids when he died at 41 and I was 34. 3 of them were over 18 at that time but I saw the child support, and emotional train wreck that followed and ended any question that I would ever have kids but I made the choice well before that at 22 when I tossed the idea and someone I loved over it.
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Real talk. I'll buy you a beer some day
 
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Evernothing

Evernothing

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You know. If the kids did burn the house down and trex trex survived, she would look even more like The Hound.
 
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LachiusTZ

LachiusTZ

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chaos said:
Everyone's cracking on the app, but I wish we'd had something like that when my kids were younger. It's hard to find people, especially people with a verifiable track record.
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Something Hillary email server something something classified something
 
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Chukzombi

Chukzombi

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Skull Kid said:
Shit. Anything revelatory in the last 50 pages? TL;DR version
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tyen showed a bunch of purchases and claimed swamp donkey made all of them for booze. though they are all different amounts. like if you get your drink on every day you buy the same thing at the same store and it should come out to the same price
 
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Himeo

Himeo

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tyen said:
For some reason women find my personality extremely attractive. Enough to bypass all those restrictions.

I don't quite get it myself either, but it's been easy for me
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Yeah, bro. Chicks love weed, coke, meth, or whatever the fuck you were paying her with.
 
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tyen

tyen

EQ in a browser wait time: ____
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Aldarion said:
If youre ready to take "online reviews" as meaningful feedback about a service or person we are just gonna have to agree to disagree.

Online reviews are a fine medium for humor, and are valuable in that sense, but I'd trust them for recommending a babysitter as far as I would trust my online colleagues Trex and Tyen for marital advice. Its 2018, and people still think anonymous online reviews mean something?
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Your whole point is based on anonymous online reviews of babysitters. Which isnt true at all. To get a review, you have to work a babysitting gig. Its like a lyft star review after your ride
 
PatrickStar

PatrickStar

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You have 24 Hours. If after that time this thread does not produce Tyen’s GF, new tit pics, Trex’s asshole pic, the abusive grandpa, or the 68 year old war vet that Trex whored herself out to, I humbly request the mods Hall of Shame this thread, and ban both of your accounts. The rest of this forum will cheer in your banning, as will several other members that have left the forum.

To be brief, we did not suffer through dozens of pages of your drivel, responding to your idiotic comments with our forum-mates, so we could get no worthwhile pics and just the troll attempts of Trex's cuck. EVEN if you did produce the goods, FUCK YOU GUYS. Seriously, FUCK YOU.

I cannot believe this... right now we’re so apathetic to your shit. I am sitting here, and a lot of this forum is just sitting around while you two repeatedly try to one up each other on how much of a reprehensible parent you are. Don't you people have ANY FUCKING DECENCY? TYEN WHY DON'T YOU STOP USING YOUR TIPS FOR YOUR WEED AND TREX WHY DON'T YOU STOP DRINKING LIKE A CHEAP WHORE AND START GETTING YOUR LIVES IN ORDER FOR THE SAKE OF THE CHILDREN?

The tragic irony of you creating this thread is once again we are reminded of what cancers you two are. We may be in our 80th version of this forum, but we will create 18 new ones if we have to so we can finally get rid of you.
24 Hours.... after that I beseech the mods to banish this thread as your way of farming tuconets and airing dirty laundry to the all time Hall of Shame section by which all other shit threads will be judged against in the future. We are done playing ball with you useless fuckers... it's your turn to get banned
 
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Void

Void

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Axlrose said:
I am still catching up with this train wreck of a thread and perhaps this was noted, but if TIMFB is the new jocker asked by our token Russian Intelligence officer about why he kissed a guy in Vegas, if TIMFB was legitimate, then why would he answer "It got him laid." instead of "It got me laid."? Another person talking in third person?

"So Axl, why aren't you sleeping since you have work tonight? He seems distracted by this thread at the moment. along with talking about himself in the third person."
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I really have no idea why I'm bothering, but I'm assuming that TIMFB is saying he kissed the other dude and the other dude got laid because of it. I hate to even try imagining being in one of these people's shoes, but maybe it was something like this:

a_dumb_bitch_01: Oh yeah? I don't think you're secure enough in your masculinity to fuck my smelly hippy Portland transqueer twat. If you can prove it, I'm all yours.

Friend trying to get laid: But aren't my forehead kisses enough? Ok then, how about if I suck my friend's dick right here? Will that prove I'm secure enough, oh TrailerPrincess?

a_dumb_bitch_01: Eww, no, you don't have to suck his dick. How about just a quick tongue kiss?

TIMFB: Sure dude, whatever, I'll swap spit with you. I've already kissed SwampDonkey, how much worse can it be? And besides, I've already tasted your jizz I'm sure, either from SD's twat or your spirit cooking, so no big deal.
 
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pharmakos

pharmakos

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tyen said:
19 flights of steel stairs in a stairwell that has 30+floors
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everyone is calling shenanigans on this one, but i can totally see how a young child could do this... each step is a lot harder to lift your foot over when you're only a few feet tall. i used to do the same thing sometimes when i was a kid.
 
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