The Girls Who Broke Your Heart Thread

Tsar Bomba said:

You do that - she wins.

Don't you ever fucking say that again.

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I don't know you or Tsar Bomba, but what he said. Don't ever say that shit again. Nothing is ever that bad.

Conefed said:

I'm still trying to figure it out myself.
conformity, duty, and obligation certainly have a hand.

but I think the classic "known vs unknown" mechanic is in play also. it gets shitty for me, it really does. it may even lead to me offing myself. but like all my relationships have been a brand of fucking terrible and the next could be worse. likewise, the stay alone and take on complete burdens of everyday life isn't optimal either.
she at least does chores for the most part

her episodes are almost the new normal. for example, the next day after that she made breakfast and we went strawberry picking like nothing happened. but a guarantee you the points that specifically upset her haven't left (regardless of merit)

i'm not there yet// haven't figured it out.

I just know she breaks my heart, yet I unconditionally love

hate for me is not the answer. I think if a build enough evidence to convince myself it's better for everybody .. I don't know.

I think her and her crazy mother will crank it up to boss level should I split and I fear for my son. One thought is moving an inconvenient amount of distance away (with child) for the first few years. dunno

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Woah Dude! That would be a shitty thing to do to your kid. If you off yourself your kid will only have one center of influence in his life and if she is as crazy as you say, your kid will be REALLY fucked! You have two jobs right now 1) get happy and 2) teach your kid how to be a rationale happy adult.

I don't know how to fix the situation with your wife because I obviously do not know all the details. With that said I have to assume there was once love and mutual respect between the two of you. Perhaps that isn't completely lost, perhaps you can open up some dialogue? Perhaps a hand-written letter to your wife? Use "I feel" statements and avoid accusations, let her know you miss the way things used to be. Ask her how you can help things get better, and let her know you are willing to put the work in if she is, however if she is unwilling to help things get better ask her what solution she would advise. Good luck, no matter what you choose to do, with the exception of suicide...that I hope you fail at without doing any long term damage to yourself. Think of your kid Dude! DO NOT OFF YOURSELF!

Women don't respect weak men. That's as simple as it gets.

If you want your wife (or hell, anyone) to respect you, you need to stop being weak. I get the depression shit, but you absolutely can not be a doormat or it's going to make things worse. Women are with you because they want someone they can count on, someone to be their rock. They want someone who can tell them that everything is alright and believe it. They want someone who hops out of bed in the middle of the night to go investigate wtf that noise was. They want someone who can make decisions and feels confident about them.

Right now, this is not you, and you need to fix that for your own sanity, and chances are pretty good she'll fall back into line after you do. As cliche as it sounds, hit the gym. You're going to feel better, you're going to look better, and that confidence will translate to your interactions with everyone around you.

100% of the men I know who get treated like shit by their wives are not in control of their relationship. They get an allowance every week (from money they make), they don't make decisions about their own free time, and more often than not, they also stopped getting regular sex years ago. It's because she doesn't respect you, so she's treating you like a child.

It's also possible she treats you like shit because she's a cunt. If that's the case, then it won't stop after you build up some confidence, but you just won't take her shit anymore and she'll move on. It's a win/win for everyone involved.

lurkingdirk said:

Yes. Every single woman on the planet, roughly 3.5 billion, right? You can make a simple statement about what every single one of them wants in a man. That doesn't sound ridiculous at all as a starting premise. I'm sure you have a much better understanding of this guy's situation than he does, because you know what every single woman in the world wants in a man.

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What's your deal dude, are you trolling or what?

Seriously, a woman's biological imperative is to obtain the best partner she can to produce the best offspring she can. Do you think we're so far removed from the animal kingdom that all the mating competitions that exist in multiple species from deer to birds to goats don't apply to us?

I don't even know what your argument is here. You think that women want depressed pushover men? Why the fuck does the internet even exist then? All of the guys on it should be just drowning in pussy.