47 Ronin

spronk

spronk

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Coming this christmas, new movie starring Keanu Reeves as a half-japanese slave who returns to fight monsters and shit? The original 47 Ronin story was about 47 samurai who lose their master in battle and fight to avenge his death ala 7 Samurai, not sure why they needed to put in a shit-ton of dragons, ogres, kiri (?) and other magical stuff in here. Looks more like Neo in Japan.

Plus the whole white-guy-saves-Japan thing...

 
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satael

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So I take it this movie has nothing to do with the previous 47 Ronin and the actual historic events (of 1702)?
 
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Zhaun_sl

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I was going to say we need some foreign folks to make THE ALAMO or some other importance piece of American folklore and turn it into something completely different with fire breathing Kentuckians and Kansas women with laser-eyes or some stupid shit.

But knowing today's audience, they'd think it is brilliant and historically accurate and be going home to see if they were related to "that cool Davy Crocker guy with the possum-skin hat that shot lighting from his cock." on Wikipedia.

And I would just die a little more inside.
 
McCheese

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Zhaun_sl said:
I was going to say we need some foreign folks to make THE ALAMO or some other importance piece of American folklore and turn it into something completely different with fire breathing Kentuckians and Kansas women with laser-eyes or some stupid shit.

But knowing today's audience, they'd think it is brilliant and historically accurate and be going home to see if they were related to "that cool Davy Crocker guy with the possum-skin hat that shot lighting from his cock." on Wikipedia.

And I would just die a little more inside.
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That sounds awesome. I'd love to see The Alamo remade with a brave group of defenders holding the alamo against a horde of ravenous demons which escaped from hell during an ancient Indian burial ritual. Right at the last minute, the defenders will figure out how to summon protective native American spirits to rise up and combat the demon army.
 
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Taloo_sl

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McCheese_sl said:
That sounds awesome. I'd love to see The Alamo remade with a brave group of defenders holding the alamo against a horde of ravenous demons which escaped from hell during an ancient Indian burial ritual. Right at the last minute, the defenders will figure out how to summon protective native American spirits to rise up and combat the demon army.
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I would watch this movie. Twice maybe.
 
bixxby

bixxby

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Isn't Keanu Reeves half asian?

Fake edit: yes kinda: Reeves was born in Beirut, Lebanon, the son of Patricia Bond (n?e Taylor), a costume designer/performer, and Samuel Nowlin Reeves, Jr. His mother was English and his father was a Hawaiian-born American of Native Hawaiian, English, Irish, Portuguese, and Chinese descen
 
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Archangel_sl

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....yeaaaaaahhhh, I saw that trailer last night, and all I could do is cringe. I'm not of Japanese, or even Asian descent, but holy crap, even I felt borderline offended. Keanu??? I prayed he would be mute in the film, but then he goes and talks at the end, taunting. Epic facepalm.
 
spronk

spronk

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Whats weird to me is how Keanu had another kung fu movie that is coming out/came out this year, when I first saw 47 Ronin trailer I thought it was that other movie and was pretty confused as to how much the plot had changed, since the other movie was pretty much a straight up bloodsport/etc.

The other movie is Man of Tai Chi (not to be confused with Tai Chi Master or Tai Chi Zero!), and apparently its not even being released in the USA in theaters, came out in China a few weeks ago.
 
cabbitcabbit

cabbitcabbit

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rrr_img_37655.jpg
 
Hoss

Hoss

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Thanks for the heads up. I was excited when I heard this was being made. Now I know it was a false alarm. Is there someplace we can petition to make them change the fucking name?
 
Szlia

Szlia

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On the up side, there are not that many fantasy film set in medieval japan (you have a number of ghost stories, but it's more horror films than action movies).
 
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